


Virtually Submissive

by cleo4u2, xantissa



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Accidental Voyeurism, Angst, BDSM, Cock Cage, Condoms, Cuckolding, Denial, Dirty Talk, Dom!Bucky, Feelings, Forced Feminization, M/M, Mostly porn, Plot, Porn, Praise Kink, Sex Work, Sir Kink, Sub Drop, Violence, appearance of dubious consent (though no ACTUAL dubious consent or blackmail), boys in lingerie, computer dominance, dom!Steve (but not with Bucky), ignore tags at own risk, many more tags in the chapter notes, no powers au, real BDSM etiquette, safe sex, sub!Steve, voyerism
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-26
Updated: 2018-08-03
Packaged: 2018-09-27 02:50:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 65,012
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9947645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cleo4u2/pseuds/cleo4u2, https://archiveofourown.org/users/xantissa/pseuds/xantissa
Summary: Steve Rogers runs an online porn site where he plays virtual submissive, or dominant - for the right price. Bucky Barnes is ex-military with a past full of shadows. Neither are prepared for what happens after they meet and lose themselves in each other, slipping ever deeper into the world of BDSM before they even get to know each other.WARNING: Each and EVERY chapter will have its own additional set of warnings. Ignore them at your own risk. We will be exploring a lot of different kinks, too many to make tagging the top useless.This story now grew a plot and is definitely going to be completed.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into 中文 available: [【授翻】【冬盾】【BDSM】Virtually Submissive](https://archiveofourown.org/works/10644312) by [mingmingmie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mingmingmie/pseuds/mingmingmie)



> WARNINGS: Safeword use, under negotiated kink (first half of chapter only), toys, collaring, bondage (first half of chapter only), minor breath play, positional play, overstimulation, masturbation, mild pain play, nipple play
> 
> Huge thanks to our usual beta, , [NurseDarry](https://archiveofourown.org/users/NurseDarry/profile), because she is a perfect human being that agreed to beta kinks she doesn’t like too much for us. All hail the Glow Cloud!

When the doorbell rang, Steve took a deep breath and tried to control his anger. It wasn’t this guy’s fault that Sam, his usual partner, had had a family emergency. It wasn’t _his_ fault Steve had a deadline and a contract to fulfill, or he’d be completely broke and would never get another shot like this one. It wasn’t his fault Steve had had to turn to Tony fucking Stark for a favor, to find a guy who would be willing be Steve’s dom in a set of short films on BDSM. And it sure as hell wasn’t this guy’s fault that Steve was nervous as hell to be with a dom he’d never even met before, but he had a deadline and goddamn it he was going to be professional.

Opening the door, Steve had to admit Tony had found a guy that fit the description he’d asked for. Tall, broad, with a ruggedly handsome face. His hair was a little long, just enough to run your fingers through, but he was dressed simply. Jeans, boots, and a long sleeved t-shirt that was at least a size too small. Not that Steve was complaining; it showed off miles upon miles of muscles, and if his clients liked anything, it was a man with muscles.

“Hi, um, Bucky?” Steve asked, holding out his hand.

The man looked at him hesitantly from beneath his long hair and nodded, tentatively taking Steve’s hand in return. It wasn’t the kind of confidence Steve expected in a dom. There wasn’t much confidence to speak of at all.

“I’m Steve. Come on in.” Standing back, he held the door open for Bucky and put a smile on his face. “We’ll be working down in the basement. Do you mind if we get right to work? I kind of have a deadline.”

“Tony said,” Bucky replied shortly. “Lead the way.”

Bucky was doing his best not to look at Steve at all, and he wondered if that was because all he was wearing was a blue silk robe. Hopefully that shyness wouldn’t last. They wouldn’t be having sex, but they would be naked soon enough. How had Tony even found someone to partner him who was _shy_? Anyone in the industry lost their modesty real quick.

The door to the basement was just off the entryway, so Steve had no need to show Bucky the rest of his single story, Californian home. They went down the carpeted stairs, and Steve stopped, turning and swinging his arm out toward his sets. The back wall of the basement, beneath the stairs and out of sight of any camera, held the drawers full of supplies as well as a small fridge so no one had to invade the upper floor for a glass of water. That was his space. Down here was business. One corner of the basement was set up like a bedroom/office, queen sized bed, dresser, lamps, desk and elaborate computer as it doubled as his actual office. Hooks and eyelets had been hidden throughout the walls, wooden bedframe, and ceiling, but it was mostly used for light play. The other corner was set up like a dungeon, fake stone walls, chains, and all. For their current scene, a pulley was hanging from the ceiling.

“I wanted to use the bedroom for the films, but they requested the dungeon feel so we’ll be over there. I’ve set up the cameras so make sure you don’t stand in front of them, okay?”

Bucky just nodded, wandering into the dungeon set and inspecting the hooks in the walls. 

“Um, so the script?” Steve said, feeling more uncomfortable the less and less this guy said. “It’s gonna be pretty standard. Everything we’ll use is on that table there…”

Bucky turned from where he had been closely examining the hooks, and went to the table that Steve indicated. It had been reconditioned to look like stone, but was just plywood and styrofoam. On top rested leather-padded cuffs, rope, a heavy steel, nipple clamps with small weights, and an anal hook. Bucky picked up each, familiarizing himself with their heft and use, which relaxed Steve somewhat. There was a sureness to his touch, the way he handled the rope and metal. All the hesitation of before was gone, replaced by sharp focus. Suddenly the man seemed heavier, more solid, his presence filling the room when before he was all but meek in comparison. At least the guy knew what he was doing.

“We’ll start off with me standing, you order me into position and start tying me up. I’m wearing a plug, but we’ll have that out by then. I’ll need you to stretch me a little, just for show, really, then you can push in the hook, or put on the clamps. The order’s not really important.”

“I want to take it out.”

Steve froze, mouth half open in surprise at the interruption, but he couldn’t think of any reason to say no. That hadn’t been what shocked him, either. It was that Bucky had asked for anything at all. He’d just been too quiet so far.

“Sure, that’s fine. Um,” Steve glanced toward his rows of white Walmart plastic shelves and walked over to retrieve his collar. It was a simple, black leather affair with D rings at each of the four corners that he held in his hands, even as his nerves started to grow and he walked back to Bucky. “Do you have any questions?”

When he merely got a shake of the head, Steve felt his nerves grow.

“My safe word is ‘apple pie,’” Steve said, walking to each camera and turning them on. If Bucky hadn’t come with such a glowing recommendation from not just Tony, but Natasha, Steve would be stopping this right now. “I won’t mind if you don’t use the cuffs. Um, no other toys,” Steve internally winced; he shouldn’t have had to _say_ that. They'd agreed on the script. “If I use the safe word, you let me down and we’ll go from there.”

“Okay,” Bucky said quietly.

“You can say whatever you want to me,” Steve assured. “I won’t be using a lot of the audio from this anyways.”

The audio from the shitty single boom microphone down here was, well, shitty.

After getting yet another silent nod from Bucky, Steve realized there was nothing left to say. Walking to his partner, Steve took Bucky’s arm and lead him to the center of the dungeon set where the camera was set up for a wide shot. Then he walked out of the camera’s line of sight, pulled open his robe, and let it fall to the floor. When he turned around, Bucky’s face finally held an expression and one Steve could easily read: desire. He was drinking Steve in, his gaze lingering on his chest, sliding down his abs, and fixing on his groin.

Steve’s throat went dry and he had to lick his lips.

“Going to get undressed there, big guy?”

Scowling, Bucky shook his head.

“Tony said it wasn’t required.”

“All right,” Steve said slowly.

Great, just great. 

Taking another deep breath, Steve walked back into frame and sank gracefully to his knees before Bucky. He heard the man’s breath catch, but didn’t look up, keeping his head bowed as he held out his collar. Steve meant to say something, to ask Bucky to make Steve his. Something provocative for the viewers, but his throat was too tight, his mind still playing over the way Bucky had looked at him. Like he actually wanted him. Like this wasn’t just another job.

Bucky’s fingers brushed Steve’s palms as he took the collar and now Steve’s breath stuttered. This moment was always one of his favorites and this time didn’t disappoint. Bucky put his hand on Steve’s shoulder. It was big, warm, with faint callouses. Bucky said nothing, and the tension in Steve’s body grew. It wasn’t outside of the agreed scenario, but the pause felt heavy. The weight of the hand of his shoulder made Steve focus on it, made him briefly forget what it was they were doing here. He realised he was unconsciously holding his breath and let it out, forcing himself to relax and only then felt Bucky move. Like he had been waiting for Steve to give that little bit.

Slowly Bucky walked behind Steve and slipped the collar under his chin, wrapped it snug about his throat, and locked in place. Taking possession of Steve, making Steve his, and Steve’s cock swelled, then grew as Bucky’s fingers lingered on his nape, slipping over his shoulders and squeezing gently.

“Stand up.”

There was no shyness to his command. The words were clear, heavy, and said with a clear expectation of Steve obeying, as if there just wasn't any other way, and Steve thought that it would sound really nice on the voice over.

Steve rose back to his feet and shivered as Bucky’s hands brushed his hips. Hovering, not quite touching, as he guided Steve beneath the pulley. When they did touch, they were strong and sure as they slipped up his sides over his ribs until he took his elbows, pulling his hands above his head. 

“Hold still.”

“Yes, sir,” Steve breathed, remembering to speak this time. 

The hands on his arms tightened and Bucky leaned closer, his lips brushing Steve’s neck, just beneath the collar, and made him shudder. The heat of his hands and lips lingered as he left Steve with his arms in the air, retrieving the rope and spreader bar before returning. He stood in front of him, staring calmly into Steve’s eyes as he wound the rope around his wrists, looping, knotting, only glancing up on occasion. The display of competency went right to Steve’s cock, making it throb and lengthen just a bit further.

Bucky tossed the rope over the pulley, caught the end, and ordered, “Kneel.”

Shivering, Steve slipped into position, then gasped as Bucky gave a pull on the rope. His hands stretched over his head, his entire body straining to compensate. Not painfully, but just enough that Steve knew he would be aching soon enough. He held Steve like that for a long moment, making his muscles tense and stand out, before he abruptly released the slack.

Doling out just enough rope so that Bucky could kneel, too, he knelt between Steve’s legs. The spreader bar was locked open and placed between his legs, on the back of his knees, and Bucky took hold of his thighs, spreading his legs instead of ordering him to do it himself. It made it hard to breathe, to be manhandled that way, and soon Steve was panting, legs spread wide as Bucky used shorter lengths of rope to bind each end of the bar to his thighs. Steve had expected it to be his ankles, but he wasn’t complaining. He felt all the more exposed this way and, truthfully, the bar would be less in Bucky’s way at his knees.

Strong, calloused hands slid up the insides of Steve’s thighs, skimming over his ass and something pressed against the plug in his ass. It was black and thick enough it had taken some doing to work up to it, but it was necessary if he was to be ready for the anal hook. Shuddering hard, Steve groaned and pressed back. The moment he made the sound, Bucky pulled on the rope, turning the sound into a cry as he was stretched again, wobbling as he tried to find his balance.

Only he couldn’t. Bucky grabbed the spreader back and lifted, raising Steve’s ankles into the air and forcing him to balance completely on his knees. The sound of rope rubbing against rope, of knots being tied, clued Steve in to what Bucky was doing. Tying his wrists, over the pulley, then to the spreader bar. At best, he would have precarious balance, something easily displaced, leaving Steve with no leverage. No control.

The panic set in all at once, making it hard to breathe, making his heart race. This wasn’t the plan, wasn’t in the script. He hadn’t _agreed_ to this. They hadn’t _discussed_ this. It wasn’t right, it wasn’t right at all.

“Apple pie!”

Honestly, Steve didn’t expect Bucky to stop. Everything felt so out of control, he thought it would continue to spiral. If he hadn’t been so panicked, he would have felt the shift in Bucky. As it was, he only knew Bucky was taking him down when his balance righted itself. Bucky’s arms around him, holding him steady, fingers yanking at the knots, pulling them free. The restraints falling from Steve even as he realized Bucky had been talking.

“I’m sorry,” Bucky had said, “I’m so sorry. I won’t touch you again, just let me get you down.”

Bucky set him on the floor and Steve found he was shaking even has he finally processed the words. Despite not sticking to the the script, Bucky was so gentle as he helped Steve to the ground, not once yanking on him even as he rushed to take off the restraints. The second they were off, he was across the room, yanking the bedspread off the other set and returning to Steve to wrap him in the blanket. He didn’t meet Steve’s gaze, but he swung the fabric over his shoulders, tightening it so Steve felt cocooned, warm, and held. It helped his breathing to even, to slow, even as Bucky walked away again to the fridge. He returned with a bottle of water, offering it to Steve from as far away as he could get. 

Tentatively, Steve took it. He was shocked by how…hurt Bucky looked. How dejected. Steve knew it was rough having your sub panic after safewording, but this seemed so much deeper. The man was doing everything Steve needed despite having gone off script, exactly as he’d requested when they were done.

“You went off script,” Steve said thickly.

“I…” Bucky looked away. “I thought you wanted… Nevermind, I’ll go, as soon as you’re okay. I won’t touch you.”

Licking his lips, Steve stared at his partner who was staying because Steve hated to be alone afterward - hated to feel abandoned - but this wasn’t sub drop. This was just a panic attack and Steve’s hands had already stopped shaking. Yet, Bucky was taking such good care of him.

“You went off script,” Steve said again. “Why? What did you think I wanted?”

Bucky’s eyes, a striking grey, finally met Steve’s. 

“I just thought you wanted…more. To have me take control.”

Swallowing, Steve set down the bottle of water and reached for Bucky’s hand. This wasn’t about having fun, it was business, but if it had been about fun, that’s exactly what Steve would have wanted. To be helpless. To be at Bucky’s mercy, to let him make Steve really feel vulnerable, exposed, as Bucky enjoyed him.

“You can’t go off script, Buck,” Steve said quietly. “Maybe I would have, I probably would have, but we don’t exactly know each other that well. We gotta be on the same page.”

Bucky glanced downward.

“I didn’t...mean to scare you.”

“I know,” Steve assured, squeezing Bucky’s hand just a little tighter and letting go. “You’re not much for talking, are you?”

Still avoiding his gaze, Bucky shook his head and Steve smiled. Dropping Bucky’s hand, he stood, keeping the blanket around him. Bucky looked up, following Steve as he walked to the cameras and shut them off. His gaze was wary as Steve came back, then widened as he dropped the blanket so it pooled around his feet. They climbed Steve’s body searchingly, and while Steve knew he looked good - he put a _lot_ of effort into looking good - no one had ever quite looked at him like that. Like he was a gift.

Sinking back to his knees before Bucky, Steve took Bucky’s hands and wrapped them about his collared throat. 

“What…?” Bucky asked weakly.

“I’m not sure we started this right,” Steve answered the unspoken question, his hands still holding Bucky’s to his neck. “We should have started by building trust, by talking, but I was angry and you… Well,” Steve smiled and saw Bucky’s lips twitch. Little by little he lowered his hands and couldn’t help but smile broader as Bucky held on. “You don’t wanna talk, okay, but you _gotta_ follow the rules, okay? You wanna try something, run it by me. I get the feeling you don’t want to hurt me.”

“Not my thing,” Bucky confirmed.

Turning his head, Steve nuzzled into Bucky’s palm. 

“That’s okay. This is as much about me as it is about you. Let’s just keep it simple. Just you and me, no cameras, and,” Steve stopped as Bucky’s hands tightened. Not much, but enough to make his heart pound, his eyes slip closed, and his lips parted on a soft moan. “Yeah, now just slow down, cowboy. We got rules to set up. That’s how this works, all right?”

“All right,” Bucky said, his voice low and rich.

“No toys,” Steve murmured, “no ropes, and what do you want to do with me?”

Bucky’s thumbs slipped beneath the collar, caressing his skin beneath the leather.

“Why are you doing this?”

Eyes flicking open, Steve raised an eyebrow.

“I like sex,” he said plainly, “That’s how I got into this. I think I’d really like sex with you, so we build some trust, then get back to work, and we do it while having some fun.”

“Why?” Bucky asked again.

Steve smiled.

“I like how you look at me.”

Licking his lips, Bucky pulled his fingers free and slid his hands down to Steve’s shoulders.

“Tell me your rules.”

“Let’s talk about it less as rules, more as things I like. Things you like. I like being touched, I like my master to have me please him, I like -”

“Being looked at,” Bucky said, “Being helpless.”

“Yeah,” Steve breathed. “How do you know that?”

“You said,” Bucky answered. “And I just…could tell. When you were up there, you wanted more. You wanted…vulnerability.”

“Yeah,” Steve swallowed, feeling his muscles contract beneath Bucky’s hands. “What do you like?”

“Submission.” He hesitated, looking for the right words. “I wanted you vulnerable, too,” Bucky admitted. He ran his thumbs up Steve’s neck, to his adam's apple and pressed lightly. It didn't hurt, but it was dominant and possessive; a reminder of who was in power here. “Wrecked for my pleasure, tired… fragile.”

Steve could feel his heart pounding and, even though he was recently terrified, his cock was now filling right back up. The way Bucky looked at him, touched him with complete control, gentle, yet _owning_ him with every brush and squeeze was tripping Steve’s buttons one after the other. Bucky's eyes were bright and focused as he looked at Steve as if he wanted to take him apart, and Steve thought he wanted it too.

“No pain this time,” Steve said. “I don’t like gags, or being left alone. You remember the aftercare from the script pretty well since you went right for the blanket and water.”

“And I can…?”

Bucky’s eyes flicked downward and Steve chuckled.

“Yes, you _can_.”

“It wasn’t in the script.”

“This isn’t about the script,” Steve said. “It’s not about business. It’s about us. If you want it, I’d like you to.”

“Okay,” Bucky said, voice thick. “If you’re sure.”

“I’m sure,” Steve answered, feeling excitement buzz in his body. “Very sure.”

\----

Bucky stared at the man kneeling in front of him, at all the golden skin and perfectly defined muscles, the easy openness to him, and could hardly wrap his mind around the fact that he could actually have this, have this man, his submission for his pleasure, if only for a moment. When Steve had safe-worded so soon in their scene, Bucky was sure he had fucked it up badly again. He had been certain he would be asked to leave and never come back. Yet here he was, allowed to touch, to have more than originally offered. More, and all his. No cameras, no viewers Steve was performing for just him. 

Steve held still as Bucky ran his fingers down Steve’s shoulders, leaning a little towards Steve, looking at his lips. Though Steve didn't pull away, there was a microscopic tightening at the corners of his lips and Bucky quickly changed his movement, scraping his stubble over Steve’s jaw and pressing his lips to Steve’s ear. 

“I’m going to touch you,” he whispered, hands slidings down Steve’s arms. “Don’t make a sound.”

Placing both hands on Steve’s stomach, feeling it warm and twitching under his hands, he flattened his palms over the soft skin and dragged them slowly towards Steve’s chest, watching Steve's eyes, the way his pupils were slowly dilating, his breath coming harder, faster. Once he felt the hard nubs of Steve’s nipples, he caught them between his fingers and pinched gently. Steve twitched, breath hitching, and Bucky rubbed them between his thumb and forefinger, not pinching hard enough to twist. Then he tugged lightly, watching as they reddened, sensitive and now truly standing out against Steve’s chest. He thought about doing this long enough to make them puffy, so extra-sensitive Steve would have to fight not to make a sound at the barest of touches, but Steve had said no pain, and this was skirting the line too much as it was.

Letting go, Bucky took hold of Steve’s hips and slid his hands down to those wonderfully strong thighs, feeling the slight tension in his muscles. His right hand moved between Steve’s legs, not once lifting from his skin, until he had Steve’s balls in his hand. He cupped them, watching and waiting for a reaction as he rolled the vulnerable, smooth, shaved skin in his palm. 

Steve opened his mouth and inhaled, but remained as quiet as he had asked.

Licking his lips, Bucky let go of the tender flesh and wrapped his hand around the hard cock that had held his attention for a long time. It was so hot, almost fully erect now, the head a darker pink and just starting to glisten at the slit. Keeping his hand wrapped around the nice thick base, he rubbed his thumb in hard circles over the exposed head, against the glans repeatedly. Still Steve made no sound, though his pulse began to rise, the blue of his eyes nearly lost in the black. He swallowed hard once, twice, and shuddered under Bucky’s hand.

“You look really good like this,” Bucky mused slowly, his thumb still rubbing at Steve’s glans. 

There was a flush rising slowly on Steve’s cheeks and it darkened at the praise, Steve’s eyes flicking closed, and he tilted ever so slightly toward Bucky. He liked the way Steve was already breathing deeper, obviously in the grip of pleasure, and thought he would love to make him wait, tease him thoroughly before letting him come. Maybe he would make Steve earn the privilege. Steve’s body was so expressive, so easy to read, and Bucky was sure he could make him wait, take the chance of coming away from him whenever he wanted, but the last time he had done what he thought was okay hadn’t turned out very well. Denying Steve was a lot like going off script. Steve had said they had to be on the same page, and they hadn’t discussed it. Bucky really didn’t want to fuck it up a second time. He was expected to be the one in control here, be the one to take the action yet he couldn’t just do whatever he wanted. Steve was trusting him, was testing him in a way.

“I want,” Bucky swallowed nervously as Steve’s eyes flicked open immediately, so dark and yet bright. Staring right through him. “I want to make you come,” Bucky murmured, unable to make his request louder, “but I want you to earn it; to be good for me. Do you want that, Steve? You can answer.” He stopped rubbing Steve’s cockhead for a second, but didn’t let go of his cock, enjoying the contact.

“Please, sir,” Steve practically moaned, swaying forward enough that Bucky lifted the hand on his thigh to curl about his hip, holding him steady. “Please, I’ll be good.”

“You won’t come until I’m satisfied,” Bucky clarified, his heart pounding at the thought he would be allowed this, too.

“I won’t,” Steve agreed, “not until you say, sir.”

A sharp lick of heat pulsed down Bucky’s belly, settling in his cock, rendering him blindingly hard in just a moment. He exhaled, grateful for the fact he was fully dressed so Steve couldn’t see just how affected he was by that simple title. He let go of Steve’s cock completely and got up in one smooth movement, enjoying the way his muscles pulled, taking his mind off his throbbing cock. He walked away from Steve, to the back wall of the makeshift studio. Though he wondered what was in the drawers, he was focused on the chairs. Several hard, sturdy wooden things stacked neatly that fit Bucky’s needs just right. He pulled one down, set it facing Steve, and sat down, grateful for the fact that his jeans were on the loose side, bunching up around his groin and disguising his bulge. Later, when he’d put Steve through his paces, he’d show him just how hot he was making Bucky feel.

“Your tits,” Bucky said loudly, the crass word echoing in the otherwise quiet basement and making Steve jump with the suddenness, “show them to me. Stay on you knees”

Though Steve blinked slowly, he paused only a moment before cupping his chest, arching his back, and pushing his pecs up with his hands.

“Like this, sir?” Steve asked quietly.

“Make me want to fuck them, put my cock between them, and shoot my come all over them.”

Steve’s blush darkened, his eyes dropping to Bucky’s feet, but there was no hesitation this time. He pushed the bulging muscles together, pulling his shoulders back, forming a deep V of cleavage between the solid muscle. Leaning forward, he arched even further, making his chest stand out even more.

“Very nice,” Bucky hummed, pleased with the sight and how eager Steve was to show off his body for him.

“I think your ass also deserves some attention,” Bucky said, shifting so his legs splayed open. “Turn around, spread your knees as far as you can, and show me that sweet ass of yours.”

Still on his knees, Steve shuffled around, bent forward and then spread his legs. His slid low, startling Bucky with how flexible he was as he spread his legs so far his cock was all but lying on the floor now, so very hard, and his balls tight. This was definitely getting Steve off, which made something hot curl in Bucky’s stomach.

“Spread your cheeks,” Bucky ordered, hoping to find a position that would make Steve struggle, would make him tremble with effort. 

Exhaling loudly, Steve reached both his hands behind him, his chest inches from the floor, as he grabbed two handfuls of his own ass and spread apart his tight cheeks to show Bucky the black hilt of the plug so snug inside him. He didn’t twist to look back at Bucky, but held himself there, legs spread so damned far apart, balance precarious as he leaned forward. A little too far, and he’d fall on his face.

“Very good,” Bucky praised, making his voice low, but loud enough to carry. “Hold it.”

Though Steve whined quietly, he froze in place, legs and ass spread, all but ready for Bucky to just lean in and have his way with him. And Bucky realized he could. Steve had agreed to that, wouldn’t move if Bucky yanked the plug out and slammed himself home.

“You look so good now,” Bucky said, running his hands over his own thighs just to feel something. “Good enough to fuck.” He breathed slowly, deeply, trying to control his hunger. “I could get up and go over to you, play with the plug, maybe pull it out, and replace it with my fingers.” Steve was trembling now, his thighs flexing and twitching as he strained to hold the position. “I bet you’ll be so hot inside. I wonder though,” he was speaking slowly, stretching out the time, waiting for Steve to really start struggling, “will you be loose around my fingers, or tight as hell?” 

Steve’s fingers were clenched so tightly on his cheeks they were leaving little white marks on his skin that Bucky ached to lick.

“Or maybe I’ll just put my cock inside you and fuck you like this, making you hold that position throughout. It’s a tempting thought.” Steve moaned at the last suggestion, clearly tempted as well. “You like it? The idea of me just pushing my cock inside that hot, tight hole and fucking you while you strain to keep this position, not letting a single finger slip?”

“Yes, sir,” Steve moaned, quiet and breathless.

“It could take my time; your thighs would burn with the strain, your shoulders ache for hours afterwards… But you’re doing so well now, Steve, so eager, all spread out for me.”

Unable to _not_ touch Steve any more, Bucky stood up. He thought he might have liked to tie Steve up, to make him strain in the anal hook or put clamps on him and attach weights to them, then have Steve walk all over the room. He wanted to hear Steve moan and beg, whimper and cry out. He wanted to know all the sounds Steve could make, wanted to be the one to make them happen.

“I’m going to touch you now,” Bucky warned making his boots thump on the ground extra hard so he didn’t startle Steve. He had no desire for Steve to actually fall on his face. ”Hold this position,” he instructed as he crouched behind Steve. “You have been very good for me, Steve; you can make as much noise as you want from now on.” 

A burst of air left Steve’s lungs as he gasped, then blurted, “Thank you, sir.”

Pressing his lips together to hold back a moan, Bucky reached between Steve’s legs and took hold of his dripping cock. The head was so wet, sliding slickly over his palm as he curled his fingers tighter around it and gave a long, slow stroke, making the glans rub against his calloused palm.

Steve shuddered and moaned, head bowing forward as his entire body began to shake.

“You are so hard,” Bucky murmured, pleased and awed at Steve’s willing submission, it made his chest hurt, “Already a bit wet.” He stroked that wonderfully thick cock again. “I could spend an hour here, just pulling at your cock,” Steve let out a quiet sob of breath, “stroking it, rubbing all that precome around the head.” 

Bucky demonstrated, rubbing his palm about the tip and massaging firmly, making Steve gasp, tremble, and his hands slipped from his ass. He scrambled to grab hold again, pulling even tighter at his cheeks. 

“Ah,” Bucky said and enjoyed the way Steve all but flinched from that one word. He said nothing more, just got up and started walking back to the chair he had abandoned before, making sure to walk very quietly, making no sound.

“I’m sorry, sir,” Steve murmured, not having moved, corded muscles straining to keep him upright.

Bucky held his silence a little longer, settling into the chair and sliding low in it, spreading his legs.

“Do you want to make it up to me?” he asked finally.

“Yes, sir,” Steve begged. “ _Please_ , sir.”

“Let go and face me. Remain on your knees.”

Steve scrambled to obey, slipping from his position and turning about. Head bowed, he faced Bucky, but didn’t look up at him. He was chewing on his lip, sweat beading on his skin, and his cock bobbed as he settled again. Despite being freed from the position, his chest still heaved, muscles bunching and flexing beneath his pale skin.

Bucky spread the palms of his hands over his thighs, pulling his jeans tight over his groin.

“You are beautiful,” he praised. “You showed me your body so prettily. Look how hard you made me, Steve.” 

Bucky framed the bulge in his jeans with his hand and smiled as Steve’s head snapped up, staring hard enough that Bucky felt he could feel it despite his clothes. When Steve licked his lips, it was all he could do not to moan, pressing down on his cock instead. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d wanted someone this much.

“Crawl over here and you can make it up to me,” Bucky assured.

There was no hesitation. Steve dropped to his hands and crawled quickly across the distance that separated them, stopping at Bucky’s feet. He didn’t touch, but stopped, still crouched forward, but looking up at Bucky pleadingly, desperately. It made Bucky’s mouth dry.

“Open my pants. Take my cock out.” Bucky watched Steve lift his arms and shook his head. “No hands.”

Steve froze, then dropped his hands to his lap. Lifting himself onto his knees, he tentatively leaned his hands on Bucky’s knees, watching for rebuke, and then leaned over Bucky’s lap when none was forthcoming. Bucky held still as Steve nosed under his shirt, took his waistband between his teeth and pulled, then took more in his mouth. A look of fierce concentration passed over Steve’s face, and a moment later the button on Bucky’s jeans popped free. Bucky couldn’t stop a moan at that, realizing Steve had opened it with his tongue. Steve didn’t stop there, nuzzling into the zipper, pressing against his cock, until his teeth fitted over the tab. Pulling, he slid down, taking the tab with him, and Bucky felt his breath catch as those blue eyes met his own. Steve _wanted_ this; wanted to please him.

When Steve’s gaze fell back to his pants, he moaned loudly when he saw that Bucky had on no underwear beneath his black jeans. Eagerly, he nosed back into Bucky’s groin, pushing aside the open flaps of material until they were parted for his cock, standing hard and dark purple in the air.

“Oh, please, sir,” Steve moaned, “Can I?”

“You did well, Steve,” Bucky praised as he tangled his fingers into the short blond hair that was as soft as it looked, “but no.” 

Using the grip on Steve’s hair, he pulled his head up, then tightened his hand to keep Steve exactly where he wanted him. Steve didn’t fight, looking up at him, only watching as Bucky wrapped his other hand around his aching cock, gripping firmly just under the head so that it pointed straight up. Licking his lips, he continued to use the grip on Steve’s hair to guide him back down, pressing his face against the head of his cock. Slowly, he made Steve rub his face all over his cock. Bucky pressed it against his cheeks, over Steve’s slightly parted lips, feeling the hot, moist breath against him. He even made Steve rub his cock against his forehead, spreading Bucky’s precome all over his skin and feeling Steve tremble in his grip.

“You are so good for me Steve,” Bucky rasped out, dizzy with pleasure. “You obey so sweetly.” Again he rubbed his dick over Steve’s lips, smearing precome in thick, wet lines. “Do you still want to suck me?”

“Yes,” Steve answered instantly. “Oh, please, sir. Let me?”

“Go ahead then,” Bucky said taking his hand away from Steve’s head.

Moaning, Steve buried his face next to Bucky’s cock in the curls framing his shaft. He inhaled, shocking Bucky with how intimate it felt. It was only a moment, Steve letting himself indulge before he sat up and practically inhaled Bucky’s cock. Another surprise, on the heels of the last, made Bucky yelp again. When he looked down, though, the wicked look in Steve’s eyes said he’d done it on purpose, taken Bucky all the way to his fingers in one swallow, because he could.

“Jesus,” Bucky gasped.

Eyes twinkling, Steve pulled off, lathed Bucky’s entire head with his tongue, then slowly sank down onto him again. Closing his eyes, Steve moaned, clearly enjoying this almost as much as Bucky. Though he held his cock steady for Steve, all Bucky could do was watch the blond head in his lap, the way it bobbed, the way the warm breath fanned over his groin. He shivered from the damp heat, and exhaled a shuddering breath, caressing Steve’s head, petting the fine, soft hair, and felt Steve arch to push into his touch.

Bucky wanted to fuck him; wanted it so badly he could taste it. But he also wanted Steve shiverry, overstimulated, and dazed even more. The conflicting desires were tearing him apart and the stimulation wasn’t helping him him decide. 

Tangling his fingers into Steve’s hair, Bucky pulled him off his cock. Though he whined, Steve went, lips red and swollen, face still sticky from Bucky’s precome.

“I want to make you come,” Bucky declared, his throat dry and voice raspier than ever. “And when you are spent and soft, I want to put my cock inside you and fuck you very slowly. Make you feel every inch so you can focus only on my cock. No distractions, not even of your own hard cock. Do you want that, Steve? You want me to use you after you’ve come?”

Breathing hard, Steve watched him, eyes searching Bucky’s. To Bucky’s surprise, he didn’t immediately answer, but it wasn’t because he hadn’t heard or misunderstood. He was actually weighing if he wanted it, not just giving in to Bucky’s desire, and that was oddly reassuring.

“Yes, sir,” Steve said softly. 

Bucky ran his hand gently over the back of Steve’s head, struggling for the words to reassure Steve that he could back out anytime and Bucky wouldn’t be angry. He was already so blown away by how good Steve was, how perfect, and he wanted to make sure Steve knew that too.

“You are so good, so beautiful,” Bucky whispered. “So sexy.” He stroked Steve’s hair again. “You obeyed so perfectly, Steve. If it’s too much, I won’t be angry.”

Eyes blinking rapidly, face suddenly slack with surprise, Steve recovered only to lower his head and press his cheek to Bucky’s thigh.

“Please, sir,” Steve said louder, “I want you to use me. I’m here for your pleasure, sir. Please.” Bucky’s breath stuttered at the naked submission in Steve’s voice, the way his eyes had darkened and his lips remained parted on a shuddery exhale. “Please use me as you wish, sir,” Steve said again. “Show me how you own me.”

Bucky huffed out an incredulous half-laugh. 

“You can’t push me like that, Steve,” he murmured. “The things I want to do to you.” He swallowed. “So many, Steve,” he murmured, mind whirling with images, fantasies, each dirtier than the previous one. Steve wrecked, crying and whining for Bucky. “You are a gift, so beautiful, so obedient, so perfect for me.”

Steve blushed, looking up at Bucky through his long eyelashes.

“We can talk about all those things later. Right now,” Steve nuzzled against Bucky’s thigh, “you have plans for me, sir. Plans to make your cock all I can think about.”

Bucky huffed out a laugh.

“So cheeky,” he admonished gently. “I will have to correct that unruly streak of yours,” he promised, then cleared his throat. “So, um, protection?”

The look of sheer gratitude on Steve’s face at the question made Bucky feel a lot less silly for asking.

“May I go get some, sir?” Steve asked.

Bucky nodded and Steve stood, cock bobbing and leading the way as he went to the back wall, dug into a drawer, and came back with a little foil packet. When he held it out to Bucky, he shook his head and leaned back in the chair.

“Put it on me,” he ordered.

Returning to his knees, Steve put the foil packet in his mouth and tore it open. Bucky watched, enjoying himself, as Steve unwrapped the already pre-lubed condom. He made sure to breathe slowly and deeply, keeping still as the condom was gently rolled on to his cock, smoothed down with warm, strong fingers, and nestled into place.

“Up,” Bucky instructed. “On my lap.”

In a heartbeat, Steve was on his feet and then slinging his leg over Bucky’s knees to straddle his thighs. Bucky put his hands on Steve’s hips, stilling him, making him stand with his legs spread out awkwardly, hovering right over Bucky’s cock. 

“Don’t move,” he instructed and let his fingers slide over the stunningly perky buttocks to the small, hard surface of the plug inside him. He gave it a tiny tug and Steve moaned, his cock jerking, so close to Bucky’s face he could smell it.

“You can come when my cock’s inside you,” Bucky promised then bent his head enough to catch the head of Steve’s cock in his mouth, sucking gently as he slowly pulled the toy free. Steve shouted, his hands flying to Bucky’s shoulders and clenching down hard. Tossing the black silicone away, Bucky pushed two of his fingers past Steve’s rim, while with his mouth he sucked hard. Steve was twitching, trying to hold still as Bucky fingered him as quick as he dared. In moments he added a third finger, just to make sure Steve was stretched enough to take him. He was; loose and slippery, prepared long before Bucky had arrived.

Head tossed back, Steve was moaning as Bucky fingered him, flushed right down to his chest. When Bucky had removed his mouth, he saw Steve’s cock was now an angry red, slapping against Steve’s abs with each deep, shuddery breath he took. Taking a moment, Bucky admired the way the defined muscles of his abs delineated sharply on each inhale.

“Sink down on my cock now,” Bucky said, and watched as Steve tried to get ahold of himself. Bucky reached between their legs, taking hold of his own cock again, hissing a little at how good his grip felt, and held it steady for Steve. With his other hand, he gripped Steve’s hip and told him harshly, “Now,” his voice tight and low.

Lifting his head, Steve bent his legs, slowly lowering himself until Bucky’s head pressed between his legs. Together they shifted until the tip pressed against Steve’s entrance, and then Steve sat down. The hands on Bucky’s shoulders tightened further, nails digging into skin, and Steve cried out, head tipped back again so that Bucky could see the long line of his throat wrapped with the black leather collar. Steve wasn’t the only one strongly affected. Bucky clenched his teeth at how stunningly good it felt to have that tight, wet, hot ass sink slowly onto his cock. Steve was so slick as he sank lower, taking Bucky in slowly and surely, until his ass was resting on Bucky’s legs. He was tensing, his muscles fluttering around Bucky like the tightest of gloves as he whimpered and moaned, rocking until Bucky was as deeply sheathed as he could be.

“You feel so good,” Bucky praised, his own breath shuddering out of his chest unevenly.

“Oh, god, so do you,” Steve moaned, “So good, sir. Stretching me so full. F-fuck…”

“I want to watch you make yourself feel good,” Bucky groaned. “Touch you cock, jerk yourself off. Make yourself come while I watch with my cock inside you.”

“Yes,” Steve moaned, eyes opening again and looking straight into Bucky, “I will, sir.”

Bucky’s chest ached as Steve pulled one hand from his shoulders, wrapping it around his cock. He squeezed once, gasped and bit his lip, but didn’t look away from Bucky. There was no shame in Steve as he stroked down and up, rubbed the head, and did it again. 

“Feels good,” Steve whispered, eyes so intense, “Feels better with you inside me.”

Panting, Bucky watched as Steve’s biceps bunched as he worked, his pecs flexed with every stroke of his hand, and he licked his lips. God that chest, those tits, were driving Bucky mad. Bucky raised his hands to Steve’s chest and took hold of his budded nipples, pulling at them, making Steve moan again. He looked so good, flushed pink all over, chest heaving, biting down on his lip so hard it was white between his teeth. The muscles around Bucky’s cock were fluttering constantly as Steve strove to keep his place and jerk himself off. 

“Come for me,” Bucky said roughly, “Come on, Steve, let go.”

Bucky couldn’t find one particular place to focus his eyes. The way Steve’s lips parted on breathy moans, or the way the angry red head of his cock peeked between hands as he used them both to masturbate, or the fiery look of pleasure in Steve’s piercing gaze. Bucky hadn’t stopped teasing Steve’s nipples, flicking them and rolling between his fingers so they stood proud, the aureolas a little swollen.

“Want to,” Steve whimpered. “Oh, please; harder, sir.”

It took Bucky a moment to realize what Steve was talking about, and when he did, he couldn’t stop a groan of his own. He changed the grip he had on Steve’s nipples and twisted hard, bridging that thin line from pleasure to pain. Almost immediately he let go, rubbing the sting away, before doing it again and watching as Steve’s breathing hitched, and he shouted. His face and chest were crimson, flushed so prettily. Then Steve’s body was locking around him, squeezing down on his cock almost painfully as he came in hard pulses all over Bucky’s chest, his cock releasing out jet after jet of semen. Steve moaned brokenly. Bucky lessened the pressure on Steve’s nipples, but kept pulling and rubbing them, hoping to add that extra edge to Steve’s orgasm so it would last longer, and he could hear Steve sound like he was dying for a few seconds more.

“Sir, ah, sir,” Steve whimpered finally, still twitching but no longer coming. He slumped against Bucky’s chest and Bucky let go of the abused nubs completely to pull Steve closer, causing him to lean against Bucky’s chest. The hard, sweaty body folded into him so sweetly, Steve moaning again as the shift made him more aware the hard cock still inside him. Bucky held Steve close, chest to chest, Steve’s forehead resting on Bucky’s shoulder as he petted his back in long, easy strokes.

“You are so beautiful Steve, so good,” Bucky whispered into his ear, showering Steve with praise as he waited for him to calm down from the high of orgasm. “So perfect like this, obedient and all spread out on my cock. Nobody else like you.” Gently he ran his fingers between Steve’s cheeks and touched his rim where it was stretched around his cock. He rubbed the taut muscle, making Steve shudder and moan. “You came so beautifully, obeyed so sweetly.”

Eventually the last little shocks left Steve and he was completely relaxed in Bucky’s lap. Swallowing hard, Bucky’s hand faltered on Steve’s back as the man just…stayed there, breathing easy, cuddled against Bucky’s chest. There wasn’t an ounce of tension in Steve’s body. He merely lay still, letting Bucky hold him, trusting Bucky not to push him too far when he was so very vulnerable. It had been so long since anyone had let Bucky comfort them, just _hold_ them, that he was unable to let the moment end.

It occurred to Bucky, through the haze of arousal, that there were probably zero chances of him meeting anyone as hot or as perfect as Steve. The man was strong, strong enough to know himself and his limits, to say no, but he was _saying _yes, was rolling with Bucky’s ideas and was enjoying them. He couldn’t imagine that he could feel this way with anybody else.__

__Finally Steve sat up, his movements slow and sluggish, sated and easy. One hand on Bucky’s shoulder lifted to his lips, lazily tracing his jaw, his lips, his chin, while Steve smiled at him tender and sweet. Bucky felt his heart swell, and then Steve’s smile turned wicked. Without warning, Steve’s muscles clamped down around his cock and Bucky gasped._ _

__“More, sir,” Steve said so sweetly If Bucky hadn’t had his cock up the man’s ass he would have thought Steve was an innocent._ _

__Bucky growled under his breath, finally, finally getting what he wanted. He wrapped one of his arms around Steve’s back, the other around his thigh and lurched from the chair, bringing them both carefully to the floor. Steve’s eyes were wide, hands clinging to Bucky’s shoulders as he laid Steve down, Bucky’s cock still inside him. There was no fear in Steve’s eyes, though, just startled lust; he hadn’t expected Bucky to move so fast, or maybe hadn’t expected Bucky to be so animalistic. Either way, he clearly liked it, and Bucky shifted his grip to give himself more leverage. Then pulled out halfway, sight almost whitening out at the pure bliss of Steve’s body clutching his cock. He fucked back in deep and slow, making Steve feel every inch of him, making him moan and gasp at the slow intrusion. Bucky watched his eyes, dark and clear; his chest heaving, nipples swollen and pink; and his cock, rapidly softening, vulnerable, and spent on his belly._ _

__Gritting his teeth Bucky pulled out completely, spreading Steve’s legs so he could see his hole stretching around his cock before it popped free. His hole remained loose and gaping before slowly starting to close up. Bucky did nothing, didn’t move a muscle, just watched it, watched how wet and glistening it was, before placing the head of his cock at the entrance to Steve’s body again. Pushing in to the hilt in one long thrust, Bucky enjoyed how the sphincter clenched around him, how Steve’s walls twitched against his cock as he bottomed out. But he fell in love with the helpless gasp Steve made._ _

__“Spread your legs,” Bucky gasped out. “Keep them spread - be good for me.”_ _

__Again he pulled out completely, eliciting a gasp and hitched moan from Steve, even as he spread his legs for Bucky. He loved this; loved how Steve squirmed and twitched, tossing his head. He was probably over-sensitive right now, the bliss of his orgasm gone, leaving his pleasure near to pain. Bucky wrapped his hand around Steve’s soft cock, not trying to jerk him off, but massaging it firmly, making Steve squirm and let out breathy cries. Not once did he try to escape though, his hands firmly on Bucky’s shoulders._ _

__Bucky pressed his cock, so hard and swollen it hurt, back into the wicked heat of Steve’s body, making him arch up and sob, shaking his head hard. Steve’s eyes were tightly closed now, his hair damp with sweat, his lashes clumped together from it or tears. Bucky wanted to praise him, tell him how good he was doing, how damned good he was for Bucky, taking him, taking everything Bucky wanted to give, but he didn't have breath left. He let go of Steve’s softened cock and braced both his hands on the floor above Steve’s head. Fighting his own need to pound Steve’s ass and come in ten seconds flat, Bucky thrust in carefully and slow. He wanted this to last, wanted Steve’s moans to be etched into his memory so deeply he wouldn’t be able to forget them._ _

__He set up a slow, deep rhythm, enjoying how soft Steve was around him, how easy it was to fuck into him all the way, so deep his balls pressed against Steve’s. Each time he bottomed out, he circled his hips, just making Steve feel him, getting off on the broken little sounds Steve was making, and how hard Steve was holding onto him; fingers slipping and scratching deep furrows into Bucky’s back even through the shirt._ _

__“You are goddamned perfect,” Bucky gasped out, fucking Steve harder now, faster, unable to help himself. Each time he bottomed out Steve moaned, writhing under him, squirming and gasping, but obediently keeping his legs spread, letting his stretched hole, his soft cock, everything be exposed and Bucky’s for the taking._ _

__One thrust, two, and it was too much. Steve’s cries and whimpers were turning Bucky inside out, each thrust earning a new, strangled moan, and it was everything Bucky wanted, everything he needed, and he came, slamming as deep as he possibly could. Waves of pleasure threatened to swamp him, stronger and harder than he could ever remember, his arms trembling on either side of Steve’s head. Inside Steve, his cock throbbed, pulsed and he came into the condom. Steve whined, but finally opened his eyes, meeting Bucky’s gaze almost shyly._ _

__“Jesus,” Bucky gasped, and Steve slowly smiled._ _

__Lifting his hands, he cupped Bucky’s face between them, thumbs brushing his cheekbones, his eyebrows, his eyelids, even his lips as he came down, collected himself from the parts of the room he’d scattered to as the orgasm had exploded inside him. The touch was so gentle, it pulled him back all on its own, and soon he was reluctantly pulling free, intending to pull off the condom and get Steve bundled up._ _

__Only, Steve’s face crumpled with loss the second Bucky was out of his reach. Adjusting, he knelt again at Steve’s hip and scooped the man into his arms. He was heavy, but Bucky had little trouble lifting him and bringing him back to the blanket where they’d left it on the floor. Before he even set Steve down, he was nuzzling against Bucky’s throat, humming softly even as goosebumps raced out along his skin. This made it all the harder to gently pull him away to wrap him in the blanket. No one had ever needed him like that before, but it was obvious Steve was cold and needed the warmth._ _

__The abandoned water bottle hadn’t rolled more than a foot away from the blanket, so Bucky retrieved it and pushed it into Steve’s hand. When Bucky moved to stand, to get rid of the condom, Steve caught his arm._ _

__“Not yet,” he murmured and Bucky stilled._ _

__“Yeah,” he said slowly, “okay.”_ _

__It was a strange feeling, watching Steve uncap his water and drink, knowing he wouldn’t leave until Steve made him. Bucky just wrapped his arm around Steve’s covered shoulders and pulled him close, trying not to melt himself as Steve melted against his chest._ _


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNINGS: discussion of kinks, aftercare, discussion of consent

Tucked against Bucky’s very hard chest, Steve felt safer than he could remember. The chill that had been sliding into his limbs was already fading, and though he wasn’t shaking too badly, he knew he was slipping into sub-drop. Yet with Bucky here, holding him without him having to ask, he wasn’t worried about it. The man may have been a stranger just an hour before, but he’d proven himself attentive and considerate, not to mention strong. 

As if to prove Steve’s thoughts, his hand trembled, making the water bottle shake and slosh. Before he could spill any, Bucky’s hand covered his own, steadying him. He felt something nervous in him vanish, something that had been tight and still scared of the very large, distant and rough man he’d let into his home. 

“Shh, I’m here,” Bucky said quietly.

Bucky shifted as Steve lowered the water, inching his hands under the blanket on Steve’s shoulders. His own shoulders were broad, but Bucky’s hands were big enough his thumbs traced his collarbones, caressing his skin, until he suddenly applied pressure to where his traps and delts met. It hurt briefly, and then sent a wave of warmth down his back as his shoulders rapidly relaxed. Moaning softly in gratitude, Steve turned his face back into Bucky’s chest and sighed as Bucky continued the careful, skilled massage.

Maybe, Steve thought inanely, Bucky was a masseuse out in the normal world.

“What time is it?” Steve asked, unable to make his voice louder than a murmur.

Pausing, Bucky freed his wrist to read his watch.

“Nearly five.”

Steve groaned, slumping further against the firm, unmoving weight of Bucky.

“I need an hour, at least, to recharge. It’d be an hour after that that we finished,” he peeked up at Bucky, remembered the position he’d strained so damn hard to hold, and shook his head, “Two hours. Too long. We gotta reschedule.” Steve tried to sit up, but Bucky held him tight and he quickly gave up; he didn’t want to fight, he liked being held. “I can still pay you, though, I took your time and -”

“No,” Bucky said sharply. “I don’t want you to pay me,”

“I’m not paying you for the sex,” Steve said quickly. “I’m just going to make money off this, so you should, too, right? You agreed to it before...”

“Yes,” Bucky said, eyebrows drawn, lips turned down, “before we… Before this. After this…”

Steve stiffened, looking at Bucky searchingly as he asked, “You want me to pay you in sex?”

Bucky huffed, his eyebrows drawing even tighter together. 

“I don’t want you to pay me at all.”

“Oh,” Steve murmured, relaxing against Bucky’s chest, “Good. I mean,” he flushed and felt Bucky’s arms tighten around him, “No, yeah, good.” The huff Bucky made this time sounded a lot like a laugh and Steve weakly smacked his arm. “I’m gonna feel guilty if I’m getting paid and you’re not.”

“This… what we did, was incredible. I don’t want to involve money in it.”

Clearing his throat, feeling his face heat up, Steve pushed his hand out of his cocoon and pressed it to Bucky’s chest. He fidgeted with the man’s top, still on, weirdly enough, straightening the creases and plucking at invisible lint. Not involving money meant it wasn’t about business any more and, for the first time in a long time, Steve didn’t think that was going to be a bad thing. Not with a dom who was being so goddamned careful with him. There had been that slip, but Bucky seemed to have gotten the hint.

“Okay,” Steve said softly and then cleared his throat again, “We, um, still need to reschedule? I mean, if you’re still up for helping me out? It’s… This series is kind of a big deal for me.”

Bucky’s expression fell so fast, Steve had a heart pounding moment where he thought Bucky would refuse to continue. The last resort had _been_ Bucky. There was no one else and he couldn’t let this deal fall through, not that he knew what he was going to do if Bucky said no. Something drastic, he imagined.

“Yeah, we can reschedule,” Bucky said, voice so despondent Steve knew he hadn’t read the man wrong. 

“Do you not want to?” Steve asked helplessly.

“I will help with the series,” Bucky assured. “I want to do this with you again.”

“So what’s wr -” Steve choked back the question, pulling away from Bucky hard enough the man didn’t try to keep him in place. “Is it my work?”

Bucky frowned.

“Your work?”

“Yeah,” Steve said, voice hard as he tried to shove away his growing anxiety, “my work. My clients, virtual dominance and submission. You think it’s,” Steve threw up his hand, “wrong or whatever.”

“Steve,” Bucky said, “I don’t know enough about you work to have a proper opinion of it.”

Steve squinted at Bucky, but couldn’t see any deceit. Yet who showed up at a guy’s house to shoot porn without doing any research? How did Bucky not know what he did for a living? And if it wasn’t that, why was he pulling a face that was making Steve’s heart ache?

“If you didn’t know what I do, why did you even come here?”

“Well, I knew in general,” Bucky hedged, “but Tony said it was an emergency.”

“And you just…dropped everything and came here?” Steve pressed his hand to his forehead. “No, look, that’s not the point. If you have no opinion on my work, if you’ll keep helping me, and you don’t want more money, why do you look like I’ve kicked your puppy?”

“You’re freaking out,” Bucky said slowly.

“Yes!” Steve said a little too forcefully. “Yes, it’s…part of the whole thing. I get anxious ,and you’re upset and I don’t know why.”

“I’m not upset,” Bucky said. “I’m disappointed you’re kicking me out already, but I’ll deal with it.”

“O-oh,” Steve felt the tension drain out of him and let Bucky pull him back against his chest. “You don’t, I mean, I guess you could stay awhile? I just have a video I have to make for the website in a bit, it’s a nightly thing for subscribers.” Steve closed his eyes, relaxing as Bucky’s fingers combed through his hair. “You could help? Maybe?”

“I would like to,” Bucky said quietly.

Steve laughed.

“You don’t even know what I do.”

“Then it would be a good way for me to learn,” Bucky’s voice was getting firmer now, his confidence growing for no obvious reason.

That was true and he’d have to learn some time. The sooner the better, if this wasn’t about business. Steve’s job had burned him enough times that he was actually surprised he was even considering having a non-business relationship. He didn’t do that any more.

“I run a private website,” Steve explained, keeping his eyes closed so if this went wrong he wouldn’t have to see the disgust on Bucky’s face, “For a monthly fee, I am a virtual submissive, or dom. VIP clients pay more - a _lot_ more - so they get special services, like a monthly private video where I do something they’ve requested, if they want a submissive. The ones who need a dom get phone calls, text messages, where I tell them to do stuff. Usually not even sex stuff.”

Bucky never stopped petting him, but the motions changed to small, thoughtful movements.

“Do you ever meet your clients personally?”

“No,” Steve said immediately, “it’s all strictly virtual. It’s in the terms and conditions they agree to when they sign up.”

Bucky licked his lips.

“I would like to watch you work,“ he said, still petting Steve. “I’ve never used those sites, so I have no idea what to expect.”

“I’m not sure mine is like a lot of sites,” Steve said, ignoring the note of pride that had entered his voice. “The dom stuff is easy. I put out a new video about once a month, make some phone calls and texts every day and that’s it. The sub stuff is…difficult? Well, I have to be more creative. I run a poll three times a week where my virtual masters decide what to do to me. That’s half of what you’ll be helping me with tonight.”

“And the other half?”

“One of my VIPs sent me a gift and his request for the month is that I wear it while plugged and worshiping a dildo with my mouth.”

Bucky looked Steve in the eyes, his own silver and unreadable.

“What would you say if I was the one to plug you? Put my fingers inside you, slick you up and then put that toy inside you.” Bucky licked his lips again. “I think I would love to watch you lick a dildo while the plug I put in you is inside. Then I would have you come to me and ask very nicely to pull the plug out because I wouldn’t let you take it out by yourself.”

“You wouldn’t?” Steve asked, his voice cracking from how dry his mouth had become listening to Bucky.

“No,” Bucky said firmly, still stroking Steve’s hair. “Not until you asked very nicely, and even then I'm not sure when I would take it out. If at all.”

Steve shivered, taking a deep breath and trying to control what Bucky’s voice making promises like that was doing to him. He was still afraid that Bucky would be like all the other people who had become jealous of his work. He wouldn’t go through that again.

“And while I film?” Steve asked. “What would you do then?” 

Bucky smiled.

“Watch. Tell you what to do if there’s no sound recording. _Rate your performance_ ,” Bucky’s voice dropped. “If it’s good, I would think up a reward. If it was bad, I would devise an appropriate punishment.”

This time Steve’s shiver was harder and Bucky paused his petting before smiling at him. 

“You like that?”

“I think I do,” Steve said with a shaky nod, “a little too much. I, um… You can’t talk to me during filming. You can’t move in front of the camera when it’s on.”

“I can abide by those rules. I guess you just would have to guess how I’m finding your performance.”

Pressing his lips together, Steve rolled himself closer to Bucky, curling his legs around him. Arousal was burning in his stomach, making his body ache for something it simply wasn’t ready for. He hadn’t been this easily riled up since he first got in the scene.

“How do propose to punish me if I disappoint?”

Bucky smiled at him, a small, crooked thing.

“Wouldn’t knowing it beforehand defeat the purpose of it?”

Steve frowned, sitting up again, but staying in Bucky’s arms. Pushing the blanket off his shoulders, he let it fall about his waist as he reached out and framed Bucky’s face with his hands. The man had been so good when the camera was off, so good after, but getting him to talk was a lot like herding cats. The two images wouldn’t jive in Steve’s head: a man who knew what he was doing, but refused to do it right.

“Take my collar off, Bucky,” Steve demanded quietly, but firmly.

Bucky nodded and reached for Steve’s throat. His fingers skimmed the leather, before they caught the latch and opened it. Slowly, carefully, he pulled the collar off, setting Steve free of his role. Taking a breath, Steve felt the part of him return that he’d let go with it on. It was still there, the part that wanted Bucky to own him, control him, but he didn't have to listen to it. He touched his throat, enjoying the way the skin felt over-sensitive for a moment before he focused on the problem at hand.

Tony said his voice changed when it was off, became ‘harder’, but Steve didn’t know what the hell that meant, and anyways he tried not to listen to Tony much. 

“How do you propose to get my consent, if I don’t know what you have planned for me?” 

Bucky frowned minutely before his face cleared in a clear ‘oh’ moment.

“You’re right,” he admitted, “I can’t.”

“No, you can’t,” Steve said firmly. “Bucky, I like you. Non-business relationships aren’t really a thing for me, yet...here we are, except I can’t do this if you’re going to go off script about things you can do to me that I haven’t agreed to.”

“But I wasn’t doing anything, just talking,” Bucky protested. “Seeing if you liked the idea at all.”

Steve squinted at Bucky again, trying to figure out if he really didn’t understand, and Bucky smiled at him weakly.

“That is a really adorable expression.”

Flushing, Steve ducked his head, and shivered as Bucky took that as permission to thread his fingers through his hair again.

“I was terrified when you went off script,” Steve said quietly. “I need to know what you’re going to do because we don’t know each other that well. You don’t know what I like, what I won’t like, even just talking, I can’t choose to say yes if I don’t _know_ , and I won’t give you uninformed consent.”

Bucky pursed his lips.

“I’m sorry,” Bucky abruptly apologized. “I got carried away. I never stopped to consider how it could affect you. I don’t have much experience in this scene.”

“You don’t,” Steve said, tasting the words like they would make more sense if he could just pin down their flavor. “What do you mean? How much do you have?”

“Um,” Bucky started, and that wasn’t a good sign at all.

“Tell me you’ve been a dom before,” Steve pleaded.

“Yeah,” Bucky said quickly, “a few times. Mostly at Tony’s parties. I had a sub for a little while, but he…” Something dark flitted through Bucky’s eyes. “We didn't work out.”

“Well,” Steve said, forcing cheer into his tone, “We’re gonna work out. You know why? Because first I’m gonna kill Natasha, then I’m going to kill Tony, and then I’ll teach you how to do this properly.”

Bucky’s lips twitched.

“Please don’t. Then I’ll be out of a job.”

“You work for them?” Steve sighed, dropping his hands to Bucky’s shoulders. “Well, that explains the muscles and the poker face. The only real question I have left is if I get to see you naked.”

Bucky’s face shuttered instantly.

“Is that a requirement?”

Steve tilted his head to the side, then reached between Bucky’s legs. Slowly, he took his new lover in hand, unwrapped the condom, and tucked him back in his pants. He tossed the used protection to the stone floor all while holding Bucky’s storm filled gaze.

“In the long term? Yes. In the short term, no. I don’t think we’re ready to talk long term anyway, do you?”

Bucky was still staring at him, eyes hard. Steve had the uncomfortable thought that if he had pushed, Bucky would agree to strip even if he didn't want to, just to make up for his earlier mistakes. He had fucked up, but unlike some assholes Steve had met in his life, he wasn’t against admitting his failure and apologising for it. That went miles in Steve’s book, not to mention he just didn’t want to make Bucky suffer when it _wasn’t_ a requirement.

“I was in the military.”

Steve barely stopped himself from snorting because all of Tony’s people were ex-military. 

“I can’t tell you what I did, but it ended badly. For me. I have extensive scarring and damaged sensation. I don’t like...” Bucky hesitated, searching for words. “I don’t like being bare chested.”

“Do you shower?” Steve asked bluntly. From the surprise in Bucky’s eyes, it hadn’t been the question he’d been expecting. He scowled at Steve.

“Do I smell like I don’t shower?”

Leaning in to Bucky, Steve slid his hands down his shoulders to his chest and back up. The man took his weight easily and goddamn if that wasn’t a turn on.

“I like to shower with my partners,” Steve said, still being candid. “I like to touch, I like to _be_ touched. Anyone, really, but especially the people I’m with. There’s gonna come a time, if we’re still doing this months from now, where I’m going to want that with you.”

The corners of Bucky’s lips pulled down, but his jaw was set in a rigid expression that Steve didn’t like.

“If it’s required, I’lll do it,” Bucky said shortly and it couldn’t be more obvious that he didn't think he would enjoy a second of it. “I would like to bathe you,” he added after a moment, maybe reading Steve’s expression as well. Never being skin to skin with Bucky? He didn’t think he could stand it.

“I’d like that,” Steve said, softening his tone, leaning harder on Bucky. He smiled as that made Bucky take hold of his hips, holding him up. “You need to understand I don’t mean now, okay? I don’t mean tomorrow. Hell, I don’t mean next month, but it’s gonna have to be your call, okay? I’m never going to touch you without your permission.”

“Yes,” Bucky agreed quickly, with almost military precision.

Steve’s lips twitched. He wasn’t sure he believed it, but there was no need to force the issue. They were far from having a serious relationship, let alone talking long term commitment. Only, if it was going to be a problem, Steve didn’t even want to start this. Not when he thought he could get invested in Bucky.

“It’s not that I don’t want you to touch me at all,” Bucky said suddenly. “It’s only parts… Left side of my chest, my left arm,” Steve pulled his hand from Bucky’s left arm even as he said it, dropping it around his waist instead. “It’s okay over clothes. Just not skin to skin. I don’t want to…expose it.” 

Catching Steve’s hand, Bucky pushed it under his shirt, to his belly and pressed it there. Biting his lip, Steve pressed just a little harder, enjoying the firmness, the slight give, and how he could feel Bucky’s muscles delineating under his touch. The man’s body was clearly a work of art, scars or no scars.

“I like you touching me.”

“I like touching you,” Steve breathed, curling his hand around Bucky’s hip. The dip of his pelvis was so sharp, Steve’s breath caught, eyes fluttering and yeah, he could _not_ imagine never getting to have all of Bucky as his own

“I like manipulating your body,” Bucky said, growing bolder once more, “putting it into positions. Watching you. I like giving you pleasure. I think I would like giving you something to struggle through. Pain maybe, for the pleasure promised at the end. Pressure. I loved having you ask. Beg.” Bucky licked his lips. “I would love to punish you, what kind of punishments would be allowed?”

Steve didn’t answer. He meant to, really, but Bucky kept _talking_ and all Steve could do was stare at his lips. When he finally stopped, Steve surged the inches between them, his heart racing, his fingers digging into Bucky’s side, and kissed him for all he was worth. Bucky let out an, “Umph,” of surprise, but tightened his own hold, kissing Steve harder, hard enough he was bent backwards. His lips fit over Steve’s perfectly, parting his lips with the barest of efforts and, though Steve was the one who had initiated, Bucky was in control. His tongue swept into Steve’s mouth, twining with his own, and Steve whimpered, knowing he was lost already. 

It was Bucky who stopped them. Not abruptly but lessening the intensity, making the touch of their lips more innocent, pulling his tongue back until he was just brushing his lips over Steve’s.

“You said you have work.”

 

Steve forced his eyes open, meeting Bucky’s gaze mere inches from his own.

“You said you wouldn’t leave.”

“I won’t,” Bucky promised, then straightened up, righting Steve as well. 

“You will show me your kitchen. Then you will go take a bath while I make you something light and high in protein to eat. After you bathe, you will have a meal, do whatever hardware preparation is necessary for the filming. After that, I will show you a set of stretches, it should take no more than fifteen minutes, but should be enough to revitalise your body for a while. What video are you filming first? The one with the plug?”

Steve stared up at Bucky, more than a little stunned by the instructions.

“The last person to try to run my life ended up shot,” he warned, but could hear the lack of conviction in his own tone.

“Where?” Bucky asked matter of factly.

“The leg,” Steve admitted. “The recoil startled me.”

“Was the artery hit?”

“No.” Steve considered and added, “Sadly.”

“Doesn’t count for much then.” Bucky got up, his powerful body unfolding from his crouch with ease and taking Steve with him.

“I’m a better shot now,” Steve argued, even as he let Bucky lift him to his feet.

Bucky snorted.

“If you were shooting at me with a rifle, from a distance, I would get worried,” he paused. “Maybe.” he added. “Close range? Please.”

Huffing, Steve pulled himself from Bucky’s arm and waltzed to his robe. Picking it up, he slung it over his shoulders. Belting it about his waist, he crossed his arms and eyed the military man. The confidence pouring off Bucky was getting to him, not to mention that everything Bucky had ordered was for Steve’s benefit. He was controlling, sure, but he wasn’t being abusive. Steve well knew the difference, and he didn’t think it would hurt to listen, at least this once.

“Well, tough guy, I’m gonna do what you said, but don’t you think I can’t take care of myself.”

Bucky watched him with unreadable eyes for a moment.

“You hadn’t had a problem telling me no ‘til now,” he said carefully. “And I do listen when somebody says no.”

Tossing his head, Steve headed for the stairs.

“If you had that problem, you’d be out on your ass by now,” Steve bluffed, because they both knew Bucky could have done whatever he wanted to Steve when he was tied up. “Besides, I’m not telling you no.”

Bucky licked his lips, still watching Steve carefully.

“I noticed.”

Pausing with his foot on the lowest step, Steve looked back at Bucky.

“Well? You coming?”

Bucky huffed.

“Not for a while yet.”

Steve snorted.

“That was lame.”

Bucky hummed an agreement.

“But so true,”

“Maybe,” Steve said, holding out his hand. “Come on.”

When Bucky put his hand in his own, Steve squeezed and pulled him up the stairs. This was reckless and stupid, but for once in a long time Steve didn’t care.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNINGS: self-care, men in lingerie, lace, penis worship on a dildo, butt plug, orgasm denial, collaring, live streaming sexual acts, after care

With Bucky providing time management services, Steve not only got himself fed, clean, and then energized by the set of stretches Bucky had devised with time to spare, he also did it without stress. Bucky was so calm, so sure that the time goals he set for every task were enough, Steve couldn’t find it in himself to doubt him and worry about getting everything done. Somewhere along the dinner, a chicken salad of all things, Steve had told Bucky what kind of punishments he found acceptable: orgasm denial; spanking with a hand or flog, but not to bruising; stress positions; and being denied permission to touch, or please, Bucky. The last one he had been reluctant to offer as it pushed the line on what he allowed to happen to him, but Bucky had been so good after their session he thought he could trust him to push him that far. To deny him something that actually affected him emotionally.

Finally the only thing left to do was to get ready for the first video, the one for his VIP client. The gift box was already in the ‘bedroom’ set in the basement. This particular client liked feminization and had sent lingerie. Expensive lingerie, too. The babydoll was a hot pink affair made of fine quality cotton, the lacy bustier was smooth and soft, while the sheer fabric hanging from it was so thin Steve could see his hand through it as he lifted it from the box. Beneath was a matching pink collar with a golden D ring at the front, a medium sized plug, still in its original packaging and Steve had washed beforehand, and a lacy pink thong. There was also a large, pink dildo, one of his most popular props. It was his own and also especially requested by the client.

Steve picked the box up and turned to where Bucky was sitting in one of the chairs outside of the camera’s range, but very much in Steve’s line of sight. He brought the box to him, put it on the other chair at his side and pulled the collar out. Bucky remained sprawled in the chair as he made the preparations, watching him without a word, his grey eyes following Steve’s every move, but not betraying any emotion. His left elbow was resting on the armrest, his jaw on his folded fist. He was slouched low, legs spread out, a picture of nonchalance, and it was making something hot and eager squirm in Steve’s belly. He was already plumping a little, and they hadn’t even started the scene.

He offered the collar to Bucky.

“Will you make me yours?”

Bucky took the collar from him, his palms warm.

“Assume proper position to accept the collar,” Bucky ordered in an even, calm tone of voice that sent sharp sparks of pleasure through Steve. He sank down onto his knees gracefully between Bucky’s legs, bending his neck for Bucky. Almost instantly he felt Bucky’s fingers under his jaw, pushing his head up.

“Look at me,” Bucky said, and Steve’s eyes snapped to Bucky’s grey ones. 

Bucky pushed at Steve’s jaw a little more, making him stretch his neck up, expose all its length to Bucky’s gaze. Steve shivered at the way Bucky was positioning him, almost as an afterthought. As if it was something obvious and expected for Steve to follow the unspoken orders.

Those grey eyes stayed on his exposed throat for long moments, making Steve swallow hard before finally, _finally_ , placing the collar on him and snapping it snugly closed.

“Thank you, sir.” Steve breathed out and didn’t think he’d ever meant the words more.

Bucky touched his neck, just under the collar with his fingertips, a single point of contact between them.

“From now on, whatever you do, I will be watching you. If your performance pleases me, you will be rewarded. If it disappoints me, you will be punished. I will not interfere with the videos, but between them you have to come to me for permission to prepare for them. I will give you instructions on how to do it. Do you understand?”

“Yes, sir,” Steve answered immediately, for once not minding how eager he sounded. He was. He wanted to please Bucky.

Bucky looked away from him and reached into the box beside him to pull out the lace garment.

“Strip,” Bucky ordered, running the fine cotton between his fingers and watching Steve. Steve, who wasn’t given permission to stand up yet, quickly untied the white silk robe and shrugged his shoulders so it fell to the floor about his knees and covering his feet.

“Look at your pecs,” Bucky murmured. “They are as perky as any tits as I have ever seen. No wonder you got sent woman’s clothes.”

Biting his lips at the praise, Steve shifted, arching his back and presenting his chest so Bucky could see it even better.

“Arms up,” Bucky commanded. 

When Steve obeyed, Bucky slowly lowered the babydoll over him, first threading his arms though the sheer material, then pulling it over Steve’s head, before letting it fall down Steve’s chest. The lace bustier was clearly made for men, falling into place under the weight of the garment and cut so that it framed his chest, yet the v was deep enough that his nipples were peeking out. If he moved, they would probably be completely visible.

“So indecent,” Bucky murmured, framing his pecs with his hands and rubbing the already hardening nipples with his thumbs, sending little sparks of pleasure down Steve’s back, “but not nearly enough. It’s a VIP client. You need to be especially good to him, right?” 

“Y-yes, sir,” Steve agreed, moaning as Bucky kept rubbing his nipples. They were getting hard, sensitive, and making the previously soft lace start to feel scratchy. Steve’s cock was rapidly filling out even as his arms ached from being held in the air for so long. 

“Then I need to make sure those nipples of yours are properly visible. So that everybody can appreciate how much this is turning you on. How eager you are to dress up.”

Gasping, Steve arched into Bucky’s touch. His back was starting to hurt, but he didn’t move, holding still as Bucky teased him mercilessly. When he was squirming, his cock threatening to smear precome over the sheer fabric of the babydoll, Bucky took his hands away and sat back in the chair.

“You can put your arms down now.”

Steve dropped them, wincing a little and rubbing at his biceps.

“Thank you, sir.”

Nodding, Bucky picked up the plug. He rolled it in his hands, twisting it from one side to the other as he examined it.

“I like the size of it,” he declared finally, “Looks like it will stretch that hungry hole of yours well enough once it’s inside.” There was kind of nonchalance to Bucky like this. He seemed so relaxed, so perfectly sure of his place, of his power, it was making Steve a little dizzy with how well he was performing his role. “I know you took my cock very well just a few hours before, but I think you still need some stretching.” 

Bucky reached into his pocket for the lube packet Steve had given him earlier.

“Please sir,” Steve whispered, turned on enough he couldn’t say it louder.

Bucky pursed his lips.

“Get up. Turn around and bend over. If you want me to stretch your greedy hole, better show it to me like a proper sub should.”

How Bucky had figured out that taunting Steve with a less-than-stellar performance would make him _more_ eager to please, he didn’t know, but it was working. On his feet in a heartbeat, Steve took a step away, and bent over. He spread his legs wide, not as wide as he could, since he could do splits, but enough to lower himself nearly a foot. 

“You are not allowed to mess up the babydoll Steve, not before the filming starts,” Bucky warned, and Steve gathered the soft cloth in his hands, bunching it up, exposing his ass and lower back to Bucky. He spread his legs a little more to help balance the position, but already could feel the strain on his back and on his thighs. He was still stretched after the plug and the fucking earlier, but he wasn’t going to pass up on Bucky’s fingers inside him.

“I’m ready sir,” Steve promised, keeping the position and straining not to look back at Bucky.

The first slick finger touching his sensitive hole made him jump. He was still a little bit swollen after the rough fucking from before. Bucky circled it, making Steve moan a little before sinking the digit inside. He immediately curled down, moving, searching, until he passed over Steve’s prostate and made him jerk at the zing of pleasure.

Bucky tutted behind him.

“Stay still, this is your only warning.”

“Sorry, sir,” Steve whimpered, closing his eyes and clenching his muscles down to try and keep himself in place.

Bucky pulled out his finger and after a moment came back with two, pumping them into Steve, rubbing them deliberately over the sensitive nerve bundle he’d found earlier. Steve could feel his cock quickly harden, precome already beading on the tip, and they’d barely begun. The filming hadn’t even started and that was usually what it took to get him this worked up. It wasn’t a surprise, though, not with Bucky’s fingers working him effortlessly, making him shiver and twitch in his strained position. His hole was so sensitive, and every touch felt doubly intense.

“I’m putting in the plug now,” Bucky warned. “Once it’s in you can straighten up.” 

As he finished speaking, Steve felt the tip of the toy at his hole. Bucky didn't tease with it; he started pushing it in immediately, but he was doing it excruciatingly slowly, making Steve pant as his hole was stretched inch by inch over the girth of the toy. Once it reached its widest point, Bucky stopped moving it at all, just kept the damned thing balanced there, stretching Steve as wide as it could be, almost to the point of pain, and keeping him there for a long agonising moment. 

Letting out a sob, feeling his body ache with the strain of holding still, Bucky finally pushed in the plug all the way. Steve moaned in relief as his sphincter closed over the end, feeling the wide base press tightly over his ass.

“You look very good, all plugged up,” Bucky purred.

Steve flushed, feeling it tingle from his neck, down his chest as he straightened up.

“Turn around,” Bucky commanded again and Steve obeyed, still holding the teddy up so that it didn’t touch his already-damp cock. “Very good,” Bucky praised, looking at his exposed cock, flushed and bobbing eagerly in front of Steve eagerly. “You’re keeping the babydoll clean, you deserve a reward.”

Without warning or any kind of clue Bucky just wrapped his hand around Steve’s cock and started jerking him so hard and fast that Steve shouted, helpless against the pleasure. His shoulders curled forward, hands shaking as he clutched the fabric and had to put effort into not tearing it. Hips jerking of their own volition, Steve cried out again and then louder as Bucky took his hand away as suddenly grabbed Steve.

Almost off-handedly, Bucky said, “I saw the requests. You won’t come until you filmed your scene.”

“No, sir,” Steve agreed.

Bucky reached into the box for the last item, the pink panties made from sheer lace. He put his hands into the leg holes and stretched them wide before bending down and holding them out to Steve.

“Step in.”

Still keeping the babydoll bunched up at his waist, Steve carefully put first one foot into the leg hole then the other. He shivered as he felt Bucky pull the lacy panties up his thighs, over his ass and then over his cock. He didn't pull them all the way up though. As Steve’s hard cock was jutting up and making it hard to fit the garment properly, Bucky clucked his tongue.

“This won’t do.”

“What won’t?” Steve asked warily.

“You don’t fit, Stevie.”

The blush at the use of the nickname was so hard, Steve’s face felt swollen, and he was dizzy with the rush of blood to both ends of his body. It made him feel so delicate, though it could have been condescending. It wasn’t. It was Bucky claiming a name to call Steve that was all his own.

Bucky used one of his hands to flatten Steve’s cock to his belly, smearing the precome there, and then used the other to pull the panties over his balls and partially up his cock until the elastic band was just under the flared head. Steve looked down, a little stunned at the contrast of his dark, flushed cockhead against his pale belly, and the way the pale pink of the thong was only highlighting how hard he was.

“This works so much better,” Bucky declared. “This,” he ran the back of his index finger over Steve’s exposed glans. Up and down in a slow, thoughtful movement that pulled a strained moan from Steve. “This is for your client to enjoy, so you better present it to him right.”

Another moan escaped Steve and he felt something desperate claw at his chest.

“Please, sir,” Steve gasped, “Can I… Kiss me? If I’ve been good, will you? Please?”

Bucky tilted his head back to look up at Steve thoughtfully, his finger still running up and down over Steve’s cockhead in tiny, maddening strokes.

“Hmm, I think you are very good right now,” Bucky agreed. “Where do you want me to kiss you?”

Eyes widening, Steve wasn’t sure how to answer the question. He hadn’t known there were _options_ , he just wanted a kiss, wanted Bucky’s lips on him, wanted to be shown he’d done well. Now there were options? And Bucky still hadn’t stopped touching him, that single finger on his cock making it hard to think about anything else and the more he touched, the more Steve wanted his mouth, _anywhere_.

Bucky huffed out a tiny laugh, obviously reading Steve’s dilemma.

“There’s this prettily flushed cock, conveniently at mouth level. There are those pretty, hard nipples that I wouldn't mind putting my mouth on. And then there is your mouth, of course. So, where do you want me to kiss you as your reward?”

“My - I.” Steve took a breath, closing his eyes for a moment to force himself to decide. “My mouth,” he declared, looking down at Bucky again. “Please, sir.”

Bucky got up from the chair then, standing and moving closer to Steve.

“Remember to keep the babydoll clean, it’s for the client to enjoy,” he murmured, taking Steve’s head in his hands and kissing him. Steve melted, barely remembering the instruction as Bucky claimed his mouth, his lips, his tongue. It could have been minutes or seconds, but it felt like hours. Steve’s entire world contracted to Bucky’s lips, his kiss. _This_ was why he didn’t kiss people; he gave away too much of himself. As it was, when Bucky nipped at his lips and pulled back, Steve tried to follow and Bucky had to gently push him away.

“Steve,” Bucky said firmly, “you have a video to make.”

For the first time in years, Steve couldn’t have cared less. He wanted that mouth on him, all over him. Who cared what the clients wanted? But then he looked up at Bucky, stern and in control, and Steve whined. He wasn’t going to disappoint or disobey.

As if in response to the sound, Bucky leaned in and brushed their lips together again. Steve sighed, but went when Bucky gave him a little shove. It took the walk to the set and the camera to get his head back in order. To remember the lines he’d planned, what his client had requested, and what he usually liked. It was just difficult when work had suddenly stopped being work.

Steve went to the small camera he used for the personal videos so they seemed _more_ personal. He pressed the record button, looked at Bucky over the top, then walked to the bed. Stopping before it, he turned around and licked his lips.

“Hello, master,” Steve said to the camera, “I got your gift. Do you like it?” Holding his hands above his head, Steve did a short turn and then glanced down at the floor. For once, the shyness wasn’t feigned as he said, “I did,” and pushed up the hem of the babydoll until his hard, dripping cock could be seen above the lace panties. “A lot. I’ll wear the panties all day tomorrow like you wanted and, of course…”

Turning around, Steve bent over, leaning on the bed, with his other hand he pulled up the babydoll’s hem over his ass. The pink plug could be seen between his cheeks, but he spread them with his hands so he was sure the camera caught it. 

“It’s so big,” Steve murmured. “Filling me right up. I want to be fucked so bad, I can’t stand it.” Straightening, he turned around and picked up the six-inch dildo he’d set on the bed for this purpose. “I know; I won’t come until it’s allowed.”

Holding up the dildo, Steve slid onto the bed, and then climbed back to his knees.

“You requested I show you how I’d please you if you were here,” Steve told the camera. “I gotta admit, if you were here, I’d beg you to fuck me. Beg and beg until you had to punish me, spank my ass until it was as pink as the panties I’m wearing. Only good boys get your cock, so I’d have to prove myself then, prove I’m a good cockslut for you.”

Steve brought the toy to his lips. Holding the base with his hand, he stroked up to the top with the other and looked just past the camera at Bucky. That’s why he’d put the thing there, so he could see his real audience without looking away from the camera itself.

“I’d take you out of your pants,” Steve said, his voice husky with his very real need. “Stroke you, slow,” then demonstrated on the toy, “then lick you, just like this.”

Steve licked the toy from the base to the tip, swirled his tongue around the head and went back down. Holding Bucky’s gaze, he felt his own cock throb. This was so much more intense than imagining his client watching him. He moaned as he took the head into his mouth, slowly easing it past his lips. When it nudged the back of his throat, he swallowed and took it all the way into his throat.

Glancing at the clock, he noted the time and squirmed, wondering how he was going to get through ten minutes of sucking a dildo when the real thing was just feet away. That was what he wanted, Bucky’s cock sliding over his tongue and down his throat. He wanted Bucky’s hands in his hair, pushing him down, petting him, and the hot bitter taste of his precome. The dildo tasted of latex, was cool and wobbled, yet he wanted to give Bucky a show, show him what he’d do to _him_ if he could just crawl over there and show him just how good he could be.

The thought of pleasing Bucky made him throb in the tight panties. He could feel Bucky’s eyes on him every moment, though he could only glance over the camera at him now and then. He was once more sprawled in the chair, knees spread wide, stretching the jeans over his groin and his large bulge. He didn’t stoke himself, just watched with his head resting on his fist, elbow braced on the armrest. If it wasn’t for the clearly visible outline of his hard cock through his pants, Steve would have thought him unaffected. 

Glancing at the clock, Steve whimpered as he realized he was barely halfway done. Steve wanted to touch Bucky so badly, the very thought was making his moan. The heat low in his belly was making him squirm, his hips twitching as he tried to get some relief, some friction on his aching dick. His nipples were so hard they tinged, aching they were so sensitive. If Bucky clamped them right now, pinched them between his fingers, or bit them, Steve would probably scream.

He wasn’t aware of how loud he was moaning, how desperately he pumped his hips against the flimsy pressure of his panties until it occurred to him just how close to coming he was. His ass was clenching on the plug inside as if he hadn’t been fucked roughly just a few hours before, as if he had been left wanting and waiting for for days. Whimpering, he forced himself to stop, glancing once more at the clock and holding in his sigh of relief. 

Slowly, Steve pulled the dildo from his mouth, gave the tip a final lick, and set it on the bed. Deliberately he licked his lips and pulled up the hem of the babydoll, showing how hard he was, how his precome had smeared over the fine fabric. He would be flushed and wrecked, breath coming hard, looking desperate because he was...just not for this guy.

“I want it so bad, master,” Steve told the camera, “but I’ll be good. Thank you for giving me such pretty things, for making me behave.” It was hard to remember the script, how to please this particular client, when all he wanted to do was to go to Bucky. “I’ll make sure to keep my hole stretched and wet for you, master. Waiting for your word, for your permission.”

Sliding off the bed, Steve kept his steps even as he went to the camera to switch it off, but didn’t hide his eagerness as he turned to Bucky. He was sitting the same as he’d been this entire time, not moving, just watching Steve with those dark, unreadable eyes. They made Steve squirm, unable to tell if he’d pleased Bucky or disappointed him. 

Taking a breath to steady himself - Jesus, he was turned on - Steve sank to his knees. He wanted to go to Bucky, to touch him, sink onto his cock or take it into his mouth, but he hadn’t been told to. 

“Did I please you, sir? Was the performance good?”

Bucky got up from the chair, walking in a slow, deliberate, dangerous prowl towards Steve. He wasn’t in any hurry as he approached, rolling his shoulders as he walked, making the muscles strain at the cloth before he made his first sound in half an hour.

“Hmm.” 

It was a low kind of rumble and Steve’s breath hitched because what did it mean? Was it good? Had he been bad? Was he going to get his reward, or be punished for failing?

Steve trembled. The anticipation of not knowing always got to him. He wanted to be good, to please. Bucky licked his lips then pursed them, looking over Steve as he circled him slowly, as if Steve was some kind of sculpture on display. The tension grew and Steve had to make himself not turn and follow Bucky as he paced about him.

“I’m not sure your cock is quite wet enough,” Bucky declared finally, stopping after making a semicircle around Steve.

Steve whimpered because he was so wet his panties were all but dripping with it, dark pink where his precome had soaked into the lace.

“And I didn’t see you make much use of your tits, after I went to so much trouble to prepare them for your client.”

Steve whimpered, the trembling worse. God he was so hard and he wanted to touch, to be touched so badly and it was starting to look like he had failed. He hadn’t pleased Bucky and would be punished for it, but, if he hadn’t pleased him he deserved the punishment.

“But the way you licked at that fake cock with such dedication was truly a sight to behold,” Bucky continued making Steve glance up tentatively. As he did, Bucky stopped before him, taking his chin in hand. Steve leaned into the touch and Bucky ran his thumb over Steve’s lips. “You’ve got quite a mouth, haven’t you? I’m going to enjoy it thoroughly, but you were good, so good,” Steve shivered at the word, “you get your reward. On the bed, Stevie. On your knees and elbows. ”

“Yes, sir,” Steve breathed.

Getting back to his feet, he hurried back to the bed and crawled on, leaving only his ankles off the edge.

Bucky approached him from behind and stopped between Steve’s ankles, pants brushing his skin. He could hear the rustle of clothes and the crinkle of foil, one of the pre-lubed condoms he had given Bucky before the scene. He shivered, moaning at the way that shifted the plug inside him so it pressed against all his sensitive places. His cock was so sensitive, the previously soft lace was scratchy and maddening on his cock and his hairless balls. The contrast of the fabric and his wet cochhead that was exposed to the cool air was making him whine and present his ass obscenely toward Bucky.

“You look so good right now, the lace looking perverse on your big, manly body,” Bucky said and Steve shivered again at the praise, more warmth curling low in his belly and making his cock twitch hopefully. “But what I like the most is the plug. Your ass has been full the whole day, hasn’t it? God it looks so good stretched and filled. I should keep you stuffed day and night; the way you take it is incredible.” Bucky pulled the panties over Steve’s ass, but not lower. Just hooking the edge under the swell of Steve’s buttocks. “Since you forgot about your pretty nipples for the scene, there will be conditions on your reward.”

“Please, sir,” Steve begged, out of his mind with how much he wanted, needed Bucky to fuck him; to let him come and prove that he was good.

“I will fuck you, will pull that plug out of you real slow, and then plow your ass as hard as I can. Gonna fuck you so mercilessly you will all but choke on it, Steve.”

It was so hard to stay still, to keep from wriggling about while feeling Bucky against him. Then Bucky did as he’d promised, pulling the plug out little by little, and making Steve moan as his hole was stretched over its girth. He stopped at the widest part, forcing Steve to take the stretch and hold his position like he had when he’d put it in.

“And you can come whenever you like,” Bucky promised, “but you can only do it on my cock. No touching yourself, no jerking off, no rubbing your cock over anything. You come from being fucked, like a greedy cockslut, or you don’t come at all.” 

Wriggling, Steve made himself really feel the stretch of his ass around the plug, and nodded.

“Only on your cock,” he promised. “I need it inside me. Please, sir, fuck me. I need your cock, need to be fucked hard; used like a slut.”

“Don’t worry baby, I’ll drill you hard enough you’ll come, because you are a perfect slut for me, spreading your legs and begging for it whenever I please, right?”

“Yes, sir,” Steve moaned, closing his eyes as Bucky’s words washed over him. “I want to be your perfect slut. I wanna be so good to you.”

When Bucky took hold of Steve’s hips, his palms were hot and the grip so hard it made Steve moan and push back. Bucky’s cock, sheathed and slick with lube, pressed against his hole and then past, his hole stretching about him without any burn at all. 

“I bet you will be, I bet you will gasp and moan and come all over yourself baby.” Bucky’s voice was raspy and low and Steve clawed at the sheets as he sank deeper inside. “I bet you will make the best sounds.”

That was all warning he had as Bucky tightened his hold on his hips and started fucking Steve in earnest, going from zero to sixty in a second. The pace didn’t falter as he pulled out and slammed in so hard it pushed Steve’s breath out of him. He rocked up the bed, making involuntary cries on each fierce thrust. Bucky’s balls were slapping against his ass, the room echoing with the obscene sounds of fucking. Steve’s cock was jerking in its lace prison, twitching and swelling that little bit more as Bucky kept fucking right into his prostate, his cock heavy and big, stretching him so good, making him feel it so deep. It was all Steve could do to hold himself on his hands and knees. A cry left his lips each time, uncontrolled, breathy noises, helplessly pushed from his lungs as he was used like a slut, a fuck toy, a willing hole for whatever Bucky pleased. It was too hard to breathe, the, “Ah!” punched from his diaphragm each time Bucky thrust in, so Steve could hardly catch his breath. 

Then he heard Bucky curse behind him, one of his hands letting go of Steve’s hips and grabbing hold of the D ring at his collar, pulling, forcing Steve’s back to arch and obstructing his airflow as he used it as leverage, fucking into Steve like a jackhammer. Steve’s vision blossomed with black spots, his hands clenching in the bedding. Pleasure all but drowned him, his whole body tingling, floating, the pleasure coiling so deep, so fast inside him, he could barely hold himself up. Steve was unaware of anything but the pleasure, barely recalling his own name as Bucky’s cock pushed in and again. Every thrust was so brutal, tears were leaking from his eyes, but it was so _good_. The best he could remember. His body was at Bucky’s mercy, completely under his control like nobody had managed before him. With that realization, Steve’s orgasm crashed through him. His body clenched down so hard on Bucky’s cock he heard his dom groan as he came, his cock spurting over his belly, the babydoll, the panties, making a mess of him as he spasmed on Bucky’s cock. 

Letting go of the collar, Bucky let him breathe normally, but didn’t stop fucking him. Grabbing Steve’s hips, he thrust faster, rougher, making Steve’s cock twitch helplessly as his prostate was battered mercilessly, extending his orgasm, driving home that he was there for his dom’s pleasure, for him to use as he pleased. There would be bruises on his hips by tomorrow morning, Bucky’s fingers digging hard into his hips.

Behind him, Bucky stilled, his cock buried deep in Steve’s ass as it swelled a tiny bit more as Bucky came too. They stayed like that for long seconds, Bucky running his hands over Steve’s back, long, slow caresses that ran from the nape of Steve’s neck, to the ach of his buttocks. 

“You did so good Steve,” Bucky rasped, his cock still buried in his ass. “So very good. When I pull out, don’t move for a moment okay? Stay still for me just a little bit longer.”

Steve moaned his assent, letting his head fall, feeling his arms start to tremble with exhaustion. As he said he would, Bucky pulled out and Steve whimpered as his softening cock slipped from his abused, fucked-open hole and clenched on nothing but air.

“You are such a hot mess right now, Steve… Look so pretty.” 

Bucky rubbed Steve’s swollen hole with a finger, startling him so he jumped, whimpering with how overwhelming it was. Sliding lower, Bucky reached between Steve’s legs where his cock was swinging free of the lace panties. He ran his fingers through the come smeared over Steve’s skin before pressing his already soft cock to his belly, flattening it there and the using the other hand to pull the messy panties back the way they were with the elastic band resting just under the sensitive head of Steve’s cock. The press of the cloth was almost too much, but Bucky shushed him and pulled his hands away, taking hold of the waistband and dragging it over Steve’s cheeks.

“Like this,” Bucky murmured, stroking his ass through the lace, “All the proof of what a perfect slut you are will stay with you, the messy panties proof of what good a cockslut you are.”

Trembling, Steve murmured, “I have to be clean for the next video, sir.”

Bucky hummed.

“Then you will lie down and I will bring a warm, wet washcloth to clean you up.” Bucky trailed his hands over Steve’s back and his ass again. “But then I will put these panties back on you, because I like how they smell now,”

“Yes, sir,” Steve whispered, feeling the gratitude wash over him. He was so goddamned tired now, his arms aching, and he still had an entire scene to shoot. It wasn’t an easy one, either. 

Waiting for Bucky to take his hand away, Steve sank down onto the mattress and splayed on his stomach. His legs were half hanging off the bed, but he didn’t care.

“After you are clean and dressed in the panties again, I will spoon you, and we’ll nap for an hour because you were so good, and we still have time left before you have to start the next scene.”

“Yes, sir,” Steve murmured, his eyes already half-closed. Sleep sounded like just the thing. Behind him, he heard Bucky chuckle, then head for the stairs. Steve was asleep before the door shut.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings  
> wax play, pain play, after care, live streaming sexual acts, overstimulation

Bucky watched Steve set up for his next scene, the equipment, the props. Without having to be told, he’d kept on the lingerie and pink collar, but he’d taken out the black one and set it with the rest of what he was planning for the video. It was a live one, unlike the last. Steve had set several candles around the dungeon set, white and flickering in the lowered light. The red one was to go on his skin, the poll having finished with 30 minutes of masturbation while wearing a vibe, and torturing himself with hot wax every few minutes. Bucky wished he could drip the wax on Steve himself, but the video was live and he couldn’t be seen on screen.

When he came back to Bucky, he held out the black collar and Bucky felt a thrill run up his spine. Steve had given himself to him so sweetly all day, letting Bucky into his life, his work, instead of making him leave. Now, for the fourth time, he was giving himself to Bucky. There was no doubt he could have done this alone, he clearly had before, but he wanted Bucky here. It was almost too good to believe.

Taking the collar, Bucky watched Steve’s graceful kneel, and reached around his throat to unclasp the pink collar. Setting it aside, he wrapped his hands around Steve’s throat and felt him shudder. Lips parting, eyes closing, Steve looked to be awash in pleasure from just that touch. Experimentally, Bucky tightened his grip and Steve moaned.

“So good, Stevie,” Bucky murmured. “Tell me what you want.”

“Own me, sir,” Steve murmured. “Please…”

Bucky almost tightened his hands on Steve’s throat, but remembered they hadn’t discussed this yet at the last moment.

“Do you want to try breath play, Stevie?” Bucky asked, his thumbs rubbing up and down besides Steve’s trachea. When Steve nodded, Bucky bit back a moan. “That’s what you want, then? You want to belong to me.”

“Oh please,” Steve moaned, melting in Bucky’s hands. “Please, sir.”

Tightening his grip, Bucky took Steve’s ability to breathe. Mouth opening, Steve squeaked, but didn’t even reach up to grip at Bucky’s wrists. He just knelt there, looking into Bucky’s eyes as his face turned red and his eyes began to water. Letting go, Bucky watched him gasp for breath and felt his mouth go dry. In a moment, he had the black collar wrapped about Steve’s throat again, clasped into place, and he reached down to roll Steve’s balls in his hand through the messy, lace panties, making sure to the the inside of his forearm to rub over the exposed cockhead, still soft and exposed.

Gasping, whimpering, Steve held still as Bucky hooked his fingers under the elastic and pulled it down with one hand, making sure the lace dragged harshly over Steve’s soft cock, making him moan. Steve remained motionless, only squirming as Bucky dragged the panties over Steve’s knees, down over his shins, until he could step out of them. They were sticky and dirty, the front all damp from how long Steve had spent hard and wet in them, the back from the lube that had leaked out after Bucky had fucked him. The pink babydoll wasn’t as pristine now as it had been before, creased and soaked through from Steve’s sweat, dirty spots where it had dragged over Steve’s sticky cock during that first video. Bucky liked the look on him, all used up and disheveled, that he was a willing sex toy all but written on his body. The way he carried it, proud to be obedient, willing and perfectly submissive to Bucky’s desires was everything he had ever wanted in a sub.

Bucky bunched his fists in the thin cotton and pulled it off Steve, his sub raising his arms willingly to let him take the garment off, leaving him completely naked. He rubbed lightly over the slightly pink nipples, making Steve moan, and looked down at his soft cock. He loved it, loved how defenseless and vulnerable it looked hanging between Steve’s spread thighs. It made him want to touch Steve, give him pleasure. There was such a mean streak in Bucky. He wanted to see Steve struggle to obey, wanted him hard and aching already, sent to do his work without a shred of hope of coming, having to suffer the hot wax on his oversensitive, abused cock.

Bucky couldn’t help himself, so he reached for that soft cock again, gathering it in the palm of his hand and holding, thinking of all the things that could be put on it to make it prettier, all the rings and ribbons he could tie around it, or the things he could put inside it to make Steve gasp and moan. He would have to wait and see if Steve liked those ideas too. 

“This won't do for the scene you’re to film for your clients,” Bucky murmured, his voice low and rumbly, trying to insert as much implied menace as he could into it, just to feel Steve shiver. “They pay hard earned money for the privilege of seeing you struggling to obey their orders. It can’t be too easy, now can it?” 

“N-no, sir,” Steve gasped.

“We should make sure your cock is nice and hard then, properly sensitive for the hot wax, am I right?”

Steve shuddered, but nodded.

Bucky let go of the hold on Steve’s cock and slid his palm between Steve’s legs. He touched Steve’s hole with two of his fingers. There was so much lube in Steve it made him slick still. The rim was a little swollen, though, soft and silky beneath his fingers. His fingers slipped inside Steve easily, into the hot softness of Steve’s ass. Steve gasped and twitched as Bucky curled his fingers inside him and started rhytmically pressing at Steve’s prostate. Bucky gave him no other stimulation, just his fingers working steadily, tirelessly at Steve’s sensitive nerves.

“Ah,” Steve gasped, his fingers curling into fists and face flushing. “Ah! Sir,” Steve’s hips were making small, aborted movements in time with Bucky’s fingers curling.

“Take it, Steve, just like you took my cock so well before. Just kneel there and let me make you hard for the viewers.”

Steve moaned.

“Sir, yes. Please,” Steve gasped, throwing his head back and making tight little sounds on each press of Bucky’s fingers. It took a little time since Steve had come twice that day already, but he did get hard. Bucky watched how his pink cock became pinker, flushed, and lengthened, the slowly-hardening shaft brushing Bucky’s wrist before the cock stood out from Steve’s body by itself. Though his sub was breathing harshly, he was staring staring at Bucky with soft, adoring eyes, even as he slowly pulled his fingers out of the tight clutch of Steve’s body, provoking another gasp and shiver.

“Thank you for helping me, sir,” Steve murmured.

“You’re welcome,” Bucky said, sitting back in his chair and watching Steve try to gather himself. After a while he couldn’t help but ask. “Why wax?”

Licking his lips, Steve swayed closer to him and said, “I don’t mind a bit of pain. It…it enhances the pleasure, you know?”

“What would you do normally, after you’ve turned off the camera?”

“Fuck myself silly on a dildo,” Steve answered immediately.

“Hmm,” Bucky mused, sliding his hand up to squeeze’s Steve’s soft cock. “You sure your ass can deal with any more fucking? It’s gotten so much attention today already.”

Steve’s lips twisted wryly.

“Sex is my job, sir. I can take it.”

“Can you?” Bucky chuckled and watched Steve shiver. “Maybe you’ll put on another show for me, then, when you’re done, and only _then_ will I use your ass for my own pleasure. If you’re good.”

“I’ll be good,” Steve said immediately, and Bucky was again charmed by how _eager_ Steve was to please. He thought about the way Steve would look after this scene. His hole was already red and swollen, even gaping a bit after Bucky had had another go at it. After thirty minutes of that vibrator buzzing up inside him? He would be wrecked. Bucky was sure he wouldn't even need to stretch or lube Steve up. He would just put his cock inside Steve as if his hole was made to take his cock, for him to use. He could imagine the sounds Steve would make then, moaning, gasping, crying so sweetly. God damn it, he had just come not long ago and he was already feeling hot under his collar.

“Sir?” Steve said, interrupting Bucky’s train of thought. “It’s almost time.”

“Go,” Bucky ordered, squeezing Steve’s cock one last time, “and have fun.”

“Yes, sir,” Steve answered with a sparkling grin.

Getting back to his feet, Steve went to the stage and knelt before the camera. His eyes fixed on the clock on the wall, watching it until the clock ticked to exactly eight-thirty. Then the red light atop the camera came on and Steve looked into the lens.

“Master,” he greeted, “I’ve set everything up just like you ordered. I’m a little nervous, but,” Steve’s long lashes brushed his cheeks as he looked down. Bucky would have thought him shy if he hadn’t known better. “I want to make you happy.”

Rolling onto his knees, Steve showed his ass to the camera and spread his legs. Picking up the vibrator, he teased it between his cheeks, rubbing it over and around his hole. He moaned, then pushed it in, along with two fingers, so it was deep inside his used hole. The puffy, pink skin stretched tightly around the intrusion was in plain view, and Bucky swallowed, glad for the fact he was in the shadows. 

Turning around again, Steve sat down and leaned back, legs spread wide, feet planted firmly on the floor so his ass was exposed to the camera. 

“It’s my favorite vibe, just like you asked Master,” Steve said quietly, gaze flicking to Bucky. “I’m ready to turn it on, but I won’t come. You said I couldn’t and I have to obey, don’t I?”

Picking up the remote, he switched it on and moaned, his hips jerking involuntarily as Bucky watched. Steve stilled himself with some effort, then turned it on higher and curled forward, gasping and moaning again, the pleasure harder to ignore. Then he set the remote down, looking up at the camera with those gorgeous blue eyes as he took his cock in hand, and with the other picked up the red wax candle. 

“I’m so hard already,” Steve said, his voice trembling as he lifted the candle over his chest. He squeezed his cock, neck rolling in pleasure as he lifted the candle over his chest. “My nipples first? Oh, but they’re so sensitive.” He squeezed himself, stroking faster and shuddered violently. “Okay, I’ll do it, master.”

Tilting the candle, he let it drip onto his hard nipples and jerked with every hot drop. Crying out, he tipped it further and more spilled onto the taut nub, coating it in melted wax that dripped over the bud. He didn’t stop stroking, whimpering as he did, as the wax dried and he looked back to the camera, panting for air.

Bucky hadn’t seen anything like it and he sure as hell never thought it would make him so hot. It wasn’t the pain and pleasure itself, though he sure as hell liked that. It was watching Steve, watching him put on a show for others, and knowing in the end it would all be his. He was lending Steve to them, for this half hour where Steve would torment himself, and then he would be all Bucky’s. They only got a glimpse, an act; Bucky got the real thing.

Steve’s head fell back and he cried out as wax fell onto his other nipple. He was pulling at his cock, hips writhing, and they were barely five minutes in. God, Bucky wanted to tie him up and drip wax on Steve himself, wanted to control how much, where it fell and how hot it was. Wanted to be the one to bring pain and pleasure to Steve.

“It hurts, master,” Steve whimpered. “Oh, but I want to come so bad and we’re only just starting. I’m going to be such a mess when we’re done, aching, dying to come, just waiting for you to use me.”

The candle tilted again, spilling wax over Steve’s shoulders and between his pecs. He gasped, arching as the burn settled into his skin, and he didn’t stop, dripping more in a trail down his sternum, over his abs. His hand didn’t stop stroking, making his whimpers and moans constant, his muscles tense. Bucky kept licking his lips, breathing deep, trying to stay quiet as he watched Steve torment his own body with the wax. His cock was red and shiny, the way he pulled at it changing, adding a little twist at every upstroke. His muscles were standing out beautifully, skin beaded with sweat as he dripped more wax over his chest.

Bucky saw Steve’s eyes dart to the clock, and he was struck with how controlled his sub was even now. 

“My cock now?” Steve whimpered. “Yes, master.”

Holding the candle between his legs, he held his cock steady and tilted the red candle to the side. Fat drops of red wax landed on the shiny, dark red head and Steve shouted, his body jerking and arching back, his head thrown back. Tendons and veins stood out in sharp relief beneath his skin as he _sobbed_ in mixed pleasure and pain.

Bucky got up from the chair, something fierce and hot curling low in his belly. He was completely hard now, too, throbbing with want. The way Steve had sobbed then, the sound he made, it cracked something in Bucky, made a violent wave of heat spread out in his chest. He managed to stay quiet, years of stealth training holding as he moved soundlessly deeper into the shadows, pacing a half circle out of sight of the camera, trying to control himself.

Steve trembled, looking up at the camera with his eyes with need and a sheen of unshed tears. 

“Thank you, master,” he whispered and slowly began stroking himself again. Bucky was aware of Steve talking, his voice strained and shivery now, but he needed a moment to calm himself, to reach that space where just watching was enough. The place where his patience lay before Steve had made that sound. When he had, he turned back to Steve and stood just behind the camera. He watched Steve’s straining body, his hole stretched around the virator, his cock and balls hard and tight. There was more wax on his thighs, his abs, his chest. 

If Bucky’s sense of time was right, Steve would need to drop the wax on his cock again soon, so he made sure to catch Steve’s eye. The way he was standing meant for the viewers it would look as if Steve was looking into the camera, not at Bucky. When Steve moved the candle over his cock, watching Bucky attentively, so goddamn attentively, Bucky waited till the first drop landed on the shaft. Steve cried out, flinched, and moaned, his whole body twisting and squirming under the heat of the wax. 

When Steve opened his eyes, Bucky mouthed at him, slowly and clearly, “Again.”

“Again, master?” Steve whimpered. “Please, please…”

Bucky nodded and Steve shuddered.

“Yes, sir,” he whined and Bucky shuddered because he knew Steve was talking to him. Hand trembling, Steve titled the candle again, holding his cock steady and flushed against his stomach. He dripped the wax onto the underside of his cock, crying out and squeezing his eyes closed. Twisting, tears dripped from his eyes and Bucky wanted to grab, him, hold him, tell him he was doing so well, and then do it to him all over again.

Steve opened his eyes, flicked them towards the clock, and let out a louder sob before he looked to Bucky. More tears tracked down his cheeks as he slowly forced his hand down his cock, stroking himself, fingers sliding over hardening wax and precome-slick skin. Hands shaking, he trembled as he kept dripping wax over his thighs and hips, gasping desperately now as he stroked himself. His cock was an angry, purple-red, and his hands looked astonishingly pale against it.

Bucky watched, dropping into something strangely close to a mission mindset as he watched Steve and waited for the right time to interfere again. Almost absently he watched the splay of Steve’s legs, the way his thighs were trembling faintly with the strain of being this spread all the time. The vibe inside him was buzzing loudly, almost slipping out of him so that Steve had to reach between his legs every so often and push it back in. 

Finally, finally the last time for the wax being dripped on something sensitive came, the grand finale of the scene, and Bucky made sure to catch Steve’s eye again. His sub’s eyes were blown wide, more wrecked than ever before as he pressed his hard, flushed cock flat to his belly and tilted the candle over his balls with trembling fingers. He made a hurt, strangled sound and jerked as if electrocuted when the first drop landed, squirming and sobbing for long, long moments afterwards, all but crawling out of his skin. 

Eyelashes clumped with tears, Steve opened his stunning blue eyes and looked to Bucky, begging for direction. Bucky wanted to be nice, to be soft and comforting for Steve, but he couldn’t yet, not when he could all but smell Steve’s need. For all that Steve had said no pain at the beginning of their encounter, this pain was breaking him, making him struggle and fight. Yet his cock was rock hard and leaking. Steve, it seemed, loved to be pushed to his limits. He wanted somebody to break him and put him back together.

“It hurts, master,” Steve cried out, his voice shuddery and thready.

Clearly, slowly Bucky mouthed, “Again. The head.”

“I can’t do it,” Steve whimpered. “I can’t…”

“The head,” Bucky repeated, arranging his face into a fierce scowl. “Now.”

Sobbing, Steve looked down and nodded.

“Yes, master.”

Steve was breathing fast and hard, all but hyperventilating as he gripped his cock to make it stand in the air. Though crying and flinching, he was so hard, an angry purple-red from not having come yet. This time Steve’s hand trembled noticeably as he tilted the candle so it pointed down at his cock and spilled fat drops of the crimson wax over his glans. The shout Steve let out was louder than any before. Steve let go of his cock, just barely managing to keep hold of the candle as he writhed on the floor, tossing his head and crying out long and loud. Through it all, his cock was still unbelievably hard, smearing precome and half-dried wax on his belly, his lungs working harshly as he squirmed.

Bucky watched, enthralled, making sure every second of this was burned into his memory. He was so focused on Steve he wasn’t even aware of his own body any more. Finally, after long seconds Steve opened his eyes, wet and blue, and looked right at Bucky as he took hold of his own cock again.

Bucky nodded at him, letting him know he was done. Bucky wouldn’t make him drip the wax on his cock again. Not today, at least.

Closing his eyes tightly, Steve fell back and just breathed as he stroked. When he slowly opened his eyes again, he looked at the camera and licked his lips.

“Thank you, master. I’m ready... I’m ready for you now.”

Looking at his wristwatch Bucky made sure the time for the recording was up and reached to turn the camera off. The moment the red light on the camera blinked off he was at Steve’s side, catching him as he slumped to the side, and touching Steve’s face, bending down to press their lips together briefly.

“You were so good,” he kissed Steve again, feeling him arch into the kiss and whimper. “Did so good, I’m so proud of you. You followed my instruction so well, are so beautiful.” 

Bucky couldn’t help himself, he kissed Steve again.

“You can have anything you want as reward, just tell me. You want to come?” he asked, running his fingertips very lightly over Steve’s hard, abused cock. “You want to be fucked?” He moved his hand deeper between Steve’s legs, pressing at the still vibrating toy, moving it a bit deeper into him and making him gasp. “I will give it whatever you need, Steve. Tell me what you want for your reward for being such a good, good boy for me today.”

“Please,” Steve said thickly, “I want to feel you.”

“I’m touching you,” Bucky promised. “I won’t leave, will touch you however long you want, will make you come, give you relief, I promise.”

“Skin,” Steve gasped, arching into Bucky. “Please, fuck me. I need… I need to feel you.”

Bucky hesitated, thinking about what Steve had said to him, how he wanted Bucky naked. He wouldn’t strip completely, but that didn't mean he couldn’t give Steve skin.

“I will, Stevie, I will. Make you feel so good, just wait a second.”

Standing quickly, Bucky pulled the condom packet from his pocket and put it between his teeth as he unfastened his jeans and pushed them down. He still had his boots on, so he couldn’t kick them off, but it left his hips and legs bare. There were some scars there too, but they were old and faded and didn’t bother Bucky much. He crawled over Steve, between his lewdly spread legs, making him feel the brush of his naked skin on his legs as he ripped the condom packet apart. It took two tries to roll it onto his cock, his hands were shaking so badly. When he had, he lay over Steve, catching one of the hands Steve was reaching for him with, and pushed it under his shirt on the right side, where the skin was whole and where he could actually feel it when Steve’s wide palm spread out on his skin.

“Can you feel me now? Can you feel my skin?” Bucky asked roughly as he groped for the end of the vibrator still buzzing up a storm inside Steve.

“Yes, yes,” Steve gasped, arching against Bucky and holding hard to his side. “Bucky, oh god, yes.”

Steve flinched and jerked against him as Bucky pulled the vibrator carefully free, moaning loudly as he threw it aside and aimed his cock at that swollen, red hole. He pushed in in one continuous movement until he was balls-deep inside Steve, feeling his soft, slick walls flutter and clench weakly around him. It must have hurt at least a little, but Steve only let out a breathy moan and gripped at Bucky tighter.

This time, Bucky didn’t tease. He started fucking Steve as gently and as carefully as he could, stretching down to kiss him. Steve whimpered, and Bucky wrapped his palm about his abused, red, hot cock, feeling the dried wax against his skin as he stroked him carefully while fucking his used hole. Bucky couldn’t help moaning, realising now how turned on he was, how much he needed this, needed Steve, and needed to come inside him. 

“Beautiful, so beautiful.” Bucky was gasping, making the words nearly incoherent. “Never seen anyone as perfect as you, Steve. So lovely, so perfect and obedient, so prettily mine.” 

Bucky thrust in slowly, easily, but made sure to go deep, to aim for Steve’s prostate to get him off as soon as possible. He pulled at Steve's cock, feeling him tremble and shiver under him, clenching down on Bucky so hard, so wonderfully, it made Bucky lose his mind. Steve’s legs hooked over his thighs and Bucky inhaled, knowing Steve had wanted skin, but not expecting him to work so hard to get it when he was already so overwrought, so exhausted from pushing himself so far.

When Steve came it was almost soundless, letting out small, hurt gasps as his tired body locked down again, cock spurting weakly in Bucky’s hand. The way it felt, Steve panting into his ear, smelling of come and sweat and wax, sent Bucky over the edge too, whitening out his vision, making him hold onto Steve with all his might, probably bruising him as he pulsed and pulsed, his own cock oversensitive after the marathon of a scene they just ended.

Bucky came to, to Steve’s fingers in his hair, tangled while his hand remained under Bucky’s shirt. Still breathing hard, Steve’s eyes were half-closed, legs still wrapped about Bucky’s hips, feeling as much of Bucky as he could. Steve wanted this, Bucky realised, really wanted this. Needed to touch Bucky, touch his skin. It meant so much more to him than Bucky had first thought. It wasn’t just about sex to him. Bucky wondered why, what made physical closeness equal affection for Steve, but he definitely wasn’t going to deny it to Steve completely, not like he had the whole day. He probably wouldn’t agree to join in showers anytime soon, but he could work around it, could meet this need of Steve’s.

As Bucky pulled up to look at him, he saw his eyes half-closed and glazed. Steve was officially out of it. He still turned towards Bucky’s touch, but wasn’t doing it consciously. Regretfully, Bucky had to shift away long enough to actually pull his boots off - noting for the future to always unstrap them before the scenes - and to shake out of his jeans completely, freeing his legs. The second he pulled away he heard Steve whimper, and though he worked quickly, when he turned back towards him again Steve was shaking and holding himself tight. 

Heart clenching, Bucky smoothed his hand along Steve’s side, trying to calm him with touch. It worked better than words and Steve settled, looking up at him with that same half-lidded, dazed expression. Smiling, Bucky looked his lover over. There was wax all over his body and Bucky needed to take it off before it started to itch. Steve was also sweaty, streaked with come and lube. A mess. A beautiful mess, but outside of the scene, Bucky doubted Steve liked to stay that way.

Though Steve didn’t look like he was going to complain about anything at the moment.

Bucky’s gaze fell on the collar. It was so very dark against the pale skin of Steve’s neck, looked so pretty framing it. It wasn’t a collar Bucky had bought him though, and he wasn’t sure what the collar meant to Steve, not completely. Besides if he wanted to wash Steve, and he did - wanted to take care of him, wanted to put him back together after he had done his best to break him - he needed it off. Regretfully, since Steve was too out of it to participate, Bucky unlocked the collar and took it off, rubbing gentle circles over the reddened skin. It had happened when he had pulled at Steve’s collar when giving him his previous reward and would probably bruise by tomorrow.

Sliding his arms under Steve’s back and under his legs, Bucky picked him up and straightened with a grunt. He had worked hard to rebuild the muscles he’d lost after his injury, but Steve was a big man, bigger than it had seemed watching him in the pretty women’s clothes, or kneeling at Bucky’s feet. He started towards the stairs, but didn’t know exactly where Steve’s bedroom was. He did know where the bathroom was, and that Steve had a bathtub in there so he went in that direction

Steve was mostly limp in his arms, face pressed into Bucky’s neck as Bucky carried him up the stairs and then into the bathroom, left conveniently open. He put Steve in the bath, turned on the light and made a pleased noise as the water ran warm right from the start. Hesitating minutely, Bucky rolled his sleeves up to his elbows, exposing the still-pink scars on his left forearm all the way down to his wrist. They went up, too, all the way to his shoulder and spread over his chest from where they’d tortured him, but he wouldn’t let himself think of that now. Anyone who looked at the scars would realise they were man-made, the shapes way too regular for anything else. Too distinctive.

One of Steve’s hands closed about his wrist and Bucky started, but Steve had merely turned to look at him the same way he’d been since he’d come. 

“You okay, Stevie?” Bucky asked as the water began filling the tub.

“Yeah,” Steve breathed, the word slow and languid. “You’re here.”

The words sent a blush climbing up Bucky’s neck and he cleared his throat.

“I promised I wouldn’t leave you,” Bucky reminded gently. Even if Steve tried to kick him out now, seeing the state he was in, Bucky would probably call in somebody to stay with him. No way was he going to leave Steve alone now, not while he was this vulnerable.

“They always say that,” Steve argued, his tone still floaty and even. “They don’t always mean it.”

Bucky gritted his teeth. He’d like to meet the person who would leave Steve in a state like this, vulnerable and defenseless, and fucking break some bones.

The blue eyes sharpened and Steve whined.

“I’m sorry,” he murmured, and Bucky was reminded of the first time, how sensitive he’d been then, and could only imagine it was worse now.

“Don’t apologise, I’m not angry at you,” Bucky hushed. “You did everything right.”

The hand on Bucky’s wrist tightened and Steve took a deep breath before letting it out all at once.

“You sure?”

“Yes.” 

Bucky grabbed the washcloth, soaped it, and turned towards Steve, pressing the warm cloth to his neck and then sliding it down his chest in a slow, smooth stroke. Murmuring incoherently, Steve closed his eyes under the touch. Slowly, Bucky started to wash all the sweat and come off his lover, gently rubbing at the skin to take away the wax. Natural skin oils were already working in his favor, making the wax detach all the more easily. The fact Steve was shaved everywhere helped a lot too. And also, possibly, made Bucky fall head-over-heels for Steve that little bit more. He had never had this, this kind of connection happen so quickly, or so deeply.

It took some time to get all off the wax off, but Bucky didn’t mind the work. He liked it, liked how easily Steve moved under his direction, the small, sleepy sounds he made when Bucky ran the soapy washcloth over his arms, his shoulders, his legs, how trustingly he splayed his thighs for Bucky as he cleaned his soft, fragile cock, and made sure the wax hadn’t left any burns, nothing worse than a bit of reddened skin that would fade in a day or so.

When Steve was clean, Bucky went to pick him up again and Steve squirmed.

“You don’t have to,” he muttered, “I can get up now. I think.”

Lips twitching, Bucky helped Steve stand and was surprised when he leaned heavily against his arm even after he’d stepped from the tub. He’d thought Steve arguing about being carried had been his way of ending the care Bucky was giving, but apparently he had had some other motivation. Pillowing his head on Bucky’s shoulder, he hooked an arm about Bucky’s waist and tugged towards the door. 

Following those tugs, Steve led him to a large master bedroom very different from the simple, sparse set downstairs. The bedspread was purple, the walls royal blue. Paintings and framed photos took up nearly all available wall space and pink pillows were scattered over the bed. It was wild, yet orderly, and Bucky thought he was getting a glimpse at who Steve was outside the sex and business. 

Helping Steve to the bed, he held up the covers and watched his lover crawl in. He rolled over almost immediately, grabbing Bucky’s wrist again and holding on loosely. It had Bucky’s heart skipping a beat as he sat down on the edge of the bed

“You’re not supposed to be in here,” Steve murmured.

Raising an eyebrow, Bucky lifted his free hand to smooth back Steve’s short blond hair.

“Oh? Why’s that?”

“I don’t let people in here,” Steve answered, not explaining anything at all.

“You let me break you, Steve, let me into your body, what is a bedroom compared to that?”

Steve smiled, a small secretive thing and reached up to touch Bucky’s lips.

“How many people you think’ve done that?” he muttered. “They don’t get to have me. Not like you did.”

“Why? Why did you let me have you then?”

The smile turned to a frown and Steve’s hand fell back to the bed.

“Still trying to figure that out, but…you can stay. If you want to.”

Bucky tangled his fingers into Steve’s hair.

“I need to be up at four in the morning, I'll wake you up,” Bucky warned. He really liked the idea of staying, of going to sleep wrapped around Steve, smelling his skin, feeling him in his arms, so close. Their brief nap hadn’t been nearly enough to sate Bucky’s need for more.

“I don’t care,” Steve said quickly. 

Bucky pulled the comforter away again and crawled into the bed. 

“I’m taking you on your word then,” he murmured as he nudged and pushed at Steve until he had him on his side. He squirmed until he was spooning Steve, the length of Steve’s back pressed to his front, their bare legs tangling together. In moments he felt Steve’s breathing even out, his body go limp in Bucky’s arms. Bucky held him tighter, breathing in his scent as he drifted off to sleep. Pressing his face into the soft curve between Steve’s neck and shoulder, Bucky closed his eyes.


	5. Chapter 5

The door to the instructors locker room slammed inwards, and someone hollered, “Jane Wayne on the deck!”

At Stark Industries, that term applied to a lot of very competent women, but they only ever said it aloud when referring to one. Senior employees darted to pull on some pants, or briefs, but Natasha didn’t care who was naked and who wasn’t. She strode through the men’s locker room and stopped before Bucky, who was sitting on the bench before his locker.

“James,” Natasha said sharply, “could we go one week without you making grown men cry?”

Looking up at her, Bucky cracked a smile.

“I have no idea what you are talking about,” he hedged, wondering if she had already been in his favorite training room, or if he’d had time to hide the damning evidence.

She sighed, taking her hands off her hips, crossing her arms over her chest and leaning against the opposite locker.

“I thought you’d be in a good mood after spending some time with Steve.”

That caught Bucky off guard.

“I…” 

What was he supposed to say? That they had spent almost a whole day with Steve experiencing one of the most intense encounters he’d ever had, but failed to talk to the guy enough to even get his goddamned phone number. All he could do was send an email to a goddamned site address and hope Steve responded. He’d said he needed Bucky to finish the scenes, but now that Bucky was out of Steve’s home he wasn’t sure he couldn’t just find someone else. How could _Steve_ not have another dom on hand? Besides, he’d been told he was going to be just a replacement for Steve’s regular partner. The whole 101 series had been supposed to be filmed with somebody different anyway.

Natasha sighed and gave him a soft look.

“That bad, huh?”

Bucky looked at the guys still in the locker room, who were all in various stages of undress.

“I’m looking for a sparring partner, anybody in?” he asked loudly.

Within moments, the room was empty, towels and pieces of clothing abandoned on benches and floor, lockers left open. For some reason people hated sparring with him. He had no idea why.

“Really, James?” Natasha asked, trying to scowl but the corners of her lips were pulling up anyway.

“I wasn’t going to talk about Steve with so many people around!” he protested sharply.

Natasha held up her hands, surrendering unexpectedly.

“Okay, that’s fair. So what happened?”

“We didn’t shoot that 101 thing you and Tony told me about,” Bucky admitted.

“Why not?” Natasha pushed, and Bucky knew she wouldn’t stop until she had all of it out of him, one way or another.

Bucky looked at his hands.

“I did something and he safeworded out,” he said, as vaguely as possible. He wasn’t going to give her any specific details, but there were very few people who had stuck with him through all his surgeries and the painful rehabilitation process.

When she spoke, Natasha’s voice was surprisingly cold.

“Did you hurt him?”

Bucky gave her a hard look, raising his eyebrows. He had never hurt a sub physically, just tended to freak them out. Natasha knew that, or she should. If she judged him the same way everybody else did, maybe he as was mistaken about their friendship as what Steve had wanted at the beginning. Maybe he really was shit at social interaction.

Standing, Bucky faced her on even ground, no longer allowing her the upper hand by remaining seated.

“You have problem with me, Natasha, please spell it out in detail since clearly relying on trust is no longer in the cards.”

“A lot of people have hurt, Steve, James. If he’s hurt again, I need to know.”

“Then call him,” he said shortly, “since you’ve already made your opinion clear here.” 

Bucky made to brush past her, feeling strangely hurt that she’d immediately think he would hurt someone, and then what, leave them alone and in pain maybe? Did she think he beat the guy? Cut him? Fucking raped him maybe? And all this time he thought she knew him, understood him.

“James,” Natasha said sharply, catching Bucky by the shoulder and forcing him to whip around and shrug her hand off.

“What?”

“I,” she took a breath through her nose, let it out, her shoulders lowering fractionally. “I’m sorry.”

“For what? Introducing me to Steve?”

Natasha’s eyes narrowed.

“Don’t be an ass,” she growled.

“Why not? I thought you…” Bucky swallowed the angry words. “Never mind,” he gave up on the fight. He couldn’t change how people perceived him, and on days like today, he wondered if it was even worth the effort to try. “Steve panicked at a change in scenario. If you’re worried about him, call him.” He turned to his bag and pulled out his phone, thrusting it at her. “Here, you can do it right now.”

Natasha didn’t even look at the phone.

“If I thought you’d lie to me, I never would have asked, and you know that. I don’t waste my time. You, however, are trying to waste it by throwing a pity party for yourself. I’m sorry, James. You had me worried about Steve and I…may…have overreacted.”

Bucky exhaled loudly.

“You are one of very few people who know what I did in the past, one of two that I could be sure would never judge me on sight. It hurt when you looked at me like a stranger would. I trust you, okay? I really do.” Bucky exhaled loudly. “And if you had tried to call him, I would have his number in my phone afterwards,” he admitted.

“You shit, you tried to manipulate me,” Natasha said, torn between anger and appreciation at his gall.

Bucky shrugged a little sheepishly. 

“I got angry.”

“Is that the problem? You don’t have Steve’s number?”

“Yeah,” Bucky admitted. “After the epic fail of the 101 scene, we started playing…and actually played almost until I had to leave so… I don’t even know his last name or have his number,” Bucky admitted, angry all over again, this time at himself.

Natasha frowned. “Didn’t I drop you off at his house a little after four, and you logged into our net today at four, two hours later than usual. How could you not have had time to talk to him?”

Bucky looked at the lockers, then at the floor, then over her shoulder at the window.

“We finished playing around midnight and dropped off,” he admitted. “That’s why I overslept.”

Natasha exhaled.

“That’s almost eight hours. Jesus, James.” She ran a hand over her neatly pulled back hair and then blew out a breath. “All right, gimme your phone.”

Warily Bucky extended the phone, not completely believing she wouldn’t stomp it. She had a temper and hated being manipulated. She considered that _her_ job. After taking it, though, she just typed away, then handed it back.

“There. Call him.”

Bucky looked the the new contact displaying a name: Steve Rogers and a phone number underneath. Looking up, he smiled at Natasha.

“Thank you.”

“Before you go and try to sweet talk him, promise me you’ll stop breaking into your students’ apartments to steal shit from them to display on the achievements board in the training rooms? You legitimately made Fisk cry today, and that man is an ex-marine for god's sake. I heard some of your students discussing going back to the Army since boot camp, compared to _you_ , is nothing. You’re supposed to train them, not torture them!”

Bucky lowered his shoulders, trying to look apologetic.

“I just took their wallets. And cell phones.” He murmured before perking up, remembering the appalling lack of security at the men’s homes. “Nat, they have no security in their places, hell they didn't even wake up while I was stealing shit from their bedside tables!”

“That’s not your job, James. They’re awake when on duty, not asleep.” Turning, she headed for the locker door. “Steal from them while they’re awake. That might even challenge you.”

“But the targets they protect, if I was a bad guy I could clone their security passes!” he defended a little desperately.

“No, James,” she called, “and I’ll take that phone number back!”

“Too late!” he yelled at the closed door. It didn’t matter, she would know he had anyway. If she’d walked away, she’d found another way to get what she wanted.

\---

Steve poured another glass of the red Natasha had brought over and returned to the couch. Leaning over the back of the leather furniture, he ruffled Clint’s blond hair and looked over at Natasha. He had gone to the kitchen to avoid her question, but he wouldn’t be able to do that any more.

“Yes, I let him help with my work.”

“No,” Clint spinning around and looking up at Steve. “You only ever let Sam help!”

Swirling his wine, Steve nodded slowly. 

“Yeah, well, he gave me puppy eyes.”

“James doesn’t have puppy eyes,” Natasha argued. “His standard settings are doom, gloom ,and despair.”

“He does,” Steve insisted, “and, anyways, the performance last night was great. I got six new VIP clients and twenty new standard subscriptions and that was just last night.”

Natasha stared at Steve, her mouth slightly open.

“And you think it’s James’ doing?”

“Yep,” Steve said, popping the ‘p’. “My VIP client was gushing over how open I was, how eager and vulnerable. That’s not even starting on the reviews.” 

Steve shook his head a little, still disbelieving at the way his inbox was barely holding up under the strain.

“Jeez,” Clint muttered. “Think you should keep this guy around. It’s like, what? $750 for a VIP pass?”

“Monthly,” Steve said, downing half his wine in one go.

“And you are sure it’s James influence?” Natasha repeated. “You might have just lucked out with the setup. Fetish always brings in viewers.”

“ _Seven_ VIP clients, Nat,” Steve stressed. “That just… That doesn’t happen simply because they liked the shade of wax I picked!”

“Okay,” Clint said, standing up, “he’s freaking out.”

“I am not freaking out!” Steve protested shrilly, very clearly freaking out.

“Steve,” Natasha started, leaning forward as Clint moved behind him and began massaging at his shoulders, “it’s fine. You’re going to schedule this out, keep on task, and make a ton of money. You have a cap on the number of VIPs you’ll take, remember?”

“Right,” Steve said, leaning back into Clint’s hands and trying to let his childhood friend calm him. “Twenty.”

“Right,” Natasha said. “So there’s nothing to worry about.” Steve pressed his lips together and she narrowed her eyes. “Right?”

“I kissed him,” Steve admitted in a rush and Clint froze behind him. “I know!” he shouted, moving around the couch and dropping onto it. “I don’t know what I was thinking, but good god, that man can kiss.” He snapped up again, looking at Natasha earnestly. “His lips should be illegal.”

Clint snorted. He was the only one in their little group with no interest in the male body.

“I think we are missing something here,“ Natasha said slowly. “I tried talking to James this morning but he was prickly, like a porcupine, and I didn’t get anything more from him other than you ‘played’ a long time then went to sleep.”

“He hasn’t called,” Steve said, slashing his hand through the air, “he hasn’t emailed. He was gone when I woke up this morning!”

“Nat,” Clint said, leaning over to work on steve’s shoulders again, “Steve hasn’t kissed anyone in at least five years.”

“Six,” Steve corrected miserably. “I don’t kiss, and I sure as hell don’t let them interfere with business, and I _definitely_ don’t let them in my bedroom! That’s _my_ space!”

Natasha blinked. 

“When he said you dropped off, he meant you slept together, in your _bedroom_? On the same bed?”

“Not the one in the basement, either,” Steve admitted, dropping his head into his hand. “I’m so fucked, guys. It’s like a goddamn relationship.”

“Perish the thought,” Clint teased.

“Well,” Natasha said worriedly, “he might end up in jail again.”

“Not helping!” Steve shouted.

“What made you let him get this close, Steve? Most people don’t much like James these days. He comes off as too intense to most. I honestly didn’t expect you to take such a shine to him on the first meeting.”

“Oh no you don’t, Miss ‘I-have-the-perfect-guy-for-you’,” Steve snapped, pointing a finger at Natasha. “If he’s such a bad guy, why’d both you _and_ Tony send him to me, huh? You know _exactly_ what I see.”

“He’s not a bad guy!” Natasha cut in, “just misunderstood. Needs to be shown how to act properly in company by somebody he doesn't immediately see as a threat. Since I’ve kept harping on him for the last few years to start living again, I am clearly in the ‘do not believe a word she says’ category by now.”

“Yeah, well,” Steve drank deeply from his glass, “I don’t know, okay? He freaked me out within minutes, then was so… so… _unf_ , you know? And I had to have more, and I _got_ more and then I just… I needed to kiss him, so I did.”

“Unf,” Natasha repeated sourly.

“Unf,” Steve said stubbornly, “and clearly there was _something_ different because the subscribers are eating it up.”

“What did he do to freak you out at the beginning? He mentioned something about you safewording out, and I know he is a stickler for heeding the safewords. Should have seen him with a guy who kept pushing at his sub when the girl safe worded at a club. Thought James was going to seriously hurt him.”

“He went off script,” Steve growled. “I tore Tony a new one for that earlier. The hell were you two doing, sending him to me without so much as a warning? I thought he knew what he was doing! He hadn’t a clue, I had to explain everything, and that was _after_ I had freaked out.”

“You stuck with him?” Clint said, surprised.

Steve nodded.

“I could tell he hadn’t meant it maliciously, and he stopped immediately at the safeword, took care of me.”

“That’s one of the reasons I felt it safe to set you up with him,” Natasha pressed. “James is a stickler for consent. Always has been.”

Steve let out a breath, slumping into the couch and pulling Clint’s arms over his shoulders, leaving his hand on his friend’s elbow.

“After I explained that I had to know before I’d agree to let him do anything, he was… He was perfect, Nat. I’ve never been that…that turned on. When it was over? When I was dropping? I would have let him do _anything_. I’ve never lost that much control before. Been doing this for ten years, and that man took me places no one else ever has, and I want him to do it _again_.”

“Is that what’s got you so wound up?” Natasha asked, getting up and sitting on Steve’s other side. Eternally grateful for his friends, Steve slid closer to be cuddled by both. “That he would push you for what he wants because you drop your guard with him?”

“No,” Steve whispered, “not really.”

“So?” Clint asked, perching his head on Steve’s shoulder.

“I…just… He saw me, you know?” Steve looked at Clint, then Natasha. “This stranger, who’d literally just come into the room with me minutes ago, took a single look at me and…did what I secretly wanted. The things I didn’t even let _myself_ know I wanted. Not then and there, but… But he saw through me like I was some kind of open book. It’s terrifying.” Steve swallowed. “I don’t think I could ever get enough.” Desperately, Steve looked up at his friends. “I’m not this guy! You _know_ I’m not this guy. I don’t just…just fall for people! I don’t fall for _anyone_.”

“Anymore,” Clint teased.

“Ha ha,” Steve huffed.

“Maybe you should be chaperoned,” Natasha suggested, “until you trust yourself.”

“No,” Steve said instantly, “if I see him again, I don’t want anyone else around.”

“If?” Clint asked.

Steve whined.

“I want him so damn bad, Clint.”

Natasha squeezed his knee.

“It’s gonna be okay, honey.”


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mentions of past domestic abuse, blow jobs, frotting, negotiation, dirty talk, naked cooking, Bucky becomes obsessed with Steve’s balls

Bucky stopped across the street from Steve’s home and paused, realising that the woman he could see in Steve’s open doorway was Natasha. So she did come to see if her friend was all right. The distrust made his skin itch, and he knew he wasn’t going to walk up there until she was gone. 

Another man appeared with Steve, apparently who Natasha was waiting for. He was taller than Steve by a few inches, curly blond hair, and a trim build. Bucky wondered who the guy was. Was he Steve’s regular dom? Was this the man Bucky was supposed to replace for the videos? He wondered why Steve chose Bucky then, since they looked so different, and clearly the guy wasn’t completely out of the question if he was here now.

Taking a step back into the shadows, because if he wasn’t careful Natasha would spot him, Bucky questioned if he should even still be here. Steve hadn’t taken his call earlier, hadn’t replied to the message he’d left. He was only here now because he couldn’t just let it go. He needed to see Steve personally and know if the silence was deliberate on Steve’s part. Was Bucky about to be rejected again? Or was there a chance to salvage this wonderful thing they had started just the day before?

Finally, after he was sure Natasha and the guy were long gone, Bucky went to the door and rang the bell. He was peripherally aware he had adopted parade rest as he waited for the door to open, something he only did when nervous, locking his body into that familiar position to control his body language. The wait for the door to open was excruciating. Finally, it was yanked open violently.

“Sorry, was washing dishes, did you forget…” Steve was standing there in a thin grey t-shirt, blue-jean shorts, and soapy hands. “Bucky” he whispered, eyes wide, looking absolutely startled that Bucky was here at all. Did he really expect Bucky to be gone, out of sight out of mind? “Jesus, you’re…”

Whatever Bucky was, Steve didn’t finish. He practically leapt forward, grabbing Bucky’s elbow and tugging him inside.

“You didn’t take my call,” Bucky said as he was dragged towards the living room and almost forcefully pushed onto the couch. He shifted, thinking he should have at least taken his boots off at the door.

“Just… Just lemme wash my hands,” Steve said quickly, disappearing behind the half-wall that separated the kitchen and the living room. A moment later, Bucky could hear water running, and Steve’s voice raised over the sound. “I didn’t know you called, and I check my messages on a really tight schedule. Probably just hasn’t happened yet.”

Bucky looked at the open wine on the small coffee table in front of him. It was half empty.

“You dropped my call after the first two rings,” Bucky said, trying to make heads or tails of what was happening. 

Wiping his hands on a towel, Steve appeared back in the doorway, his eyes still wide. His body was radiating nervousness, almost manic energy obscuring anything else he felt.

“Maybe I was on a call? Does it matter? You’re here.”

“I wanted to see you again,” Bucky said quickly, before anything else happened to get the off track again. 

“You did?” Steve blurted, tossing aside the tower and coming closer.

Bucky looked closer at him, at the way he tilted his shoulders, how he held his palms slightly open. Steve was excited to see him, reacted positively. Wanted him here even if there was a kind of anxious energy to him.

“Yes.” Bucky said firmly. “I wasn’t sure if it wouldn’t be too pushy to just show up on your doorstep like this.”

“No, I mean,” Steve paused thoughtfully, then shook his head and said, “No,” again. “I’m glad you came. You left without saying goodbye.”

“I tried waking you. I said bye and you mumbled ‘bye’ at me too.”

“Oh,” Steve waved a hand and climbing over the arm of the couch to sit with one leg tucked beneath him, his entire body facing Bucky. “You can’t trust anything I say if my eyes are closed. I talk in my sleep.”

Bucky smiled, remembering how Steve looked, warm and relaxed in his sleep.

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Bucky said slowly, testing the waters, “for the other nights I stay over.”

“You should,” Steve said with a bright smile. “Oh, fuck, look at me being a terrible host. You want something to drink? I think there’s more of the wine Nat brought over if you’d like some. Whiskey? Water and soda if you don’t drink? I’m kind of a vodka guy myself. Mixed drinks,” Steve flushed and looked away, “and I’m babbling.”

Bucky smiled, patting the couch beside him.

“You’re doing okay,” he reassured as Steve slid across the couch. “All day today I was thinking about the fact we never talked about details. About the 101 videos. Do you still want me to help film them?”

Hand sliding over Bucky’s thigh, his knee pressed to Bucky’s, Steve asked, “That’s all you were thinking about?”

Bucky huffed out a laugh.

“I thought about a lot of things, not all of them appropriate for public consumption.”

“We’re not in public,” Steve said, squeezing Bucky’s thigh, “but I do want your help. I’m saying want because I _need_ it; I’m fucked without you, but I want it to be you.”

“Are you sure? You were scared yesterday.”

“I was,” Steve said, still being blunt and forthright as he’d been the day before. “That happens sometimes. Afterward, that’s what matters to me, and you were perfect, Bucky.”

Bucky lowered his eyes.

“I don’t want you to change your mind later on. I’ve been in a situation where after a few scenes I was summarily dumped, and it hurt. If you are hesitant about anything, we can wait. Or talk about it now.”

“Bucky,” Steve said gently as he took his hand and squeezed. Bucky was reminded of the moment Steve hadn’t let him leave. “I can’t promise you that. Hang on, let me explain,” he said as Bucky went to pull away. “Right now, you’re perfect, but maybe we won’t be as…as incredible together in a month, or five. Maybe I’ll panic, or you’ll move, or…something, but right now I want this, I want you. Give _me_ a chance.”

“I just don’t want to hurt you,” Bucky admitted. “I want to get to know you, want to believe that if something goes wrong, you’ll at least tell me what it was, not just kick me out on my ass and be done. Can you promise me that?”

“I can promise you that,” Steve said easily. “We’ll talk if something isn’t working, we’ll try to work it out. That’s how it’s supposed to be, and you... Bucky, you already listened to me. A lot of doms new to the scene think they get to do whatever they want regardless of what their subs want. You don’t, and that’s going to take us really far, okay?”

Bucky smiled, laying his own hand on Steve’s thigh. 

“There are so many things I want to do with you, Steve, you have no idea.” Bucky murmured.

Steve laughed.

“I can guess. We’re gonna have to figure out a schedule, find out when we’re both free. My deadline’s in a couple months, so we honestly don’t have that much time. Then, well, if you’d like to help out with the other videos, you were kind of a smash hit and, um,” Steve looked down again, color rising high on his cheeks, “if you’re interested in anything else.”

“I want everything, Steve,” Bucky reassured. “Being with you… It felt freeing, made me feel alive for the first time in a while. Made me happy and made me think about the future. I’m not here just for sex. Sex was always easy for me to get, but it never felt…right, never was something all that important to me. You?” Steve looked up at him hopefully. “You make me want things, Steve.”

“Like?” Steve asked quietly. “‘Cause usually all anyone wants from me is what we did yesterday. Marathon sex.”

“Marathon sex seems attractive enough,” Bucky agreed with a nod, “but I would also like to watch a movie or take you for a walk, show you what I do for work.”

“I would like that,” Steve said, his hand tightening on Bucky’s once more. “I’d like to make you dinner, too, introduce you to my friends, but, um, right now? I’d really like to suck your dick. Is that too forward?”

Bucky swallowed, his throat suddenly very tight and very dry.

“You have had me fantasizing all day long and you think I’d refuse an offer like that? Steve, you might just break my brain.”

Steve’s smile went from sweet and pleased to wicked before Bucky had even finished speaking. Sliding off the couch, he placed his hands on Bucky’s knees and pushed them wide. Leaning forward, his talented mouth soon had the button open without his hands, just like Bucky had asked before. 

“Why don’t,” Steve murmured, taking the zipper in his teeth and pulling it down, “you tell me all about those,” his breath teased Bucky’s skin as he pushed open Bucky’s pants, the now open v exposing his thickening cock, “while I enjoy this?”

Bucky put his hands on Steve’s head, smoothing down the blond strands and rubbing his fingertips over the warm skin.

“I don’t want to scare you,” Bucky murmured as Steve nuzzled against the base of his cock, breathing in his scent. “They’re just fantasies, you don’t have to like them or do anything more than just let me talk about them.”

“I know,” Steve said gently, sitting up enough to run his tongue teasingly over Bucky’s half-hard tip, “Talk. If I like it, I’ll squeeze your thigh twice.”

Bucky licked his lips, fiercely grateful that Steve wanted to just listen to him. His previous attempt at building a submissive relationship fell apart because of his fantasies, even though they never did anything more kinky than the collar and very light spanking.

“I noticed you get stressed when there’s little time or a lot to do.” Steve looked up at him, still just lapping at Bucky’s cock, making him fill out all the faster. “There’s a kind of stressful, manic energy that makes you twitch all over the place. I couldn’t stop thinking what if, when you got like that, I just put the collar on you, put a spider gag in your mouth and made you lie down between my legs.”

Steve took his tip in his mouth, suckling gently and Bucky tightened his fingers in the soft blond hair. “I would put my cock in your mouth, still soft, and just have you lie there, quiet, as I stroked your head and maybe talked to you about my day, or the latest dumb shit that my students did.”

As Bucky’s cock fully lengthened, Steve pulled off the tip and licked from base to slit, laving the head, and then licking back down. “If I got hard, I would just fuck your mouth until I came, just using your throat. It wouldn’t be your responsibility to take care of me. Your only purpose would be to just lie there,” Steve hummed and took him into his mouth, just a few inches, to lick and suck, “with my cock inside your mouth. If you got hard, I would finger you until you came, or give you a nice, long handjob.” Bucky swallowed, his breath hitching at the heat of Steve’s mouth. “God you are good at this.”

Smiling around his cock, Steve squeezed his thigh twice. Bucky smiled down at Steve and slid his palms to the man’s wide shoulders, giving him a squeeze.

“You would like that? Just spending time with me like a sweet, beautiful toy? Your only concern my cock in your mouth?” Bucky was still smiling as Steve sucked and bobbed on the last few inches of his cock. “I would love that, would take real good care of you afterwards. Maybe have you stretch me out on my stomach and fuck me nice and long, making me yours in turn.”

Steve choked, pulling off abruptly and coughing as tears ran down his cheeks.

“What?” Steve managed between heavy, choking breaths in between the chest racking coughing.

Bucky did his best to steady Steve.

“You don’t switch?” Bucky asked, watching how wet Steve’s lips were.

“No, I just.. _You_ switch?” Steve wiped at his tears with the back of his hand. “I mean, I wasn’t going to complain, I just thought… I kind of thought I wouldn’t end up topping again as long as we were…together.”

Bucky blinked down at Steve, frowning.

“Why?”

“Why?” Steve repeated. “Because… Because you didn’t… I mean, clearly I was wrong, but I thought you wouldn’t want that, and it’s not like I was going to make you.”

“In the context of some scenes yeah, I like you straining to obey, and fucking you is mind-blowing, but even then there are things I would like. Like using that flogger you mentioned on your ass until it was cherry red, your thighs, maybe even your balls. Putting a vibrating plug in you and then having you fuck me just the way I like.”

Flushing, Steve leaned down and gave Bucky an appreciative lick. 

“Yeah, um, yes,” Steve murmured, squeezing Bucky’s thigh twice before taking him into his mouth again.

“Just because you let me tell you what to do, I never thought it meant I get to take things away from you. If you like to top too, then great, we can do that. If you don’t, that’s also great.”

Steve pulled off again, but thankfully not because he was choking this time.

“I like both,” he admitted and then immediately wrapped his lips about Bucky’s cock again. This time he swallowed, all the way to the root, sucking and swallowing before pulling back to tend to just the bit that fit in his mouth again.

Bucky grinned down at Steve, feeling warm and happy…and very, very hard. Steve’s mouth was so tight, so wet, so good on him.

“You ever used sounds?” he asked, pushing a little at Steve to make him take more of his cock at once. Without resisting, Steve swallowed, his nose soon buried in Bucky’s curls as his throat massaged his cock. He held himself there before pulling off, but this time swallowed again on the way down. “Humm for yes.”

Steve hummed, the vibration going all the way through Buck’s cock.

“Oh,” Bucky swallowed a moan. “That’s good. That’s very good. I love watching them sink in. I would adore putting them in you. The smooth ones, with the metal ring that fits under the head of your cock to keep it in place. Maybe put one inside you and then slowly stroke you, stimulating your cock from the inside and the outside?” Steve shuddered, sucking harder at Bucky’s cock. “Or take such a stuffed full cock into my mouth and suck you for half an hour, making you come over and over again, make you cry from how good it feels. Would you like that?”

This time the answer wasn’t immediate. Steve’s hand traveled up and down Bucky’s thigh as he worked his cock, glancing at Bucky almost nervously. Just when Bucky was thinking he wasn’t going to respond, indicating no, his hand squeezed Bucky’s thigh twice. Bucky exhaled, making note of that small hesitance. The sounding was a go, but Steve probably had stipulations.

“You know what I would love, too?” Bucky moaned again. “Don’t make me come too fast, Steve,” he said before clearing his throat and continuing. “You, coming to me with a list of things you enjoy, things you always wanted to try, but never did.” Steve pulled off, licking all around Bucky’s head, sliding his tongue into the slit, then sucking on the head. “ You showing me pictures, maybe the toys themselves, a little embarrassed, a lot aroused, and explaining what you would like me to do to you. That’s a fantasy too. I jerked off today to it, of the image of you like that.” 

Steve moaned, his eyes falling closed and he squeezed Bucky’s thigh hard twice.

“Talk to me if you want.” Bucky was petting the bent over head in his lap. “I don’t mind waiting. I would love to hear you.” 

And he would. His cock was achingly hard and his balls were pulling up with how good it felt, the pleasure all but swamping him, but he loved this. Loved having Steve so close and being so good to him, loved just talking to him. He thought he would love it even more if Steve told him his own fantasies, too. 

“You just want me to tell you all the things I want you to do to me,” Steve teased, breath heating and then chilling his cock. “You should know, there’s not much I haven’t done.”

Bucky rubbed Steve’s bottom lip with his thumb, enjoying how wet it was, how Steve opened his mouth for him and his tongue snaked out to lap at the pad.

“I don’t think that’s true. You don’t trust easily, are more wary than many a soldier that’s seen combat, and I think you keep so much of yourself apart from this, that there are plenty of things you’ve never tried.” 

Bucky took his cock in his hand and rubbed the head over Steve’s cheek, watching as his lids lowered, hiding his expression from Bucky for a moment. Then he turned his head, brushing a kiss against Bucky’s shaft before looking up at him again. The nervousness was back, along with some uncertainty.

“You’re not wrong,” Steve said slowly, “I keep myself…to myself, or I try to.” His hands ran up Bucky’s thighs. “But sex? That’s work. There’s not a lot I haven’t done, and that’s mostly stuff I have no interest in. The things… The things I haven’t done?” Steve swallowed, turning and licking at Bucky’s cock, giving himself time, Bucky realized, but he liked that too, liked that the pleasure blunted his edges, gave him more patience than usual, made him clearly, more approachable than when he was in his mission oriented state of mind. “It was all very controlled, though. I either knew exactly what would happen, or had someone there who would ensure nothing did that I didn’t want.”

“Do you know,” Bucky murmured, wishing he had Steve out of his shirt now, “that I don’t much enjoy masturbation? I mean, I do it, mostly because my body demands it every now and then, but I can as well go without. I find nothing exciting in my own touch, because it’s predictable. I know where the touch will come from, how it will feel, how long it will last. That’s why I wanted a sub, a partner, so badly. It’s so much better when I don’t know all those things. I love the way you touch me, like I’m worthy of worship, like you need to please me so badly it hurts you. It makes me feel very protective of you.”

“I do,” Steve said quietly, “it makes me feel…anxious when I do something wrong.” Turning towards Bucky’s cock, he nuzzled it and then licked him again. “It’s part of the reason I’m so careful with my scenes and my partners.”

“I think I enjoy punishing you a little too much,” Bucky admitted, carding his fingers through Steve’s hair. “Yesterday, with the wax… I knew you were going to drip on your shaft because it’s less sensitive, hurts less. What did you feel when I told you to drip the wax on the most sensitive part? You knew it would hurt a lot more.”

“I did,” Steve swallowed, looking up at Bucky, “I just… I knew you wanted it. Wanted to do it yourself, but you couldn’t and I wanted to make you happy, so I did what you couldn’t.”

“If I had been there with you, I would have made it hurt more. I would have tied you down, put my cock inside you instead of that vibe, and then I would have dripped the wax over your glans until your cock was all but dripping with it. Because that last moment? You were incandescent, Steve. The most beautiful man I’d ever seen, writhing, squirming, moaning, expression torn between pain and pleasure. I wanted to feel you then, feel you from the inside.”

Shuddering again, Steve ducked his head and Bucky quickly reached out, taking his chin and forcing his face up again. Steve met his gaze hesitantly, but openly, his eyes dark with desire, but still very nervous.

“You want it, too,” Bucky said, “but it scares you.”

Steve let out a shaky breath.

“You’re the kind of man I could give myself to and not realize how in over my head I was until it was too late.”

Bucky made sure to keep Steve’s face tilted up before he leaned down and kissed him, short and sweet, tasting himself on Steve’s lips.

“I would never hurt you, not for real,” Bucky promised after the kiss.

“That’s what they all say,” Steve said wryly. 

“You’ll see,” Bucky promised. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“In time,” Steve said, “maybe we can work up to that, then.”

Bucky smiled a filthy grin.

“Do you know I’m an expert at bondage? I know ropes, I know hundreds of different kinds of knots. I thought about my favorite ropes, but decided to throw them away. I want to buy new ones, ones especially for you. Something that nobody else has ever touched. I don’t really have many toys, not as many as you, but I want to buy all new ones, because I think you deserve new things, toys you can approve or reject yourself.” Bucky licked his lips and made sure to stare Steve in the eye. “I want to go out with you to buy a new collar, one I will give to you, one I will put on you when we play. I don’t mind other ones for the videos you make, it’s a thrill in itself just watching you perform for them with such dedication, but I want you to be mine Steve.”

“Bucky..”

He tugged at Steve then, interrupting him and making him get up from the floor to straddle him, urging him to sit on Bucky’s knees. 

“What?” Steve asked, arms reaching for Bucky’s shoulders to steady himself.

“I want to watch you come,” Bucky said roughly, already working at Steve’s pants. When he had them open he found Steve gratifyingly hard, cock flushed pink, and head a little swollen. Just from listening to Bucky talk, from sucking him so well. “God you are perfect Steve, perfect for me.”

“B-because I’m not wearing underwear?” Steve asked, stuttering as Bucky wrapped his hand around both their cocks, squeezing them tightly together. They both moaned, Steve slumping a little over him, tucking his face into Bucky’s neck.

Bucky huffed out a shaky laugh. 

“No, because you’re yourself.”

Steve gasped into Bucky’s neck as Bucky started jerking them both off.

“But,” he panted, “you hardly know me.”

“Doesn’t change the fact I like what I see,” he dragged his fist over their cocks, pleasure licking down his back. Steve whined, his lips brushing his neck only making it better.

“I want to try everything, all over again,” Steve said, his sentences short and broken as Bucky pumped them toward orgasm. “I want to see how it feels with you. Sounds, plugs, bondage, clamps; all of it. I want to give it all to you, to explore,” Steve shuddered, moaning, “with you.”

Turning his head, Steve kissed along Bucky’s throat, sucking at the skin and leaving hickeys behind. Bucky dragged up his tightly closed fist over them both, feeling the pressure on his own skin and the silkiness of Steve’s cock under his palm. He jerked them both slowly, surely. He was already almost at the point of no return, but he needed Steve to reach it with him.

“We can do that,” Bucky assured. “We can have all of that. I will explore every inch of you body, Steve; make you reach heights you’ve never even dreamed of, make you shatter so beautifully and then put you back together. I just need you to be a good boy for me now, Steve, and come for me like this, so pretty with your wet mouth, and your hard dick in my fist. So hot.” Steve shuddered against him, hands closing hard on Bucky’s shoulders. He moaned, louder, and Bucky didn’t think he’d ever get enough of how his words could make Steve come undone by themselves. “Come on, give it up for me. Then we’ll get to eat that dinner you mentioned, and _then_ you can take me up to your bedroom where you can fuck me as slow and as long you want.“ 

“Bucky,” Steve gasped and he stuffed his other hand into the back of Steve’s pants. Without anything to keep him from Steve’s skin, he easily found his still-sensitive hole. Biting his lip, he imagined it was still a little sore, maybe aching. He rubbed soft circles there, making Steve gasp and hold on to him tighter. 

“We’ll give that pretty little hole of yours a rest today, even though I would love to abuse it even more than yesterday.” Talking was getting hard. Bucky was so close, almost dizzy with pleasure, and the weight and warmth of Steve on his lap. “I love watching you come, love the faces you make. Maybe you’ll rub yourself all over my body, against my belly, so that I can watch you come apart as you do it.” 

Twisting his fist around their cocks on every upstroke, Bucky squeezed their cocks together, pressing at Steve’s hole, but not past, just making Steve feel it. The edge was still a little puffy, sensitive enough that Steve shuddered rhythmically, gasping, his hips twitching into Bucky’s hand. His breath warmed Bucky’s throat, making him shiver each time he moaned, or let out a ragged breath of air.

“Come for me, baby,” Bucky urged, feeling himself at the edge.

Bucky hadn’t expected Steve to come right then, but he did, biting down on Bucky’s shoulder through his shirt. Bucky followed him immediately, their cocks spilling over his fist, making a mess of both his and Steve’s clothes in the process. Shuddering, Steve clung harder to him, whimpering against his throat.

“Think,” Steve said breathlessly, “we’ll need to clean up,” he nuzzled Bucky’s jaw and carefully sat back, “before dinner.”

Bucky looked down at his shirt. 

“I’ll need to borrow a shirt,” he admitted, letting go of their cocks and running his fingers over Steve’s softening one. He liked watching it lose that hardness and become soft under his hands.

“You’ll have to bring clothes to leave over,” Steve said, twitching under Bucky’s touch, but not pulling away from it. 

“I can leave some clothes over?” Bucky asked, surprised again how deep Steve was letting him in.

“With that no ‘naked policy’, I imagine you’ll go through a lot.”

“Yeah,” Bucky shifted uncomfortably. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay.” Steve said gently, stroking Bucky’s shoulders. “I understand. Don’t like it, but I understand, and you know, I’ll listen if you ever wanna tell me what happened.”

“I’m slowly getting that, yeah,” Bucky admitted, looking back to Steve’s softening cock and stroking it with his fingers, enjoying the way Steve twitched for him. “I can’t stop touching you,” he confessed, still trailing his fingers over Steve’s cock, up to his hard belly and down again.

“I noticed,” Steve murmured, eyes half closed. “I don’t mind. You want me naked, Buck? Cooking for you without a stitch on?”

Bucky shivered. Yes, he wanted that. He closed his eyes to gather himself as he felt his completely spent cock give an interested twitch of its own.

“Apron,” he gasped. “Safer if you put on an apron.”

Chuckling darkly, Steve nodded.

“I happen to have one. White, frilly; gift from a client.”

Bucky growled, trying to express how fucking much he liked what Steve was offering to do for him. He clenched his hands over Steve’s hips and twisted them, landing Steve mostly on his back on the couch and hovering over him. Though he gasped in surprise, Steve went without protest, staring up at Bucky with his big blue eyes.

“Let’s help you clean up first,” he said through a throat tight with something he didn’t even know how to name, and then lowered his head to lick at Steve’s spent cock. It felt vulnerable and fragile under his tongue. Clenching his hands tight over Bucky’s shoulders, Steve shuddered and gasped as Bucky sucked him into his mouth, cleaning Steve of both their come and enjoying the sounds he made, the way he squirmed so sweetly. He regretted he couldn’t just make him come again right away, but the thought of having Steve cooking for him naked was such a goddamn turn on, he needed to do _something_.

And best of all, Steve was letting him. He was writhing on the leather couch, breath rasping in his throat as he wriggled so much Bucky had to pin his hips down.

“Enough,” Steve pleaded, hands pushing Bucky away. “Stop. Too much,”

Regretfully, Bucky pulled away, letting the shiny wet cock free of his mouth. Looking down at him with dark eyes, Steve slid his hand over his cheek, then up to ruffle his hair.

“Food, yeah?” Steve reminded him. “Take my clothes off?”

“You don’t have to ask me twice,” Bucky agreed and ran his hands up Steve’s hips to the waistband of the already-opened shorts and pulled them down. Steve lifted himself from the couch, making disrobing easier, and Bucky licked his lips again as he revealed the long legs, so bare and so smooth. Really, there were miles and miles of them, and once again he couldn't help himself. Bending down, and gave Steve two quick bites: one on his thigh, and the second on his hip.

“One day,” Bucky murmured reaching back and pushing Steve’s shirt up his chest, “I’m going to just rip the clothes right off of you. Just shred the cotton to pieces.”

“Yeah?” Steve asked, licking his lips. “Then what? Throw me over the furniture, fuck me? Force me against a wall and take me there? Or pin me to the floor, make me take your cock, fuck both my face and my ass before you let me come?”

Bucky growled out, “You tempt me. What makes you feel I would let you come that fast? I would pin you to the wall, arms locked behind your back, fuck you hard and deep, making you gasp and writhe, push you up on your toes as I fill your ass with my come.” Pressing a kiss to Steve’s thigh, he bit him again and shivered as he cried out. “Then I would put a hook inside you to keep you on your toes and every time you lowered yourself I would spank you in punishment. I would keep you like that, straining on your toes until I got hard again and got to fuck you all over again. After that I would let you come, make you all but pass out at how hard I would make you come.” Bucky promised roughly, already seeing it in his mind's eye. The unyielding metal of the hook, the way it would stretch Steve’s hole when inevitably his calves gave up and he sank down on in. The sounds Steve would make as Bucky painted his ass red, maybe have him count out the strikes, and if he lost count Bucky would have to start all over again. He wondered how long would it take before Steve would start to cry and if would he stay hard throughout it all.

“Jesus Christ, Bucky,” Steve said, eyes having gone wide in the middle of Bucky’s promise. “Nothin’ halfway with you, is there?”

Bucky tugged at Steve until he rose up enough to to let Bucky free him from his shirt, his eyes still dark and vulnerable.

“I really like you, Steve. I think you’re perfect, and the fact you like me sharing my fantasies with you like that? Makes me happy,” Bucky admitted, tossing the shirt away and putting the palms of his hands on Steve’s incredible pecs. Tits, really. So hard, so nice, so perky. “I might be getting a little overenthusiastic.”

“A little,” Steve agreed, but his lips tugged up in a teasing smile. “I’d really like you to pin me down, you know. Not a lot of men can do that so I can’t actually get away.”

“I can guarantee I could pin you down,” Bucky murmured, tracing his hands to Steve’s shoulders, then down his arms. “I was, you could say a specialist, while I was still in the military. That meant I worked mostly without backup. I had to get really good at hand-to-hand. I have a particular fondness for submission holds.” 

He closed his hands over Steve’s wrists briefly before letting go and trailing his hands back up Steve’s prettily-defined arms. For all his training, Bucky wasn’t anywhere near as pretty or as nicely defined as Steve. Steve was just beautiful and that was it. Bucky watched the way his eyes darkened. “And you have a fondness for playing with fire, don’t you?”

“No, I have a fondness for playing with you,” Steve said thickly. “Now, let me up, or we’ll spend tonight like we did yesterday.”

With a regretful sigh Bucky pulled back.

“Give me a shirt to change into?”

“Of course,” Steve climbed from the plush couch and disappeared into the back hall that Bucky now knew led to his bedroom. When he returned, it was with a dark red buttondown that he pressed into Bucky’s hands. Then he kissed his cheek and nodded down the hall. “Go get cleaned up, handsome.”

Bucky titled in for another kiss, smiling into it. 

“I’m not the pretty one here,” he murmured before turning on his heel and double-timing it to the bathroom. Once there, he pulled his soiled shirt off, as well as the undershirt he wore beneath. Both garments somewhat sticky with all the come that had ended up on him. 

Glancing in the mirror, Bucky took stock of his reflection. The skin grafts were healing well, but were shockingly recognizable for what they were, the angular shapes still pink and shiny. As the years went by, he was assured they would eventually match his normal skin color, but for now they were circling his whole left shoulder, spreading over the left side of his chest, and down his scapula on his back. The smaller burn scars on his arm, trailing down to his elbow and lower to his wrist, had been left to heal on their own. The most ironic thing was that to get the skin for the grafts, the doctors had to take it from his thighs. Steve hadn’t noticed how many strange, rectangular scars there were on both his thighs, or at least he hadn’t said anything. Those were small, though, and he mostly had feeling in them. The worst were the grafts. He could feel harder pressure, the nerves in the deeper parts of skin working, but gentle touch? He couldn’t feel it at all. The doctors had said that there was a high probability most of the sensation would come back in time, but Bucky wasn’t holding out hope. Compared to Steve, with all his golden smooth skin and unbelievable proportions, he was certainly not handsome. The thought made him feel even more uncomfortable with being naked with him. The contrast would look monstrous.

Shrugging the new shirt on, Bucky buttoned it up quickly and thought about how Steve loved to be touched, and to touch. He didn’t need to be completely covered with Steve. Bucky had just gotten used to wearing layers. It required some thought on how to show Steve that he wanted his touch, wanted to make him happy. After a moment, he rolled his sleeves up above his elbows, a little uncomfortable with the scars already visible on his forearm. 

Then he looked down at his feet, still in his boots and sighed. That was just bad manners. Sitting on the edge of the tub, Bucky pulled the shoes off, as well as his socks. Balling them, he stuffed them into his boots. After washing his hands and his cock, he put the boots in the corridor and went to join Steve.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dirty talk, relationship negotiation

It had taken Steve a few minutes to find the apron. There wasn’t much call for it, just a few photos for a VIP once who hadn’t done much after the requisite three months was up and he could upload them to the site for his regular members. He had kept it, though, because it was actually a well-made apron. Fine things weren’t to just be thrown out willy-nilly and he was glad he had it now, tucked away in the back of the pantry on a hook.

To be honest, Steve had never done this for any of his actual boyfriends, just get naked and dress up in an apron. The thing that really struck him as he tied it in place was that Bucky _asked_ for the apron to protect Steve’s naked skin, not to get off on the item itself. Well, Steve smirked, they’d see how long that lasted. Bucky seemed unable to get enough of him and even with the apron on, there was a lot of skin showing. It tied it behind his neck, straps leading to the flat front just beneath his nipples. The cloth then covered down to his thighs, but left his ass and back bare. Steve had little doubt Bucky would find the sight arousing.

Of course, Steve found it a little chilly. Getting his supplies for dinner from the fridge left him covered in goosebumps, but the house was generally kept at a warm temperature since Steve honestly disliked clothes in general. He’d only been wearing them at all because Clint and Natasha had been over.

Setting out the pots he needed on the stove, Steve was cutting up the chicken when he heard a strangled sound from the doorway.

“Jesus Christ,” Bucky cursed as he entered the room.

Looking over his shoulder, Steve smiled his most sinful smile, widened his stance, and flexed the muscles in his back and legs. Bucky drew in a hard breath through his nose and Steve felt himself grow tingly with arousal just from the look he was being given. It wasn’t possessive, though it was pure desire in Bucky’s gaze. It was want, but not possession. It made Steve feel alive the way Bucky claimed Steve made him feel.

“You look a little cold,” Bucky said crowding close to Steve, all but plastering himself against his naked back. Steve arched into the warmth radiating from the man and murmured in pleasure as he felt Bucky put his lips on the nape of his neck. His calloused palm slid down Steve’s side, his hip, along his thigh, and then back up, only on the inside of Steve’s legs, making the goosebumps run riot over his skin again.

“Spread your legs a little more,” Bucky asked, resting the other hand on the counter beside Steve and all but covering him with his heat and presence. Steve obeyed, shifting his feet further apart and exhaling as he felt that calloused palm gently take hold of his balls. Bucky was still mouthing at his neck, murmuring quiet sounds of pleasure, his palm stroking Steve’s balls in slow, almost meditative movements. He was getting so much obvious pleasure from just touching Steve it was making him dizzy.

“Bucky,” Steve said warningly, “I have a knife in my hand. You can’t distract me like this.”

Bucky let go of his balls with a gentle squeeze goodbye, as if he wouldn’t ever see them again and put his hand primly on Steve’s hip, over the apron even. He was still mouthing at Steve’s neck.

“Can I pet them when you are done cutting things up?”

“No,” Steve said sternly, though his skin was already aching for more of Bucky’s touch. “Control yourself, mister.”

Bucky made a sweet whining sound into his neck.

“You look…hotter than sin in this getup. I have no idea what made me think this was a good idea.”

“Bucky,” Steve said gently, setting down the knife, wiping his fingers on the first towel that came to hand and turning around. He took his lover’s face in his hands and kissed his nose. “I’m gonna be here after dinner. Tomorrow, for a long while I hope. You’ll have plenty of time to molest me; don’t need to do it all at once.”

Bucky pulled back, his lower lip obviously pushed out in what could only be called a pout, his face adopting the cutest hangdog expression Steve had ever seen in his life.

“By my count, I have so many ideas on what to do with you that it will take roughy a few years to just run through once. That’s not counting all the things you taunt me with,” he said with a kind of whine, but put a little more distance between them, pushing his hands into his pockets. “I will try to behave myself while you cook,” he promised. 

“In that case,” Steve turned around, returning to his food, “I might be willing to reward you with a fantasy or two of my own.” He looked over at Bucky, letting his eyes linger on the exposed skin of his forearms and knowing that was for him. “What do you think?”

“I’m all ears,” Bucky said immediately. “What are you cooking by the way?”

“Chicken and mushroom pasta with asparagus in a tomato cream sauce.”

Bucky made an indecent sound.

“That sounds amazing,” he murmured. 

Smiling, because Steve had a soft spot for men who liked to be fed, he opened his mouth, but froze as Bucky kept talking.

“When I was still serving, I got so sick of the packaged food or the things they served in bases I promised myself I would learn to cook when I got out. Only turned out, if there is one thing I definitely have no talent for and am worse the more I try, it’s cooking. There’s a lot of oatmeal, eggs, and protein shakes in my diet,” he said mournfully.

Steve made a face. It sounded horribly boring and bland.

“Well, when you come over, I’ll make sure you’re fed properly.”

“Food, mostly naked chefs, kinky videos on the side, _and_ promises of dates in the future,” Bucky said, looking at Steve from under his lashes. “I might not want to leave at all at this rate.”

“Might be my secret plan to keep you all to myself,” Steve shot back, feeling his neck flush. “Especially if you like my fantasies.”

“Tell me?” Bucky asked, perching on one of the kitchen stools by the counter.

Glancing over at Bucky, Steve started seasoning the chicken and nodded.

“I said I would. I want you to take me out to dinner, some place fancy, and I want you to give me a hand job under the table. Tease me the whole meal, but in a place I can’t act like anything’s happening.” 

“I think I know the place. Fancy, quiet, but the waitstaff have eyes as sharp as a hawk. They see everything.” He licked his lips. “I would have you sit beside me, wearing no underwear, so that I could just reach in and pull your cock out. I would stroke it ‘til it got hard and then leave it, just out in the cool air, sticking up obscenely naked from your lap. And you would have to act so well, so that nobody saw what was happening. That what you want?”

“Yeah,” Steve said, feeling his body start to heat up again. “Exactly. I want to do that, you take me somewhere, maybe with a vibe in me and you have the remote. Making me act all in control when inside… When it feels so good I can hardly stand it.”

“That place I talked about? They do gourmet days every few months where they serve tiny portions of at least fifteen different dishes. It takes hours for the whole meal,” Bucky breathed out. “Hours with you with your ass full of a buzzing toy and your cock out.”

Steve bit his lip. 

“Hours? Won’t that be…too much?”

“It’s not like the vibe would be on all the time,” Bucky reassured. “You would never know when I would turn it on. And your cock? It wouldn’t matter if you got soft in the meantime, I would just stroke you to hardness again.” Bucky licked his lips again. “The thought of you sitting there beside me, your cock out under the tablecloth, never knowing when I would start torturing you with pleasure. Yeah, that would be really nice.”

“There’s this thing,” Steve said, trying to make his heart rate slow, “A camp, ‘bout twice a year? I’ve been for work, but I think I’d like to go just with you. It’s a BDSM place. Everyone there is into the scene. You could collar me in public, keep me naked all day - except for some shoes, please? - and just…anytime you wanted? Anywhere in the camp. Fuck me, tease me, make me please you.”

Steve turned to look at Bucky and saw him staring at Steve with a slack expression for a long time before he obviously pulled himself together.

“That…” he cleared his throat. “I didn’t even think that… It would require trust.” Bucky changed tack in the middle. “Would you trust me enough for that?”

Surprised, Steve turned to face Bucky fully.

“For what? To know when I’m too tired? To know when it doesn’t matter if I am?” Steve tilted his head to the side. “Bucky, you let me talk to you, guide you through what I want. If I wanted, or needed something, I’d tell you.”

Bucky shook his head, like a wet dog.

“I meant. I know you do videos, but you are totally in control with them. You are the one who comes up with ideas, who vetts them. Time limits, everything is your decision, under your control. If we’re outside of the basement, or your home, if we’re among other people…there would be unexpected factors. People are by nature unpredictable, the risk that something that you didn’t consider before happening would skyrocket.”

“That’s what safewords are for,” Steve said, turning back to the meal preparation. “I trust you completely, that if something went wrong, you’d take care of me. You’d keep me safe.”

“I…” Bucky swallowed. “I would do anything in my power to keep you safe, Steve. I hope you know that. Even if this thing between us didn’t work out, for whatever reason, you have my word that I would always be a phone call away. I don’t have many people I care about, but those I have I protect fiercely.”

“So you would come with me to the camp?” Steve asked.

Bucky huffed.

“Steve, if Tony didn’t give me time off I would probably quit my job to go with you. I liked showing you off for your clients, watching you work, but actually being the person to do things to you while others watch? While they admire how perfect you are? Yeah, Steve, I would come with you.” Bucky laughed a disbelieving laugh. “I might not survive the camp, but I would come with you.”

“Well,” Steve swallowed, “I’ll find out when the next one is. Um, but you _work_ for Tony? You’re not just a friend of his?”

“We’re friends,” Bucky confirmed. “I mentioned before I was a specialist, so the higher ups kept throwing me here and there all the time, never longer than a few months with a team. One of those times, I met Tony. He was still a contractor, then. The stupid, dangerous shit he put himself in was mindblowing. We hated each other so hard we came right out on the other side of the spectrum. Became friends. Then when he got kidnapped, I asked for leave to help search for him. He freed himself in the end, but I tried. We kept in contact. Then my…accident…happened, and next thing I know I am lying delirious in a military hospital. Then Tony is there, shouting abuse at everybody, doctors, nurses, me. 

“He helped with finding the doctors that helped with the damage, wriggled me into some kind of research program that cut down on the costs significantly. When I got out of the hospital, it turned out that no matter how much I dreamed of being discharged, I didn’t know what to do with myself as a civilian. For a while there I even contemplated becoming a mercenary.” 

Steve watched Bucky’s lips twist bitterly and considered going to him, but he was still talking and Steve thought it might be worse to interrupt. The words were just pouring out of him, like no one had ever asked, or maybe that Bucky hadn’t been willing to answer. 

“I was in a bad shape. Tony came through again, offered me a job at his new company. There were dozen other people he could have hired, all as competent as me, but I guess he just wanted to help.” This time Bucky smiled. “Turned out that having a bunch of students to harass and play scavenger hunts with as part of a training routine was just what I needed to get my ass back in gear.

“I owe Tony a favor,” Steve blurted, then winced. As much as he’d enjoyed Bucky’s story, or rather having the man open up to him, it had reminded him of how they’d come to be here and what Steve now owed. 

Bucky frowned.

“What favor?”

“A favor,” Steve muttered. “Tony and I don’t… We’re not _not_ friends?” Steve threw the chicken into a skillet, then the asparagus into a pot to steam before he continued. “We met in the scene. He makes me angry more often than not, but, um. To help me find you, I agreed to a favor. Last few times, that meant either performing at his parties, or being his dom at one.”

The change in Bucky was almost palpable for all that he didn’t change his position. Suddenly the chatty, open man was gone. It wasn’t even anger that Steve sensed from him, but a disturbing intensity that overshadowed everything else. It was almost like Bucky in a scene, so focused and removed at the same time. This had the potential to turn ugly, he realised. He had had no idea Bucky and Tony were friends, or that Tony was Bucky’s boss.

“You slept with Tony?” Bucky asked, his tone not betraying anything, not even curiosity.

“A few times,” Steve admitted nervously.

Bucky opened his mouth and then closed it, swallowing down the first thing he intended to say.

“Say it,” Steve pressed, keeping his voice low.

“I’m jealous,” Bucky admitted straightforward and honest. “It’s easier to know you were with some abstract person than with somebody I actually know.”

“Been with a lot of people, Buck,” Steve said, feeling uncomfortable and vulnerable. Bucky’s opinion mattered to him, and a lot of people judged what Steve had done in his life, not just for a living. “If we go to camp, well, I’ll have probably been with a lot of them, too.”

“I’m not judging you,” Bucky said quickly. “You only had sex with people. I did some horrifying things because I was ordered to. I don’t have a leg to stand on to judge anybody, I just really don’t like the thought of people touching you without my permission.”

“And mine?” Steve teased, because he knew the answer to that already. The mood had just gotten very heavy. Except Bucky grew even more serious then, completely missing the teasing entirely.

“I know it’s not always like that for people in the scene,” Bucky said slowly, “but I can’t imagine having another lover on the side, maybe another sub while I’m with you.”

“Maybe?” Steve said, his voice going hard. The thought of Bucky with anyone else…touching them, the way he touched Steve, looking at them the way he did. It would drive him mad.

“I can’t imagine having a sub without actually being with them, but not all my relationship were in the scene so…”

“So,” Steve said, voice tight, “you think because I’ve been with a lot of people and do this for a living, I won’t want something monogamous? Think I’ll just not bat an eye while you fuck someone else?”

 

Bucky frowned at him.

“I didn’t want to assume anything. I haven’t been in the scene that long, but from what I saw…monogamy isn’t the standard. I can’t just assume I know what you want.”

“You don’t want me with Tony,” Steve snapped, “but you think I’ll be fine with you and someone else.”

Bucky blinked at him.

“Where did that come from? I told you I want exclusivity.”

“And I told you the same, but we’re _talking_ about this and it’s suddenly ‘maybe’ with you.”

“Actually no, you didn’t.” Steve froze, hand outstretched toward the stove, before spinning and staring at Bucky. “You didn’t answer me at all.”

Reaching behind him, Steve set all the burners to low while he stared at Bucky. Then he was across the kitchen, straddling the man’s lap and pushing his hands through Bucky’s long, dark hair.

“Let me make it clear, then,” Steve said lowly. “I don’t share. I get jealous, and angry, and possessive. This?” Steve grabbed Bucky’s hand, laying it on his hip. “This is mine. Your touch? Mine. Is that clear?”

“Very,” Bucky nodded, a small smile on his lips. “I’m game for those rules.”

Steve nodded, letting out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding.

“And I’ll be yours, to apparently give to whoever you please. That’s what you saw the videos as? Giving me away?”

“Yes.” Bucky confirmed. “Don’t get me wrong. If you wanted it, I could work something into our scenes, but I can tell you right now if you wanted it to be physical? It could only be strangers and with very limited permissions. I couldn’t deal with somebody you’re friends with because it would be too close to your having a relationship with them.”

“That’s what you want as all yours, then?” Steve’s heart raced, honest-to-god butterflies in his stomach. “My heart? Very romantic of your, Mr. Barnes.”

“Steve,” Bucky said seriously, “when I told you I wanted to break you and then put you together, I meant everything. Not just the scripted scenes we play together.”

“Everything? What’s everything?”

“Your body, your mind, your heart, your soul. Everything.” Bucky gripped Steve’s hips so hard it hurt. “I want you to give yourself to me, only to me, completely. That is why I don’t think I would like you to…be Tony’s dom while we’re together. As to the performing… I don’t mind if it’s with me, but Tony is my boss and…I would like it if you didn’t.” 

“I still promised him,” Steve reminded, realising he didn’t want to be with Tony like that either.

“Offer me as a dom,” Bucky said darkly. “Tony is absolutely terrified of me as a dom, he will do everything in his power to wriggle out from the deal completely.”

“No,” Steve said gently, “I promised him a favor. I’ll…talk to him,” Steve made a face, “he won’t make me do something I don’t want, or that will affect my relationship.”

“True,” Bucky nodded, “but he’s going to be insufferable about it.”

“So I can tell him?” Steve asked. “About us?”

“Sure,” Bucky agreed, his hands slipping under the apron now and between Steve’s legs. “That would be a good idea actually, since I plan on changing my schedule to match yours for the vids.” He wrapped his palm around Steve’s balls again, giving them gentle, rhythmic squeezes and wrapped his other hand around Steve’s cock. Not even stroking it yet, just holding it in his fist and slowly rubbing his thumb over the soft, sensitive head. It was utterly intimate, Bucky just holding Steve’s cock and balls, not pleasuring him, but reminding Steve that Bucky wanted his complete surrender.

“I’m not so used to this,” Steve whispered. “Not the sex, the rest. You’ve… I’m scared, Bucky.”

“What scares you? I’ll be careful with you, Stevie, I promise.” Bucky stretched out two fingers from the hand he was using to hold his balls and slid them up, over Steve’s perineum, until he put the pads of his fingers at Steve’s hole. He wasn’t trying to push in, he was just touching. Nobody had ever touched him like this, with such obvious pleasure and care.

“Promises promises,” Steve murmured, hating how his mind insisted he be wary when Bucky was being so tender, so sweet. “I haven’t been in a relationship since I was twenty. That’s years, Bucky. I fall too easy, get swept up, and lose myself. It’s been safer…not getting close, but with you I don’t want to stop myself and that’s terrifying, besides that I think I could, just lose myself in you and…I don’t like having to move, or shoot people, but that’s what happens.”

“You will have to tell me that story one day,” Bucky said, “because each time you mention it, it sounds worse.” Bucky’s hands moved from between his legs to rest warm and sure on Steve’s hips. Not moving, just there, connecting them.

Steve laughed weakly.

“Well, it was.”

“Do you often shoot people you disagree with?”

“I wouldn’t call it a disagreement,” Steve said dryly. 

“Well, all you’ve told me is that you shoot people and move places. I get that it must have been something bad, but you seemed equally ready to shoot me too, so... “

Nodding, Steve took a breath. He sat up, spreading his legs further over Bucky’s lap, giving him as much access to his body as he wanted. It was easier than being vulnerable, which said enough about Steve as a person. 

“I grew up in a bunch of foster homes. Ran away from the last one and got in a lot of trouble. The guys I saw… Weren’t the nicest? A few wouldn’t take no for an answer and I did what I had to to get away. Moved, started over, and if that doesn’t work… I enjoy going to the range. It’s fun.”

Bucky’s hands were moving slowly over the outsides of his thighs, not venturing between Steve’s legs again despite the invitation.

“I don’t want to push you to tell me things you don’t want to share,” Bucky said as carefully as if Steve was made of glass. “I needed to know what happened, but if you don’t want to talk about the details, that’s okay.”

“Why do you need to know?” Steve asked, at once hating and loving how careful Bucky was being with him. He shoved his hair out of his eyes. “I’m shit at picking men, and relationships freak me out, isn’t that enough? I just… don’t want you to think it’ll be all smooth sailing. It never is.”

“It was mostly the shooting you kept mentioning that baffled me. I’m used to shooting to kill, to making it a calculated and premeditated act. It’s what I did for years in military. The way you kept mentioning it, almost belligerent and casual at once, was throwing me off as to why. You don’t seem like the type to kill people for fun so…I asked.”

Steve huffed.

“That’s what caught your attention the most? The shooting, not my fucked-up relationships?”

Bucky smiled, slow and a little wicked. 

“I know how to take no for an answer, so I clearly don’t fit the description of your usual guys. The rest? I think I can handle.”

Biting his lip, Steve slid his hands over Bucky’s strong, powerful shoulders. God he always had such a weakness for strong guys.

“What about you? Not the shooting people thing, think you answered that, but past relationships?”

“I haven't been in a serious relationship in…never, probably,” Bucky answered. “Went into the military as soon as I legally could, got promoted really fast, and then suddenly all my missions were classified to hell and back and it’s hard to have any kind of relationship when I would basically get a phone call and be off on the other side of the world by the next morning, not able to say where I was going, what I was doing, or when I was going to be back. Nobody could deal with that, and eventually I stopped trying either.”

“You still gotta get up and go whenever they want?” Steve asked hesitantly. Did he think he could deal with that? Yeah, but he didn’t think he’d be enamored with it.

“No.” Bucky shook his head. “I’m medically discharged. I can’t ever be called back into service. I’m strictly private sector right now.”

Steve’s gaze flicked to Bucky’s left arm and he bit down harder on his lip. 

“And private sector means…? Because,” Steve added quickly, “I know Tony and Nat have teams heading out to some pretty far-flung places.”

Bucky smiled up at him, freer, and looking much more relaxed talking about his current job than his previous one.

“I teach Tony’s people’s advanced city-warfare tactics. It’s security, situational awareness, sleight of hand, disguises, using existing infrastructure, and things like that. I’m located here in New York. It’s the recruits that come to me. Also, don’t be surprised if somebody knocks at your door asking for me. At the start of every month I give my students an assignment they have to complete before the end of the month, and this one is placing a bug on me, all tactics allowed. It’s why I have to go out so much, to actually give them opportunity to get close to me without me noticing. It’s fun, like treasure hunts in the city.” Bucky rolled his eyes. “Well, it’s fun for me. My recruits have other words to describe the assignments.”

Shifting in Bucky’s lap, Steve pulled himself closer to Bucky. 

“I don’t actually leave the house much anymore,” Steve confessed, “but, um, I’d love to go with you? See your trainees in action. Would that be all right?”

“Yeah, I would love it, actually. It’s going to be much more fun going places with company and a lot less suspicious than a single guy loitering here and there. Also, I’m interested in what the guys would think of you, how they will assess you.”

Leaning in, Steve pressed a slow, but searing kiss to Bucky’s lips. He wiggled forward until he could grind his ass down on Bucky’s cock. When he felt him start to get hard, he slipped from Bucky’s lap entirely.

“Let me finish dinner,” Steve insisted.

Bucky leaned back on his stool, both elbows resting against the counter behind him. His legs were spread out wide, jeans stretched tightly over his thighs and his hard cock.

“I can definitely watch and think of things I would do with you,” Bucky said his voice slowly inching lower. “You know that your cheeks are so tight, that when you move I can catch glimpses of your hole?”

“I know I have a great ass,” Steve smirked, giving it a wiggle for Bucky’s benefit.

“You do, and I keep thinking of things to do to it,” Bucky promised. “So yeah, you cook. I’ll stay here and _plan_.”

Grinning, Steve nodded.

“I think this might turn out to be a great relationship.”


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dirty talk, discussion of fantasies, discussion of sex work, chastity devices, cock cage, orgasm denial

After dinner, Steve had taken Bucky to his bedroom again. Bucky didn’t bottom often, not because he didn’t enjoy it, but because most of the people willing to fall into bed with him while he was on the short breaks between missions usually only took him at face value. Big, burly, military, that only wanted to top. They rarely asked, just expected him to be the one to do all the work, and he preferred just to have fun than spend time talking about it. He also enjoyed Steve’s reaction immensely, when he told Steve he could switch it up. The way he had all but choked on his cock was both hilarious and very, very hot.

Steve didn’t disappoint. He was confident, a little playful, and definitely not afraid to push Bucky where he wanted him, to pull his pants and underwear off, then finger him with enthusiastic skill Bucky had found arousing without the pleasure itself. It was all so easy with Steve. Everything just happened so effortlessly. It was, hands down, one of the best experiences he had had bottoming for anyone. He enjoyed the way Steve’s slim, powerful hips felt between his legs, the way he pushed in slow and deep, fucked him with confidence, getting them both off much faster than Bucky remembered with someone inside him. And Steve didn’t just flop down and fall asleep immediately afterwards. He did flop down, but he kept kissing Bucky, touching him, slipping his fingers under the hem of Bucky’s shirt, moving his legs to rub them together, making Bucky shiver. He liked it after, when Steve was drowsy and relaxed, when his ass ached a little from the workout it was unused to, and he could just touch the long, sculpted slope of Steve back, all the way to that stunning ass and back again. It was good that Steve’s ass would need a rest between their games because Bucky wasn’t about to give this up. It had felt way too good.

Finally he had rolled to the side, snagging his laptop and then curling against Bucky again.

“Gotta get some work done,” Steve had explained, surprising Bucky somewhat. 

Now, lying in bed with Steve, curled around him as he lay on his stomach looking through emails on his laptop, Bucky was pleasantly sore. Having the long, firm expanse of Steve’s body to cuddle up with was a treat in and of itself. It was surprisingly nice, honestly, considering Steve was working. 

Except, he realized, Steve had been chewing on his thumbnail for the last minute or so.

“What’s wrong?” Bucky asked, smoothing his hand up Steve’s spine. “Someone send you something nasty.”

 

“No,” Steve assured, glancing from the screen to Bucky, “the opposite. I got a new VIP client. He wants… Well it’s pretty unusual for me and I’m…not sure I can say yes. I’m not hurting for money, mind, but it’s not good business either.

“Well, what’s he want?” 

Steve stared at him, clearly taken aback.

“What?” 

“You really don’t mind my work, do you? And you’re just…just gonna change your whole schedule so you can work with me? Just like that?”

Bucky lowered his eyes for a moment, luxuriating in this feeling of calmness and relaxation he had rarely experienced since he had started his specialised training. 

“My job is not dependant on time. I can do classes in the evenings or in the mornings or even at night. I do them at strange times anyway, just to get the guys used to different conditions. Hell, even to teach them how to manage their body in such a non-ordered worktime. Moving some things around to spend more time with you when it doesn’t affect me in any significant way to do so? Hell yeah, I will. Half of it I’m actually doing, but it’s also that I want to. I like spending time here, with you.” 

Bucky ran his hand down Steve’s back, to his perky ass and lower, to the warm place where his ass changed to his thigh. The skin was very smooth and sensitive there and Steve shivered, shifting ever closer to Bucky. 

“I think that being here while you work is easier, too. If it was something you kept hidden, like a secret, my imagination would eat at me, questions of how and why… Like this, with me being part of it, with me affecting you and your work, I’m not jealous. I don’t feel threatened by it, and I admit I find it very arousing to watch you perform.”

Instead of answering directly, Steve leaned in and kissed Bucky again. Smiling into the kiss, Bucky returned it, fast learning it was easier for Steve to respond with his body than words. A kiss meant he approved of what Bucky was saying or doing. Bucky had to admit, it was a nice reward for just being honest.

“The client wants,” Steve licked his lips, “He wants me to do a staged kidnapping, where he ‘hires’ someone to kidnap me and that someone sends him pictures.”

“Of what?” Bucky asked, feeling a strange knot of…something…rise up in his gut.

“Me tied up, bound and gagged and blindfolded,” Steve answered, “being used by the guy who ‘kidnapped’ me. He’d want all communication between us to be written from the kidnapper. Like they’re partners.”

“Thats…” Bucky trailed off, not sure what to say and not sure his opinion even mattered here. “So that partner would be actually someone you chose, or just a figment of your imagination?”

“The kidnapper?” Steve clarified. When Bucky nodded, he did as well. “That’s the problem. I’d be completely at my partner’s mercy during the shoot. No safeword, no gestures.” Steve’s gaze flicked to Bucky’s lips and then he looked back to the screen. “Not if I was trussed up the way the VIP wants.” 

Bucky tried very hard not to imagine a scene where Steve would be tied up enough that he couldn’t speak, couldn’t indicate he wanted to stop.

“So you don’t like the idea? You don’t have to do anything that upsets you.” 

Bucky was trying to be reassuring, trying to keep his cock out of this and not let himself think of this as a fantasy.

“Oh, I know,” Steve said firmly, “that’s why I like my job so much. I pick and choose what I’m willing to do, not some director, or…whatever. But this? It’s not that…you know, I don’t want to, or I’d hate it, it’s just…a lot of control to give away. Kind of all of it. I could ask for a chaperone, I guess, but…”

“A chaperone?” Bucky asked.

“Someone who stops the scene for me. They’re not involved in the scene itself, but look out for the sub. It’s okay. But it’s really up to the chaperone to decide what’s too much, or too far, not me.”

“And, uh,” Bucky cleared his throat, “who would you be picking as your partner?”

Steve finally looked at him again, lips twitching.

“You really have to ask?”

Bucky wasn’t going to jump to conclusions. He liked what they had done that first day, but it would be Steve’s decision, and he still remembered how fast and much he had scared Steve that first time. If Steve didn’t want him for this, Bucky didn’t think he could blame him.

“I know you have a usual partner,” Bucky said carefully. “But I don’t think I would deal well if he got to have you as vulnerable as you’re suggesting.”

“But you would be okay if I still…used my regular partner?” Steve asked, as careful as Bucky. “Just not for this? Because…I thought we weren’t sharing.”

“I don’t want to share you at all,” Bucky said, way more harshly than he intended, and immediately gentled his tone as Steve’s eyes widened. “I’m aware your work existed before me, and that ultimately I don’t have much say in how you earn your living.”

“But?” Steve prompted.

“But I would hate it if you did use him and you’d have to make very sure I never met the guy in person because I would murder him. Probably,” and god he would, would break every bone he could find, probably twice.

“You…mean that,” Steve said slowly. 

“Yes,” he confirmed. “I don’t share if I’m not forced into it.”

“Bucky,” Steve said, frowning, “I don’t get to lay down all the rules in this relationship. I don’t get to tell you that you have to let me fuck some other guy. That’s not how this works. Business, aside, it isn’t.”

Bucky sighed, rolling them over so that Steve landed on his side, facing Bucky.

“I admit, I am a little confused how this might work. Your work is a part of our relationship, and not a part of it. I don’t know how much I can and can not demand.”

“If it makes you want to commit homicide,” Steve said, amusement in his tone, “then you can demand it.”

Bucky made sure to keep in physical contact with Steve. He’d already noticed that Steve liked it, was more relaxed when Bucky touched him, so he did his best to do it often. 

“I don’t want you to work with anyone else.”

“Okay,” Steve said easily.

Rolling on top of Steve, Bucky trailed his hands down Steve’s sides, to his hips and then lower to get a good grip on his thighs and spread them open in one harsh yank. Steve gasped, head falling back to the bed. His hands reached for Bucky’s shoulders, squeezing them as his breathing hitched.

“I’ll make your clients beg to see more of you,” he whispered, thinking of the way Steve had looked to him with that candle in his hand, his face divine in the moment he had realised Bucky wanted him to drip more wax, wanted him to obey Bucky’s commands, not the script. “I can show off this lush body of yours, that hole that takes in whatever I want to push into it so prettily. I can make you cry and beg so hard throughout it you will feel as if you’re coming out of your skin. I can string you out on ropes, put clamps on your nipples, a hook inside you, and make you beg like you have never begged before. I can see a thousand ways to break you down with pleasure, with orders and the need and show them all the things they _can not have_.”

Eyes wide, Steve squeezed his shoulders, breathing shallowly.

“That’s, I…” Steve closed his eyes. “Slow down.”

“I fucking love talking to you,” Bucky all but snarled, the tension in his belly growing, spreading, becoming something he didn’t yet understand. Steve reacted so beautifully to his words, his eyes so expressive, pale lips parting and a flush rising on his cheeks. He gripped Steve’s thighs harder and pushed them up, folding Steve almost in half, exposing his ass, his soft, smooth balls and his cock, still soft, resting on his belly. “I love how you react to me, it’s the hottest thing I have ever seen in my life.”

“Fuck,” Steve cursed, looking up at Bucky again. “We can talk. Just…let’s talk about this client.”

Bucky nodded, then bent down to systematically, methodically deliver five bites to the insides on Steve’s thighs. First the left one, then the right, watching the pink marks flush lightly and listening to Steve’s hitched breathing before he let Steve’s legs go. He watched with hungry eyes as Steve slowly stretched out on the bed, rubbing his thighs together where the bites probably stung.

“Yeah,” he agreed, lying down beside Steve and shoving his thigh between Steve’s, making those pale, wonderfully long legs rub over his skin again. 

“Um,” was all Steve could manage for a moment. Bucky thought if they hadn’t just had sex, he’d be hard again. “These… This scene. I’d want you to do only what we talked about? I can answer yes/no questions, so I’ll want you to check in with me? Just go or no go.”

“Cat toys,” Bucky said absently, watching the way Steve’s face was still a little flushed, his ears a darker pink.

“Sorry?”

“Small balls with bells inside. If I give you one to hold in your hand, it wouldn’t be visible in any pictures and you could let it fall if you felt the need to safeword.”

“That’s…” Steve stared at him. “Yeah, yeah that’s a great idea.”

Bucky was half-expecting it when Steve surged forward to kiss him. Chuckling, he met him halfway, parting his lips with his tongue and leaving no doubt in Steve’s mind it was his. Only when he’d licked and tasted every bit did he let Steve pull back, both of them breathing hard.

“Okay, um, then we have a general idea of what pictures I want to send, but… But we don’t have to be so strict. I can answer the yes or no questions and I’ll have my safeword.”

“I would blindfold you,” Bucky murmured, watching Steve’s face closely. “Heavy duty blindfold that wouldn’t let anything through. Tie you up like a lamb; arms, legs to a spreader bar. Rip your clothes off of you afterwards, so that threads still remain under the ropes. Get you looking helpless, exposed, ass in the air, knees far apart.” 

Bucky was talking slowly, giving Steve time to respond, to decline some of the ideas, but he wasn’t. He was just side-eyed Bucky and parted his lips, breathing hard and slowly pressing himself closer.

“I guess the idea of the kidnapping is to make a good little fucktoy out of you,” Bucky said sliding his hand between Steve’s legs and taking hold of his balls. He squeezed them as Steve nodded, not hurting him, but definitely holding on stronger that was totally comfortable. “And you wouldn’t be very obedient at first.”

“H-he said if he likes the first batch of pictures, we’d talk about what he wanted next.”

Bucky smiled slowly and leaned down closer to Steve’s face, still keeping that steady pressure on his balls.

“You would have to be taught how to take a good throat fucking at first. After all, a mouth like yours just begs to be wrapped around a cock,” he murmured, bending even closer to Steve’s lips but not touching him anywhere but where he was squeezing carefully.

“Yes,” Steve whimpered, losing all pretense of this being only about work. “I would fight,” his voice trembled a little as he tried to stretch up to kiss Bucky, but Bucky tugged warningly at his testicles, making Steve gasp.

“I would put a spider gag in your mouth, make sure your lips were all nicely stretched out around it, all wet from drool you wouldn’t be able to swallow. This way I would be sure you couldn’t bite, right? I could just fuck your mouth as deep as I pleased, pushing my cock so deep down your throat your nose would be mashed into my pubes, your breathing dependant on when I pulled out.”

“And you’d be rough with me?” Steve said, breathless. “When you fucked me? Showing me my ass was yours now. That my body was yours to use.”

Bucky let go of Steve’s balls, watching the way his breathing changed when he did, listening to the soft exhalation he made at the release of pressure.

“Yes,” he said roughly, both hating the fact he just came, that he couldn’t get hard now and adoring it because it let him extend the talk however long he wanted. “I would push you around, hobble you and make you crawl. Yank your head up by your hair and just stuff my cock inside, no warning, no asking. Just using that throat however I please, and if I thought you didn’t try hard enough?” he rumbled threateningly, making Steve shiver. “I would punish you immediately.”

“I’d be fighting you,” Steve whispered. “How would you punish me? You’d have to remind me that I get no say in what you do to me any more.”

Bucky made a show of looking down Steve’s lovely, sculpted body. Then he took hold of Steve’s soft cock. He didn’t stroke, just held it.

“Since you are just a toy for me, just a hole to be taught good manners, you wouldn’t need this for anything right?” Bucky gave the soft cock a little squeeze. “I would lock you into a cage,” he whispered. “Probably have more than one. Lock you in, put my fingers in you and just massage your prostate. You know what prostate milking is?”

“Yeah,” Steve managed, another shiver running through him.

“It would mean I could make you spill yourself without ever getting hard, without giving you any release. Leave you frustrated and aching, balls completely empty, but not feeling a lick of release. After I did that, I would get my crop out. Stripe your ass, your thighs. Then I would probably use your mouth again, see how well you did after that little lesson.”

“Yeah,” Steve said again. “Yeah, okay. Yes.” Closing his eyes, he somehow gathered himself to return to business. “And…you’d need to take pictures. My mouth around your cock, you beating my ass, my cock caged and you fucking me?”

“I think we would have to make it a series,” Bucky said roughly. “I don’t think you could stand it all in a row, and as hot as you are, me getting it up three times in a scene is unrealistic.” He let go of Steve’s feebly twitching cock. “Besides, only a good hole deserves a proper fucking,”

“Right,” Steve shuddered and shook himself. When he met Bucky’s gaze, they were clearer and his voice firmer when he spoke. “Then take some pictures before we start. To show me off, what you can do to me without my say so.”

“I think we can do it in stages. The cock cage and milking can be a completely separate affair, we would just need to dress you up appropriately.”

Steve narrowed his eyes and bopped Bucky on the nose. It was light, but it took him by surprise.

“I’m not sending multiple emails to a client who’s only paying for the one.”

Bucky blinked at Steve.

“I thought the pictures would be for me, and we would just choose which ones to send to the client?”

That took Steve aback and he leaned away, the starry, glazed look back in his eyes. 

“For you? Like… You would want them?”

Bucky laughed a little, stunned that Steve had to ask.

“I hope the camera will have a large memory card because once I start I will probably take hundreds of pics of you.” Bucky licked his lips. “Like your nipples for example.” Tracing his finger round the nearest one, he smiled. “They are so pale and soft now. If it was cold you would get goosebumps and they would get all hard and would stand out.” He kept rubbing as he talked, watching them harden. “Then I would use a crop on them. Just a little. Just to make you flinch and gasp. Just to make them a little pinker all around. Then I would put the clamp on it. I would like a pretty close-up picture of your chest, how it’s slowly getting pinker. Of your face, the expression on it. Then I would add little weights and watch as everything got red, and then even redder, taking pictures all the time. 

“And don’t even start me on your cock. Caged in cool, unyielding metal, forced into softness while I work at your prostate. I can imagine the way you would twist and squirm and cry. I would pull the gag out of your mouth then, would love to hear the way you would beg for anything, for me to stop, to give you release, anything but the cock cage. You think I wouldn’t take a hundred pictures of your face, twisted in horrible pleasure? God Steve, you would look so beautiful then, all helpless and all mine.”

“Cage me now,” Steve blurted, then blushed. “I mean… You’ll leave soon, right? In a few hours?”

“Will have to go to work eventually, yeah,” Bucky answered, his throat too dry it made his voice sound even rougher than before. “You would like that? If I put a cage on you? Only gave you bathroom permissions and otherwise made your cock mine and only mine? What if I got horny before work and pressed you against the bed, fucked you nice and slow, fucked you ‘til I came and never took that cage off? What if I told you I would only take it off when I came back from work?”

“Not… Not all the time,” Steve admitted, “but tomorrow? Tonight and tomorrow? I’ll take my own pictures, show you I’m locked all day until you come back again. I’ll have been waiting for you until then.”

Bucky spread his palm over Steve’s belly, feeling it shudder. 

“You can plug me too,” Steve offered. “Keep me stretched for your cock all day.”

Bucky lowered his eyes, watching Steve with a half-lidded gaze.

“You think I would let you off so easy?” he rumbled. “I don’t always want you caged. But if I did it?” Bucky chuckled. “You wouldn’t get out of it by just taking pictures, Steve,” he growled. “I would put the cage on you here, at home. I would select the toy I want inside you, but I wouldn’t put it in. I would have you wait for a message from me.” He pressed a little on the quivering belly. “I would make you come to me, find me at my office and _ask_ to have that toy put inside you.”

“Yes,” Steve blurted. 

Bucky moved his hand to Steve’s chest.

“You would have to work for it even then. Caged, in broad daylight, carrying plugs with you because you are just so hungry for my cock. Coming to ask me to put something inside you. I would have you work for it Steve, would have you suck me off before I ever consented to bending you over my desk, fingering you lose enough you would beg for release, then stuffing you full with a toy and sending you back home.”

“Bucky,” Steve whined.

“No?” Bucky asked, trailing his fingers along Steve’s ribs. “Which parts would you choose then? You can’t have it all.”

“No,” Steve agreed, looking relieved. “That would be too much. The original. Cage me tonight, put anything you want in me tomorrow. I’ll wait for you.”

Bucky closed his eyes for a moment. He really wanted to, wanted to play with Steve right then and there, but he knew Steve’s ass needed a rest today.

“I was serious when I said your ass needed a break,” he repeated aloud, swallowing his arousal. “But if you want to play, I want you in your collar. I need to know you are ceding power to me. That it’s not just all talk. Because it can be all talk, if you want. I will never get angry at you for just indulging my fantasies and not actually wanting to live them.”

Steve blinked, then smiled slowly. 

“Okay, I’ll go get it,” Steve said.

Bucky gently smiled back at Steve and shifted against his lover’s body, just to make Steve feel him. 

“I like the collar on you, it makes me think of sex, of having you, of possessing you. The sight of it makes me expect different things than when I see you without it.”

“It’s like that for me, too,” Steve murmured. “It’s easier to let go with it on. To just…be yours. Do what you want, let you do what you want to me.” Steve swallowed. “That’s why I’m gonna…always tell you what I think of what you say. So you know what I want and don’t, and you won’t have to worry about hurting me.”

“I’d like that,” Bucky shifted closer to Steve. “I love watching you obey me, but I love that it’s you obeying, not a mindless, will-less creature. It’s what draws me in, the fact that you obey with all that fire burning up in you.”

This time, when Steve leaned in to kiss him, Bucky didn’t pull back or try to control it. He let Steve kiss him and pull back and slide from the bed. He got comfortable while watching Steve go, smiling to himself. All the worries he had had just hours before were gone, replaced by sated contentment. He wasn’t expecting Steve to offer to play so soon, but oh, he wanted to. He wanted all that wonderful flesh and spirit stretched under his hands. He loved it, loved the he could touch Steve, could make him accept the pleasure and the comfort of the pain he offered. There was something intoxicating in the way Steve responded to him, intoxicating and humbling at the same time. Even after just only a few days, he felt truly protective of the man, invested at a level he had never felt before.

Steve was back in the bedroom in just a few minutes, the collar held loosely in his right hand, something else hidden in his left, probably the cage. Smiling himself, Steve came to the bed and knelt at Bucky’s side as he sat up in bed. The collar was offered to Bucky in his outstretched palm. Bucky took it, turning the soft leather in his hands. The black ring was supple, the metal rings placed at four points just as he remembered, and a simple clasp beneath one. Without comment, Steve waited, still kneeling, but not rushing him. He was so beautiful, naked and eager, and he was all Bucky’s.

Reaching for Steve’s neck, Bucky ran his fingers along the long column of skin.

“Such a gorgeous neck. I love putting the collar on you Steve,” Bucky admitted as he took the collar and wrapped it around the offered throat. “Thank me when I’m done,” he instructed softly as he locked the collar into place.

“Thank you, sir,” Steve answered, eyes fluttering and a shiver raising goosebumps along his shoulders.

Bucky smiled gently.

“I’m very lucky to have met you.” He hooked his finger under one of the rings and pulled lightly, making Steve tilt toward him. “You are very good to me. Show me the cage now,” he added as he released the collar and Steve swayed back into place.

Again Steve held out his palm. The cage was a simple, surprisingly so for someone with the amount of toys and equipment Steve owned. Four steel bands would cage the sides of Steve’s cock, connected by three steel bands at the base, middle, and about the head. Another ring connected to the cage that would sit behind Steve’s balls, connecting them, and a lock, so it couldn’t be removed without the key, which was also sitting in Steve’s palm. He hefted it in his hand, feeling the weight of it. It was solid, the metal a good quality. It looked secure and easy to hide under Steve’s clothes. 

“Why this one?” Bucky had to ask. He had seen many cock cages online and he had genuinely expected something flashier from Steve.

“That’s custom, sir,” Steve answered. “I can wear it as long as you want me to and it won’t pinch or rub.”

Heat pooled in his belly at the thought of actually making Steve wear it for longer.

“Oh, Steve,” Bucky murmured, his mind a tornado off images and ideas. The funny thing was he couldn’t decide which he wanted to actually happen, and which he just wanted to describe to Steve to see that shivery, doe-eyed look in his eyes. “I can’t imagine anyone else doing what you do to me. The things you offer… They, _you_ are so perfect.”

“Thank you, sir,” Steve murmured, a light flush staining the tips of his ears.

Bucky took a moment to appreciate how adorable Steve was, before getting down to the task at hand.

“Lie down on your back,” Bucky directed, rolling to the side so Steve could lie back across the covers, his long body displayed for Bucky’s pleasure. 

Without being asked, he placed his arms above his head, stretching his torso and making his pecs stand out, displaying his arms in all their glory, the corded muscles in them just delightful to see. Bucky took in the soft, eager look on Steve’s face, his collared throat, beautifully presented chest, and his his soft cock lying invitingly against his thigh. 

Bucky took it in hand and watched as Steve’s belly twitched.

“Don’t get hard,” he teased, giving the cock a little squeeze. “You won’t fit if you do.”

“I won’t, sir,” Steve promised. “I can’t,” he added quietly.

Smiling at Steve, Bucky reached for the cage.

“I guess we’re lucky,” Bucky said. “I’m really looking forward to putting this on you.”

Slowly, Bucky fit the metal cage over Steve’s cock, careful not to pinch the delicate flesh. The metal slid on easily, fitting onto Steve’s soft length like a glove. The rung under his balls was a tighter squeeze, making Steve shiver, inhaling shakily as the two pieces connected. Clicking the tiny lock into place, Bucky felt a rush of warmth in his stomach, knowing that so long as he had the key in his hand, Steve’s pleasure belonged to him. 

“All done,” Bucky said, his voice hoarse. He was glad he couldn’t get hard because he would have most probably lost his mind. “You look so pretty,” he breathed, running his fingers over the cage and the slivers of flesh he could feel between the bars of it. “All caged, mine, unable to come until I allow it.”

“Yes, sir,” Steve said, breathy and slow. When Bucky looked up at his face, Steve was still doe-eyed and shivery, watching him with the softest of expressions.

“You did good,” Bucky praised, wishing there was something more physical he could do to let Steve know how much he loved his sweet submission.

“What do you want to do with me now, sir?”

Bucky ran his hand over the hard swell of Steve’s chest, down his trembling stomach, to his caged cock. The bars left enough room he could feel the heated flesh beneath the cool steel bars as he petted it admiringly.

“I want to cuddle you, lie under the covers and know this is here. That you’re caged for my pleasure and that you can feel the weight of the cage every time you move.” Bucky leaned forward, brushing their lips together twice before pulling back. “Just knowing you have it on for me is mind-blowing.”

Bucky kissed Steve again, gently manhandling him until they were both beneath the coverlet When he had Steve tucked into his chest as the little spoon, their legs tangled together, he wrapped his arm over Steve’s waist, then slid his hand down Steve’s stomach to take the cage in his hand again and again. He loved it, loved the feel of it, the weight and the meaning behind it. That Steve had _given_ Bucky control of his orgasms; had asked for it.

Though he had told Steve he was going to fuck him and leave him like this in the morning, he probably wouldn’t. The thought of taking Steve, thrusting into him and taking his pleasure while Steve was unable to get hard, his erection prevented from even forming, was a turn-on like no other. Yet, Bucky didn’t want to deny Steve pleasure needlessly. He thought he’d let him out, suck him off into an orgasm, continue while his cock was slowly softening, making him whimper with the over-stimulation. Then, when Steve was completely soft, he would cage him again. Lock him back up so he couldn’t get hard, couldn’t touch himself, and had the very real reminder that his body belonged to Bucky. Maybe he would call Steve into his work with a bag full of toys. Maybe he wouldn't, leave Steve waiting for him all day. It was so hard to decide, but each choice seemed sweeter than the last.

Pressing his lips against Steve’s neck, Bucky closed his eyes, letting himself dream of the man he held in his arms.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter tags: cock cage, cuckolding, forced feminization, dom!Bucky, dom!Steve (but not with Bucky), accidental voyeurism, boys in lingerie, denial, appearance of dubious consent (though no ACTUAL dubious consent or blackmail), computer dominance, porn

Bucky shouldn’t have expected to wake wrapped around Steve, since it was only the second time they’d slept together, but he had. The alarm hadn’t gone off, but his body was accustomed to getting up at certain times. Opening his eyes, he wondered where Steve had gone, but didn’t see him in the nicely-decorated room. He did see his collar, set on the nightstand. The collar wasn’t his, he hadn’t bought it, but he still felt a rush of warmth at the sight of it. He hadn’t ever thought he would find a connection with a man he had met so accidentally. At the same time, that warmth was tinged with regret that the collar was off. He didn’t necessarily want Steve to be submissive to him all the time, but he knew he would have liked to take it off Steve himself. 

As Bucky swung his feet to the floor, he froze, hearing someone speaking somewhere in the house. Steve, he assumed, and slipped into his pants before heading down the hall, following that voice. A soft chuckle, and the soldier in Bucky relaxed, recognizing that it _was_ Steve. He didn’t make his progress any louder though, not wanting to startle Steve, or bother him if he was working.

“Jason -” Steve said, like he was trying to interrupt someone. “Jason -”

Whoever it was must not have stopped as Steve fell silent. The door was open, so Bucky stepped in even though he hadn’t been in this particular room yet. It was the kind of study one expected of a professor, or lawyer, all heavy leather, dark wood, and old books covering the shelves. It _wasn’t_ Steve, but then again, Bucky was getting used to how separate his lover liked to keep his personal and business lives. Steve wasn’t wearing anything Bucky was used to, either. Usually he liked a relaxed look, or was comfortable being naked. Seeing him now had Bucky reassess, it was so _different_. He was wearing a black turtleneck, smooth and expensive, paired with tailored, black slacks. The black cloth of the turtleneck only served to highlight his tight, muscular build, but in a different way than Steve’s usual nakedness. In a way this was almost more intimidating. His hair was slicked back, not much, but enough to give him a severe look that suggested age and experience. 

The sharp angles of his face, compared with the austere clothing, made Steve look like a completely different person. For a second Bucky wondered if he would even recognise Steve on the street if he saw him in passing. There was a difference to his posture, a straight and stiffer way he held his spine and the angle of his jaw. Bucky had to admit he loved the image. The severity of it, how original Steve looked. 

Bucky rested his shoulder against the doorframe, feeling a slow pooling of warmth in his belly. He liked the well-put-together look with a hint of danger. There was a reason he had been a soldier for so long; he found danger attractive. Watching Steve now, all he could think was peeling him out of all those nice clothes only to dishevel him again.

“Jason.” This time, Steve said the name with a dark, firm tone that Bucky hadn’t heard before. It was deeper and commanded attention. “It doesn’t much matter to me what you’re comfortable with. I’ve told you what I want, and you know the consequences of misbehaving. Or do we have to discuss what I have?” Steve leaned back, but Bucky couldn’t see his expression. He could, however, see his computer screen, which was a webcam of someone’s bedroom. “Yes, Jason, all _those_ pictures,” Steve clicked on something, “Everything I can send to your work… your mom…”

Bucky blinked. Was Steve blackmailing somebody? He stared, surprised, but to his shame not necessarily alarmed. Damn, he was soft on this guy. He shifted, so that he could see more of the computer. By now, Steve had to be aware of his presence, but he didn’t react, didn’t turn his head to acknowledge him at all.

“I want you to put them on. Then come stand in front of the camera so I can see.” Steve chuckled. “Of course I’m controlling your webcam.”

Steve was threatening a guy for sex? Now Bucky straightened, briefly offended before the obvious conclusion hit him. Steve had said before, hadn’t he? He was not _only_ subbing for his clients, but also dominating them.

Bucky relaxed back against the doorframe once more, letting the tension he’d been unaware of melt away. It was work. Steve was _working_. That probably explained the look, too.

The leather of Steve’s chair creaked as he leaned back, the room completely silent as Steve waited for his client to put on whatever he’d been instructed. He didn’t even glance at Bucky, making Bucky wonder if he really did know he was there or not. Deep down, he was starting to feel a bit of jealousy, too, because Steve didn’t dress like this for Bucky. And Bucky liked his look very much, even if he mostly wanted it on the floor.

Finally, something moved on Steve’s monitor, and a young man with long, auburn hair stepped into frame wearing a lacy, white thong and holding a phone to his ear. This Jason guy screamed submissive, his body language soft and non-threatening, though the way he carried himself in the feminine clothes held an edge of shame. Bucky watched him critically, but did not feel attracted to him, not when there was Steve just in front of him. In comparison, the other man was a pale shadow. He was surprised by the lack of jealousy. A lot like it was with Steve’s internet doms; Bucky was curious, willing to watch, even if this dominant role felt less intimate than his submissive role. 

Bucky decided to watch, curious to see how Steve reacted to the scene. When he subbed, there was the purely physical enjoyment of the sex, and Bucky could see what he got out of it. He wondered how this would affect Steve. 

Steve smiled and purred, “That’s my girl. You look so pretty.” The guy said something, Bucky watched his mouth move, but couldn't hear anything. Steve’s shoulder relaxed, his voice holding that dark, velvet softness. “You’re welcome. And you’re going to be my pretty girl all day, aren’t you?”

Jason nodded on the monitor, staring down at his feet and Steve smiled like he’d accomplished something.

“I expect regular pictures, Jason. You’d better not take them off; you have to start getting used to being my girl.”

The guy on the screen visibly shuddered and Bucky could see he was getting hard, straining the fabric of his underwear. Ashamed, but definitely getting off on this entire situation. Bucky was far more interested in Steve’s reaction, though, only keeping an eye on Jason so he could interpret Steve’s reactions. He was still, no squirming of any kind, but there was a hint of tension in his muscles that suggested he did want to move. In this role, he wouldn’t squirm, but Bucky wondered if he came up to him and put his hand down between Steve’s legs, would he find him hard?

“You’re going to be good for me, aren’t you, pretty baby?” Steve said and Jason nodded, hard and eager, but Steve tutted and his voice turned hard once more. “That’s not what you call me. I _thought_ you were going to be good.”

Jason stumbled toward the camera, babbling, and Steve closed his eyes, taking a deep, long breath. Yeah, Bucky guessed, he’d be _very_ hard, but he wasn’t letting his client know.

Bucky knew he wouldn’t do anything to actually endanger Steve’s work, but it didn’t mean he couldn’t imagine going to him, sliding his palm around the bulge of Steve’s cock and squeezing. Just hard, steady pressure while Steve tried to keep the calm, controlled tone of voice. He would love to see Steve try, to see him struggle desperately to keep what Bucky was doing out of his voice. Maybe he would get Steve to get up and lean against the desk one day, open his pants and slowly, slowly push himself inside Steve. Then they would sit in the chair, his cock inside Steve, making him just feel it while he worked. He wondered if Steve could keep that even, dark tone then.

“If you’re very good for me all day, I’ll forgive you,” Steve said, “Now, you’re going to be late for work if you don’t get ready.” Before Jason could respond, Steve said, “Goodbye, pretty baby,” and hung up his end.

Bucky loved the way Steve sounded.

Whirling around in his chair, Steve smiled at Bucky, proving he _had_ known he was there. There was some trepidation to it, though, and that Bucky didn’t like. 

“I like the outfit.” 

Bucky’s own voice was gravely enough it was clear he’d been thinking of sex. The way Steve relaxed said Steve wasn’t oblivious.

“Then I’ll have to wear it if we ever go on a date,” Steve said, standing and striding around the desk to Bucky. In the way that Bucky loved, Steve wrapped himself around him, like he belonged, and held him close.

“If it’s a short date,” Bucky murmured, putting his hands on the exquisite wool-blend pants stretched over Seve’s slim hips. So smooth and well tailored. He ran his fingers from the hard hipbone to the wonderfully perky ass. He had never seen an ass so perfect, or so small on a man so large.

“Mmm.” Steve’s head lowered, his blue eyes finding Bucky’s from beneath his long lashes, “then I’ll wear it next time I want to get laid.”

Bucky laughed roughly.

“You will get laid, yes,” he confirmed, moving his palms up Steve’s sides, wanting to feel for himself if the turtleneck was as soft and warm to touch as it looked. The weave was tight and silky. He paused with his palms over Steve’s ribs, just feeling them expand as Steve breathed in and out, the bones shifting under the skin, smooth and powerful. Bucky licked his lips and moved his right hand to Steve’s chest, outlining the hard pecs and palming the nipples, now visibly hard under the stretched fabric.

“Seems I won’t have to wait,” Steve murmured, growing breathless.

“I liked your voice.” Bucky slid his hand down the center of Steve’s chest until he could palm Steve like he’d imagined earlier, and then froze, his mind short-circuiting. He had expected Steve to be hard, but that wasn’t what he felt. Sure, he trembled in Bucky’s grip, but he was soft, steel bands ensuring he could get aroused, but not physically.

“You kept it on,” Bucky breathed.

“Of course I did,” Steve squirmed, leaning heavily into Bucky’s embrace. “You have the key. _You_ decide when I get off.”

Bucky couldn’t help himself, he let his fingers explore the hard lines of the cage under Steve’s clothes. He didn't know how much of it Steve could actually feel, but Bucky loved it. Loved the feel of the steel hidden so sneakily under the elegant clothes, adored the knowledge that Steve’s cock was there, trapped in the unforgiving metal, because Steve had chosen to keep the cage on.

“I loved the way you sounded when talking to Jason,” Bucky murmured, covering the cage with his hand and wondering if Steve could feel the heat of his palm though the layers he wore. “It made me think dirty thoughts.”

And oh, while his previous fantasy had been hot enough, the knowledge he could slip into Steve while Steve was still locked in the cage was a thousand times hotter.

“Bucky, you’re just _always_ thinking dirty thoughts.” 

“I used to be a professional; a serious man,” Bucky murmured, stretching his fingers so that he could reach deeper between Steve’s legs, making Steve shift them apart to accommodate him. “And then I met you,” he looked at Steve’s face, the pale flush slowly creeping up his face. “You got off on Jason.”

“Yes,” Steve admitted.

“You get off on all your clients,” he squeezed, lifting his hand up, so Steve had to go onto his toes.

Steve gasped Bucky’s name, eyes fluttering closed, before he blurted, “Usually. I-I did tell you, I like sex.” Bucky hummed, letting off the pressure and switching to gentle stroking of the inside of Steve’s thigh. God, Steve’s legs were so long and so damn graceful. Bucky was in good shape himself, but he was never so perfectly proportioned as Steve. “I get off on you, too.” Steve swallowed. “You’re not a client.”

Bucky smiled, happy that Steve had given him a compliment.

“What do you want right now?” he murmured, stroking first one, then the other thigh. He could feel the tension beneath his fingers, in those tight, smooth muscles that he wanted to bite all over, leaving a trails of marks that would last for days, or even weeks.

“Please, fuck me,” Steve groaned instantly, as if he’d been waiting to be asked. “Please. I need it so bad, Buck.”

“What if I didn’t take off the cage?” He encircled one of Steve’s thighs, at least as much as he could and squeezed. It was probably painful, but Bucky wanted to mark Steve so badly right now. Steve’s breath hissed on the way in, but he didn’t pull away.

“Okay,” Steve breathed out, “just… please fuck me.”

Bucky smiled, leaning in to drag his growing scruff over the side of Steve’s cleanly shaved face.

“Bucky, please,” Steve begged.

“I can’t refuse you when you look so hot,” Bucky admitted and then pressed his lips to Steve’s ear. “Bring me the lube.”

Instead of walking past Bucky, Steve just turned around and practically ran to the desk. He leaned over it, instead of walking around, and Bucky got a long look at Steve’s ass as he bent over, yanked open a drawer, and fumbled inside it. It was perfect, the perfect position, and Bucky growled, “Stay there.”

Instantly, Steve froze, then slowly lifted the lube and set it on the desk by his hip.

“Those pants are sinful,” Bucky murmured, moving behind Steve and putting both palms on the prettily-displayed ass. With two handuls of it, he squeezed, massaged, and then did his best to spread Steve’s cheeks though the cloth. He knew it wasn't anything but a tease, but he did love that ass beyond measure.

“Open your pants,” he ordered.

Bucky slid his hands up to Steve’s shoulders, closing one hand over the back of Steve’s neck, then grabbing roughly. He gave Steve space to move, but kept that hand on his nape. Bucky loved this position. It let him be rough without threatening to obscure Steve’s breathing, and had the added bonus of eliciting a low moan from Steve.

As Steve fumbled for his fly, Bucky kept the pressure. Steve let out another low, needy sound. It was a subvocal whine of pure need, and it got Bucky so hard it hurt.

“I’m very considerate,” he murmured pressing his nose into Steve’s short hair, inhaling the scent of his skin and the gel he used. “I’m letting you take your nice slacks off before I fuck you stupid.”

“Thank you, sir,” Steve said shakily as his pants slid off his legs to pool on the floor. He kicked them away while Bucky pressed his fully clothed body to bare skin and broad back. Bucky loved the contrast in their clothing. Him fully dressed, but in sweats and a long-sleeved tee. Steve in his nice clothes but already half naked. 

“The turtleneck stays on,” Bucky whispered, opening his mouth and dragging his open lips against the side of Steve’s face. “I like how it makes you look.”

“Jesus,” Steve whispered, shivering hard enough Bucky felt it.

Bucky reached his free hand around Steve and ordered, “Put some lube on my hand.” 

He didn’t let go of Steve’s nape, but eased his grip before tightening it again. Like he would have done with his teeth. Let go and bite again, and again and again. Steve’s breath was hitching with every squeeze, but he did as Bucky wanted and poured a generous amount of lube onto Bucky’s fingers. Bucky didn't waste time. Encouraged by both Steve’s experience and the clear signals that teasing wouldn’t be appreciated, he slid his wet fingers between Steve’s tight cheeks. He circled Steve’s tightly furled rim, before slowly pressing in two digits at once. Steve moaned, going up on his toes before sinking back against Bucky’s fingers, taking them deeper. 

Huffing a breath at the sensation of velvet heat wrapped about his fingers, Bucky let himself just enjoy the moment. He loved this, loved being inside Steve in any way possible.

“You are so hot inside, taking my fingers so prettily,” he whispered against Steve’s skin, mouthing at whatever he could reach: Steve’s cheek, his neck. “You want it so badly.”

“Yes, god.” Steve was gripping the edge of his desk so hard his knuckles were turning white, “Please, Bucky. Don’t tease me.”

Bucky hoped there was enough lube because he didn't want wait any longer. He fucked his fingers into Steve only a few times before pulling them out. Steve wasn’t the only one eager here, and Bucky pushed his sweats down despite his wet hand. He used what lube was still on it to slick up his cock, hard for so long now. He licked his lips, looking down to guide his cock into Steve’s wet hole. He couldn’t tear his eyes away as his head pressed against the little hole and vanished as he pushed. 

The sensation of breaching Steve’s body and feeling the pressure, heat, and pure pleasure was only heightened by being able to see himself sinking inside Steve so clearly. Bucky panted softly as he bottomed out, listening to the sweet sounds slipping from Steve, tiny moans, groans, and gasps. 

Keeping his hand on Steve’s neck, he circled the other around Steve’s waist to pull him closer. He didn’t go slow, sinking in and then starting a quick, pace that left Bucky drowning in pleasure and the heat of Steve. Every thrust forced a cry from Steve’s throat as he sank completely inside, and Bucky was consumed with the knowledge that he was giving Steve as much pleasure as he felt, but Steve couldn’t get off. 

Pulling back, he grabbed Steve’s thigh and pulled, kept pulling until Steve got the hint and put his leg on the desk. Then he leaned back, thrusting in hard and peering between them so he could watch Steve’s balls and soft cock swing back and forth. It was the hottest thing he remembered seeing in a long while, Steve soft and caged while Bucky was fucking him harder and harder, climbing the edge of his pleasure, skirting closer and closer to orgasm. 

“You so pretty, so fucking hot like this,” he gasped, mind already lost to pleasure.

It was amazing, knowing that Steve was giving this - his entire body - to Bucky. He couldn’t come, crying out with every thrust, as his body swayed and jolted. Yet it was all for Bucky, every thrust, every cry. Steve was his, completely, unable to do anything but take what Bucky gave. Unable to do anything but feel, enjoy his fucking, as Bucky took his pleasure.

And he had _wanted_ this.

The orgasm took Bucky by surprise, breaking over his body like an avalanche and pulling him under. He clung to Steve as his body spasmed, his cock pulsing jets of come into his lover. He could see that Steve was still soft in his cage, that all he could focus on was the sensation of Bucky coming inside him, only made the orgasm last longer and feel sweeter.

Bucky came down from it slowly, buried deep inside Steve, plastered all along his back, and panting into his sweaty neck. He gave Steve’s neck a lick as he regained his senses, making Steve whimper. Relaxing the hand locked tightly over Steve’s hip, he dropped it lower, to the cock cage. The metal was blood warm and unyielding under his fingers, but still he explored it, feeling Steve’s cock beneath. The heated flesh was as soft as he’d imagined and Steve twitched and shuddered as Bucky explored. Sensitive, then, but there were only a few drops of wetness at the tip.

“You must be so sore,” Bucky purred.

To Bucky’s surprise, Steve shook his head.

“Aches, a little,” Steve gasped, not having caught his breath yet, “but it isn’t sore. That was… God, that was perfect, Buck.”

Further surprised, Bucky squeezed Steve’s cock and balls gently.

“You don’t want -”

“No,” Steve shook his head and sighed, then slumped fully against the desk. “No, that was… No.”

“What if I want to make you?” Bucky asked, more curious than anything else.

Steve chuckled, then wiggled and Bucky realized he’d stopped petting his cock. 

“I’d tell you no, very firmly.” Steve looked back at him and smiled, almost sleepily. “Later. I want to think about you inside me all day, and wait to have you fuck me when you come back.”

“Inside you?” Bucky repeated, feeling his brain switch off once more.

“Mmm,” Steve hummed. “Need you to get me a plug, handsome.”

The thought of having his come locked inside Steve for the day was enough to make Bucky’s cock twitch helplessly. Just when he thought Steve couldn't get any hotter, Steve went and blew his mind again. God, if he could, he would fuck Steve again right there and then. 

“Hands on the table,” he said hoarsely, pushing gently between Steve’s shoulder blades  
to make him bend over. With a loud thump, Steve’s leg slid off the desk as he obeyed, flattening against the wood. “Good.” Petting Steve's balls, he ordered, “Don’t move,” while making his voice as low as possible.

Bucky didn’t wait for Steve to respond. He was quick in returning to Steve’s bedroom where that drawer he’d seen Steve open held all those toys. There were more than he expected when he opened it. Bucky chose one of the smaller plugs, the kind that could be worn for longer periods of time, and hurried back to the office before his come could leak out of Steve too much. 

The sight of Steve, in his expensive turtleneck, his hair still pristine, but bare from the waist down with a trail of slickness between his cheeks, was one Bucky wanted to capture in his mind forever. Steve didn’t appear the same as in their previous scenes, he lacked a certain softness, but Bucky didn't care. He loved it anyway.

He loved _Steve_ anyway.

“Lube,” he demanded as he stepped back behind Steve.

Without comment, Steve passed him the bottle. Bucky slicked the plug quickly. It gave him a thrill to reach for Steve again and spread his cheeks with his fingers to expose his pink, puffy hole. Bucky licked his lips and pressed the tip of the black toy against that vulnerable entrance, then fed it in as slowly as possible, drawing this out since he knew their morning was coming to a close. He had work, and Steve had… whatever Steve did during the day. 

At last it snuggled into place, and Steve let out a long, contented sigh. Bucky had to smile. As much as he’d been ordering Steve about, he was pretty sure this moment, and even the sex, hadn’t been about him. Not that he was going to let that ruin his fantasy. 

“You gotta go to work?” Steve asked, slowly easing to his feet and just as slowly turning around. 

Bucky sighed.

“Yeah.” He couldn't postpone it any longer. Already he had dropped his usual overtime because he couldn’t get himself to leave Steve for long. He had to work his contracted hours at least.

“When will I see you again?” Steve asked, still half naked and thoroughly distracting.

“Tonight, if you want.”

Bucky put his hands on those slim hips again, thumbs sliding over the smooth, golden skin in careful circles. The cock cage looked so innocent and dirty at the same time, hanging there between Steve’s legs.

Humming with pleasure, like a cat purring at being petted, Steve closed his eyes.

“I want. Wanna think about you all day, plugged and caged and knowing you’ll be coming home to reward me with your dick.”

Bucky exhaled shakily.

“Jesus,” he pulled Steve closer, pulling them flush against each other, feeling Steve’s cage press against his thigh. “You are going to be so bad for my ability to focus at work. So bad.”

Smiling wickedly, Steve didn’t seem at all chagrined.

“Just you wait and see, handsome. It might be worse than you think.”

Bucky smiled, leaning in for a kiss, their first since he’d woken up. Steve kissed back just as eagerly, wrapping his arms around Bucky’s neck and licking at Bucky’s lips. Bucky lost himself in this, in exploring Steve with his tongue, and the feel of his body pressed against him. Big, warm palms slid against his shoulders as Steve pulled him closer still. They kissed like they hadn’t just gone at it like bunnies, like they couldn't bear to separated.

It was so easy with Steve. Unlike any other lover or sub Bucky had tried to be with since his discharge, Steve wasn’t afraid. He didn’t find Bucky’s bursts of possessiveness threatening. Beyond that first misstep, Bucky’s tendency to go for a weak spot hadn’t been a deal-breaker. At the same time, Steve’s confidence in himself was calming. He didn't need to worry so much if his partner had his limits already mapped out and knew exactly what he wanted.

“Go,” Steve murmured against his lips, “before I keep you here. Make you one of my kept boys.”

“I want to lick you through the cage,” Bucky blurted, reaching down to cup Steve’s caged cock again. It was so warm, so smooth.

Steve laughed, then gave Bucky a hearty shove, smiling at Bucky like sunshine.

“ _Go_ ,” Steve said again. “You don’t strike me as the kind of man that likes to be kept. Go,” Steve pushed himself back onto the desk, gaining distance from Bucky while making himself more vulnerable and spreading his legs, “and _come back_.”

“Oh,” Bucky hummed taking a slow step back, never taking his eyes off Steve. “I _will_ be back. That’s a promise.”

\----

Bucky did not crash his car on his way to work, which was a mild miracle considering how much he was not focused on driving. His head was full of Steve: not just the sex they’d had, not all the wonderful things Steve had done for him, or with him, but the ease with which it all happened. Being in Steve’s company was relaxing and stimulating at the same time. Bucky felt safe in a way few people could inspire. Usually, people found him too intense, too ‘other’, unfit for civilian company, but no longer kin to the soldiers he knew. It left him adrift, too rough for normal life, too soft for the one he’d left behind. The effort of trying to fit in either way only fried his patience and made him grumpy beyond measure. With Steve, none of that mattered. They talked and played, and it was so _easy_. Bucky had no idea he could feel this way with a lover, certainly he never had before.

He arrived at work a little late, preoccupied with his thoughts of Steve. It took Cloria, the office assistant, clearing her throat loudly to get him to finally focus and the stack of papers she was holding.

“Schedules.” Cloria pushed another stack at him. “Assessment forms.” Another, thicker than the last. “Possible job applications.” She piled them into his arms as the woman glared at him from behind her glasses. That was normal, though. Cloria always glared at anyone performing at less than two hundred percent efficiency. If allowed free reign, she would have reorganised half the country before they’d realised what was happening. Bucky had no idea where Tony had found her, but she was absolutely perfect to work with ex military; like a tiny, extra-grumpy drill sergeant in five inch heels and a grey pantsuit.

“On it, ma’am,” Bucky promised, hauling his bundle toward his office as a thought occurred to him. Instead of attending to the paperwork, he pulled out his phone and shot Steve a text.

 **Bucky** : Now that I think of it, being in the military is a lot like being a kept man. You do what you are ordered to do, and you are provided for in exchange.

Since he wasn’t expecting a response, he set the phone down and had to almost immediately pick it up again when it chimed.

 **Steve** : Honey, you wanna be my kept man, you say the word.

Bucky barked out a short laugh, surprised and delighted in a way he wasn’t expecting. Not many people looked at his face, at his scars, and offered to take care of him. Before he could think anything else, though, Steve sent another text.

 **Steve** : Though I meant what I said. You don’t seem like the type. You seem like the type that needs to be doing something, to always be on, and would hate sitting on my couch all day

 **Bucky** : I like teaching the guys how to survive

It was surprising Bucky had typed it out, but it surprised Bucky even more when he hit send. Yet, he kept surprising himself, wanting to talk to Steve, and wanting Steve to know him.

 **Bucky** : It feels better than killing did

 **Steve** : I like saying I’m dating a teacher. Leave out any other details and I’m your kinky secret, Mr. Barnes. Everyone has a school teacher fantasy. It’ll be great.

Bucky hovered his fingers over the keyboard display. He couldn't believe was actually going to admit to Steve what he’d never told any one. Not even Natasha

 **Bucky** : I was really good at it. I liked that.

Part of Bucky expected rejection, or silence. He didn’t expect a question.

 **Steve** : You liked being good at it?

Bucky swallowed, but he had never been a coward. Once he started, he was going to finish, come hell or high water.

 **Bucky** : Yes.

There, he said it. He was so good at killing because he liked being the best, being the one they called in when the situation had become hopeless. It made him proud.

 **Steve** : Oh, handsome, you’re good at a _lot_ of things. 

Bucky smiled down at the phone, even while his heart was pounding. There was a reason he had never admitted these things to people. It scared them, made him think they’d be uncomfortable with him when he kept quiet. How much worse it would get if they knew what he thought? He didn't want to find out. But Steve… Steve didn’t disappoint.

 **Bucky** : you were afraid of me at first

 **Steve** : No. Bucky, I was afraid of what you could DO to me. I wasn’t afraid of you

 **Bucky** : It hasn’t changed. What I could do to you. I’m the same person you met three days ago.

It was true. He was still paranoid, secretive, and possessive. Nothing about him had changed from his innate violence to his distrust.

 **Steve** : No you’re not. I met a stranger. You’re not a stranger any more

Could it truly be so simple? Could Steve really accept him? Some bitter, wounded part of Bucky wanted to push Steve, poke and prod at him until he responded. Until he reacted the same way as the others who had pushed Bucky away, like all his other attempted partners. He was falling so fast, so deep. 

It was terrifying. 

**Bucky** : I’ve never felt this comfortable with anyone. You’re one of a kind.

Though he hesitated again, Bucky hit send. It felt important that Steve knew how he felt, or that he didn’t think Bucky was taking him for granted. Maybe both. 

**Steve** : I haven’t let myself get this close to anyone in a long time. You’re worth it

Bucky smiled down at the phone. It eased him to know Steve didn’t begrudge Bucky his intensity. He was a man who felt strongly about things, from how good he was at his job to how intensely he desired his lover. It was why Bucky liked control so much, because otherwise he would burn too hot.

 **Steve** : Sex has always been easy. What we’re doing? That’s the scary shit

 **Bucky** : I like scary

When Steve didn’t respond, Bucky turned at last to his work. He had a lot to do before classes in the afternoon, and he was already starting late.

\----

A few hours later, Bucky stood with his conquered pile of work, intending to put it away in the filing cabinet Cloria had delivered to his office after tripping over the stacks of paperwork Bucky always ended up with. She had insisted that gun racks were not sufficient office furnishing, which just showed what she knew. As he went, his phone chimed.

The text from Steve was a simple, “Check this out,” followed by a url. 

Bucky didn’t stop moving as he touched the link with his thumb, a stack of neatly organised assessment forms in his other hand. He didn’t stop to think what could be on the other end of that link before looking down at his phone and promptly forgetting anything else but the picture displayed on it.

It was the bed from the basement, Bucky was sure of that, the camera somewhere above it. Steve was sprawled on the comforter, completely naked, staring into the camera, with his hands stretched above his head and his legs spread. The angle was perfect, showing off his caged cock, but just the tip of the plug buried in his ass. It was captioned, ‘Plugged, caged, and waiting for you, Master.’

Then Bucky ran into a wall. Pain bloomed in his face and the hall was filled with the sound of countless sheets of papers scattering all over the floor. Bucky woke from his dazed state, his cheek throbbing, dull pain shooting through his eye socket. He had managed keep his grip on the phone. 

Cursing, he pressed one hand to his throbbing cheek and looked around to make sure nobody had seen his glorious moment of idiocy. He had walked into a wall. A fucking _wall_.

Bucky checked his fingers to see if he was bleeding. He wasn’t, but considering how much it hurt he could bet on some nice, deep bruising in a few hours. The mini fridge stashed in the corner of his office had a chilled bottle of water he pressed to his cheekbone, hissing at the sting, and cast a sad eye over the scattered assessment forms. He would need to organise them. Again.

And yet, Bucky looked back at the phone, now dark, and unlocked it. He had already lost his wits, may as well lose some dignity.

 **Bucky** : ow

 **Steve** : Baby, if you want me to hurt you, we can work that out

 **Bucky** : took care of that myself

Was there a way to make the text look as grumpy and befuddled as he felt? His cheek throbbed.

 **Steve** : :( You okay?

 **Bucky** : I walked into a wall

Farewell dignity. Still, Steve did deserve that bit of truth in payment for the picture; admittedly the best picture he’d ever had sent to him.

 **Steve** : Oh, so you’re being a grump. Next time I’ll just share with my clients and not you

 **Bucky** : I walked into a wall BECAUSE of the picture

 **Steve** : I gathered

Scowling, Bucky stared at the text and wondered how _Steve_ managed to sound so damn grumpy in a text. Bucky needed to learn this skill, damn it.

 **Bucky** : I loved the picture

The kissy face emoji Steve sent in return had Bucky smiling for an hour. And if he pulled out the picture to look whenever he was alone? Well, it wasn’t like anybody had to know.


	10. Chapter 10

“Buckeroo!”

Bucky winced, then turned from the microwave in the cafeteria to glare at his boss. Okay, so it wasn’t exactly ‘professional’, but Tony was a nuisance. It was the job of every employee to keep him in his place. Also, Bucky was making him money so he wasn’t very worried. 

If Tony noticed the look, he didn’t show it, coming to a stop with his hip against the counter mere inches from Bucky. When he lowered his voice to barely a whisper, Bucky understood why.

“You see Steve’s latest picture? Jeeze, that shit is hot.” The microwave beeped, but Bucky didn’t turn to open it. He couldn’t move, every muscle tense. His stomach soured, and his hunger fled at the cold shock of those words. “I mean, I’m not into subs, but even I know how gorgeous he looked. Fuckable. I mean _really_.”

“Picture?” Bucky’s voice was remarkably even considering how cold he felt. 

The microwave beeped again. He didn’t move.

“Yeah,” Tony looked around, then lowered his voice even more, “Plugged and waiting?”

Bucky’s picture. The picture of their play. The picture that had made Bucky nearly brain himself. The picture he’d thought was for _him_.

“Uh,” Tony waved his hand in front of Bucky’s face, “You okay, there, Buckeroo?”

“Yeah...” 

Bucky opened the microwave and pulled out his pasta, trying not to grimace at the scent that was suddenly completely unappealing.

“I know about the picture.” The words tasted bitter in his mouth. He’d said it was his.

Bobbing his head, Tony nodded happily, looking almost dreamy.

“It is such a shame you snatched him off the market.”

“Did I?” Bucky murmured quietly. 

Apparently, Steve liked Bucky just as much as he liked using their play for his marketing. Bucky shook his head. He was in way too deep already if he thought about their play as theirs alone. Clearly, it wasn’t.

Tony blinked.

“Huh?”

“Nothing,” Bucky said louder, heading for a table. Tony, blessedly, shrugged, then grabbed a drink from the fridge and headed off to do who-knew-what.

\----

Bucky considered staying late at work, the way he’d done before Steve. Cloria always had a metric ton of work she could drop on his head whenever he showed any sign of weakness, and he was apparently bleeding in the water, because she’d come by his office twice in the last hour. She was clearly circling him like a hungry shark. It was either give in, or go back to Steve’s place and face him.

And Bucky had thought combat was stressful!

Eventually, Bucky decided to go, if only because that was the harder choice. He’d always believed that the more unpleasant option was what he had to get out of the way first. That left the good stuff to be the last thing he remembered before sleeping. And there would be sex, he knew that for certain. Mind-blowing, outstanding sex that shook him to the core with its intensity.

Yet he couldn't stop thinking about the picture. He’d been so surprised, so ridiculously happy after seeing it; like a teenager, willing to share his deepest secrets because his crush had smiled at him. To know that it wasn’t the special gift he’d thought it was had hurt more than he’d expected. It wasn’t even that the picture was commercial; Bucky wasn’t worried about Steve’s career choice. It was that he wasn’t ready to accept that what they did together was part of the product Steve sold. 

When he finally stood before Steve’s door, it was all he could do to make himself knock. It sounded silly in his head, but he didn’t want to be in this alone. He was gone on Steve, yes, but knowing Steve’s emotions weren’t as strong as his was like a constant vice around his heart.

The door swung open moments after his knock, as if Steve had been waiting for him. On the one hand, Bucky loved that, on the other he couldn’t shake his mood so easily. Not even the sight before him couldn’t, and it was one to rock the straightest of men. Steve looked good enough to eat. He was wearing a tight, black kimono with a burning red phoenix stitched into the silk. The pattern began small and tight at his chest, the head of the bird looking back at Bucky from around a powerful pec, and expanded lower into an intricate pattern of feathers in yellows, reds, and oranges. Its beauty was stunning, as well as how it accented the perfect proportions of Steve’s body. It had to be custom; men as big as Steve didn't fit so well into this kinds of clothing. His feet were bare, the toes peeking out from under the heavily embroidered hem. The wide sleeves flowed like water with every move. Bucky could have spent ages just taking in the exquisite sight.

Steve had other plans.

“Hey, handsome,” Steve purred, grabbing Bucky’s arm and pulling him inside.

He went with the movement, opening his arms as Steve moved closer. He watched Steve carefully, willing himself to see things as they were, not how he had imagined. It ached, this distance he was forcing between them, but he couldn’t imagine going headfirst into this again like a kid. Even as they kissed, Steve’s lips so sweet and pliant, it hurt, but it wasn’t Steve’s fault he’d been an idiot.

To his surprise, however, Steve pulled back. He was frowning, eyebrows drawn together so his forehead wrinkled. Even that was beautiful.

“What’s the matter?” Steve’s hands rubbed up and down over Bucky’s arms as if trying to warm him up. “Something happen at work?”

“Barely escaped death by paperwork,” Bucky joked, but it fell flat.

“Alright.” Steve’s eyebrows somehow frowned harder. “Well, how about you come sit. I’ll make dinner, and you tell me what’s eating you.”

Bucky shook his head, feeling a curious mix of being turned on and turned off at the same time.

“It was just a reality check I didn’t like,” Bucky murmured. 

“Come on.” Steve laced their fingers together and tugged. Reluctantly, Bucky went, following into the living room. It should have been thrilling to be pushed onto the couch and have Steve to straddle him waist, sitting on his lap so Bucky could hold his tiny waist. “I thought my picture would have put you in the mood…”

“It did,” Bucky blurted. “Up until Tony came up to talk about how hot your new picture was.”

… fuck. He hadn’t meant to say it, but having Steve in his lap made it difficult to think. Apparently, it also made it impossible to control himself. And it was a mistake, he could see it in the way Steve leaned back, surprise lighting his eyes.

Steve said slowly, like he was tasting the words, “And this was… a reality check? A… not-so-nice one?”

“I thought it was part of our game. I’d thought it was for me.” Steve leaned further backward. “Private.” Bucky put a lot of effort into not sounding angry or hurt. He tried to sound like nothing at all.

“I see,” Steve said, his words coming no faster. “Well,” he swung his leg off Bucky’s lap, sliding onto the couch next to him, “I thought it was private. I thought… it was just ours.”

“And then you posted it online,” Bucky growled, some of the anger leaking into his voice before he swallowed it down and continued in a measured tone, “For profit.”

Steve drew himself up, looking incredibly regal despite his lack of clothing.

“I post a picture every day, Bucky. You were my inspiration for today’s; something no one could know. Because it’s private. Because it’s ours.”

“It’s not ours. It’s everybody’s.” Bucky got up, pacing away. “Ours would imply I knew what was going on.” He turned and ran his hand through his hair. “Considering how we parted, I assumed the picture was for me.”

“It _was_ for you,” Steve shook his head, “I don’t know how to explain that to you.”

“How would you feel if somebody broke into your house, or stole shit while you were out, and then learned I just used you as a convenient target for my trainees?”

“Excuse me?” Steve demanded, slipping to his feet as anger finally colored his cheeks. 

“I mean your work, my work; as long as it’s an inspiration it’s okay?” Bucky paced a tight circle under the wall farthest away.

“My _work_ , is sex, Bucky. If you thought _sex_ was going to be something I stopped sharing with my clients, with my _work_ , you should never have agreed to this. You should never have made those videos with me for _my work_.”

“Did I ever tell you to stop doing what you were doing?” Bucky said angrily, stopping his movement. “There is a difference from me going into your scene with my eyes open and you sending me pictures that imply intimacy. I’m not here to buy your product, Steve!”

Steve jerked, like the words had hit him, before throwing his shoulders back, and shouting, “Then what the hell are you here for!?”

Bucky made an aborted move towards Steve and yelled back, “You! Not the goddamn site!”

“ _I am the site_!” Steve roared back. “You think any of them want to pay _my_ fees because I’m hot? Hot people are free! They can be found on any fucking site. _My_ clients come to me, _for me_.”

Bucky felt inexplicable pity wash away all his anger, leaving him strangely cold.

“If that were true, you would have never wanted a lover. _Clients_ would be enough.”

Lips curling, Bucky didn’t expect Steve’s beautiful face to look so ugly as he sneered.

“Clients _were_ enough. Until you, who’s apparently a liar. My job wasn’t supposed to be a problem, Bucky.”

“As I said, a reality check.”

“Well, welcome to reality,” Steve snapped, then turned and headed down the hall. For a second, Bucky thought he was storming off, that it was over, until Steve shouted, “I’m not having the fucking conversation wearing this.” 

Bucky almost didn’t follow, almost didn’t take that not-quite-invitation that the conversation wasn’t over. Most of his anger was gone now, faded into pity and a growing ache for something he’d thought never existed. Part of him wanted to leave, to say, ‘fuck it,’ and quit altogether. Bucky wasn’t a quitter, and he knew if he wanted to keep Steve, or have anything real in the future, he had to stick this out. Part of him knew it was just their first fight, that it was the worst for that fact, but that didn’t stop the growing desire to just build a wall and protect his heart.

In Steve’s bedroom, he didn’t expect to see Steve so frantic. He was tugging too hard at the ties holding his kimono closed, threatening to tear the seams. Bucky almost went to him, he did reach for him, but Steve beat him to any reaction when he demanded, “What do you want me to do?”

Freezing, hand outstretched, Bucky actually thought of what he would have wanted from Steve this morning when he’d thought they were on the same page, that they were building something intimate. He knew now that they expected different things, looking differently at what that picture had meant. He wasn’t sure he could reconcile everything Steve did being made public with their private life, that it was just a part of Steve’s site. Bucky needed more, he needed something private and personal. Something that was just theirs.

Without giving Bucky a beat to respond, Steve turned away, finally plucking the knot open and rolling his shoulders so the silk fluttered to the floor. In the same moment, he laughed, a desperate sound, and shook his head hard.

“If I quit, I don’t know what I’ll do. I’m terrible at everything. This is the only thing that’s ever worked.” Steve half-stumbled, grimacing as he pulled the plug out of himself roughly. He tossed it aside, never pausing to stop talking, one word tumbling over the next. “I tried retail, but I have a terrible temper. Food service, cashier, I just get so _angry_ , and I always lose it. I have no skills, not marketable ones; I can barely type sixty words a minute. I won’t let you take care of me, I won’t.” 

Bucky heard the words, but it took an embarrassingly long moment to understand just what he was hearing. Quit the site? Different job? Living on Bucky’s dime? Where the hell had that come from? Bucky never once said he wanted Steve to quit, hell, he even took part in some of the stuff Steve did for work. Bucky understood it was work. The only thing he disagreed with that Steve was nothing more than the site.

Steve hadn’t stopped, though, barely even to draw breath. The words were coming faster, his voice rising in pitch, and Bucky finally realized he was having some kind of anxiety attack.

“I can take care of myself. I _will always_ take care of myself. This has just been - it’s been the only thing I’m good at.” Walking to the dresser, he fumbled for the key to the cock cage and then struggled to get it into the tiny lock. “I make real money, enough to help my friends, and I enjoy it. So what do I do? I’ve got savings, but that won’t last forever. I was supposed to get another ten years out of this. Ask my brother for a job? Oh, that’ll go well.” The cage clicked open and Steve chucked it at the wall while adopting a mocking tone. “Hey, Clint, remember that time I got arrested attacking a customer who threw a receipt at a cashier? Yeah, well, I’m totally better now. Ha!”

“Stop,” Bucky said sharply, the one word blessedly cutting through Steve’s tirade. Blue eyes finally looked to him, panicked more than Bucky expected. “What are you even talking about?” 

“What am I talking about?” Steve hiccupped a laugh. “Jesus Christ, Bucky. What else am I supposed to do? You got into this,” he gestured between them wildly, “ _You_ did. You did those damned videos and it’s been _three_ days and I can’t separate the two, not like that. So what else am I supposed to do? Quit, Bucky. It’s all I got, but what else am I supposed to do?”

Bucky crept closer, as not to spook Steve, or trigger a violent response. Steve was so highly strung, Bucky couldn’t tell how he would react. When Steve didn’t flinch away, Bucky put his open palm on Steve’s arm, sliding it down slowly.

“I never asked you to quit,” Bucky said gently.

“No,” Steve hiccupped the word, but swayed towards Bucky’s touch, “but what else am I supposed to do? If I don’t...” Bucky watched the distress on Steve’s face and it slowly dawned on him just how much Steve must have cared about what Bucky had said to even think about closing down the site. “You’ll leave.”

Bucky pulled Steve in, more insistently than before, wanting to hold him. It wrenched at him, just how badly Steve had taken this..

“I won’t leave okay?” he said, keeping his tone intimate. He felt Steve melt into his arms. “I won’t. You don't have to close the site. I never wanted to change you like that. I have no problem with your work.”

Though he had pressed his face into Bucky’s shoulder, Steve didn’t lift his head to ask, “Then what do you want? How do I… I wanted it to be yours. And I hurt you.”

“I want things to be… separate. Not everything you do, you are, is work. That’s an unhealthy approach to work, no matter the trade.” 

Bucky touched Steve’s short hair, dragging his fingertips through as he inhaled the scent of Steve’s shampoo. Huffing, Steve wrapped his arms tightly about Bucky’s waist. 

“I know, I was angry when I said it. I didn’t mean it, but.” Bucky frowned, not liking the sound of that. Steve just looked up at him with so much sincerity it was impossible not to believe him when he said, “You _have_ so much of mine that’s not theirs. Don’t you know that?”

Bucky rubbed his hand down Steve’s back, thinking of how to express what he was feeling.

“I thought that this morning. When you sent me that picture, I thought it was for me. I think it was the lack of warning that hurt more than the actual fact of it being posted.”

“But you don’t think it now,” Steve said sadly, then licked his lips and tightened his embrace. “Bucky, you have _so much_ of me. That you’re standing in this room at all, because I have never let anyone else in here. _Anyone_. I’ve never let anyone work with me for the site and I haven’t worked with anyone but Sam in years. I have never had a moment, while cleaning dishes, where I thought I’m having this amazing, incredible sex with my man, and I can show a piece of that to the whole world, and they _won’t know_. No one knows, because it’s ours, and isn’t that amazing?” 

Bucky kept stroking Steve’s back, unwilling to break the contact. It helped to calm Steve, he thought. He much preferred this conversation to shouting.

“I never felt like this with anybody else. Nobody fits like you do. I didn’t think anyone could, but you do and it’s incredible.”

“But?” Steve murmured.

Bucky sighed, because he couldn’t see what had happened the way Steve did. He still wanted that picture to have been just his.

“Maybe we shouldn’t mix your work with our relationship any more.”

Frowning, Steve pulled back, but abruptly halted the motion.

“You don’t really want that.” Though he opened his mouth, Bucky didn’t know what to say. Steve, at least, settled back into his embrace at Bucky’s lack of denial. “You want separate,” Steve sounded like he was thinking aloud, “and you want to be involved.”

“I want it to be negotiated,” Bucky said finally. “The way we did with your videos. It was very clear what was going to happen and why. I wasn’t surprised.”

“We didn’t negotiate you watching me this morning,” Steve pointed out, but he didn’t sound like he was arguing.

“But we didn't do anything online, or for your work. I didn’t interfere when you were working because I knew it was your work. I was content to wait for you.”

“Okay,” Steve said slowly, then again more firmly, “Okay. I can do that. Separate and clearly defined, so if I want another photo like today’s, I ask you first. That’s…” Steve frowned hard and Bucky was abruptly worried again. “I am sorry, that I hurt you.”

“You also almost got Tony killed, but I abstained,” Bucky joked lamely as he pulled Steve closer.

“So kind,” Steve said dryly. “But does that work for you?”

“You don’t have to ask my permission.” Bucky trailed his hands along Steve’s hips. “Just a warning.” He rested his forehead against Steve’s. “I don't want to be surprised by outsiders again.”

Steve hummed.

“You won’t be, I promise. The rest we’ll figure out.” 

“I’m trying, too,” Bucky said softly, needing Steve to know. “To respect your work. To treat it as I would treat my own. If I don’t, don’t let me get away with it.”

“Okay.” Steve shifted so his head was on Bucky’s shoulder again. “Hey, Buck?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m naked.”

Bucky grinned slowly, kissing Steve’s temple.

“I noticed.”

“I’ve been waiting for you _all_ day.”

Bucky had made a conscious effort until now not to let his hands wander anywhere remotely sexual. Now that he had permission, he allowed his hands to cover the smooth skin of Steve’s ass. It was the prettiest, prettiest thing he’d ever seen in his life. He grabbed two handfuls and held on happily.

“Have you?” 

“Yeah,” Steve said, his voice going a little breathless, “So… if you’re done being mad at me...?”

Bucky squeezed the flesh in his hands, letting his fingertips edge slowly between the tight globes.

“What do you want, kitten?”

Steve groaned, lifted his leg, and wrapped it around Bucky’s hip.

“Fuck me, you complete jerk. Waiting. _All. Day_.” 

“I can follow orders like nobody’s business,” Bucky promised, using his grip to hitch Steve up. “Let me show you.”


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter Warnings: intimate conversations, showering, lots and lots of touching, non-sexual touching, overwhelming emotions, THE PLOT BEGINS

\----

Blissfully floating on a post orgasmic high, Steve’s eyes were half-closed. He wasn’t looking at anything in particular, just enjoying the way his skin felt, buzzing with the after-effects of how hard Bucky had made him come. It helped that he was pressed to Bucky’s side, Bucky’s heartbeat audible from where he was pressed to his chest, their bare legs tangled, and Bucky was idly caressing his shoulder. He hated the shirt, if he was being honest. The cotton was soft, but separated him from Bucky’s skin. His fingers were pushed under the hem, trailing Bucky’s belly. It would twitch every once in a while, or shiver, and Steve couldn’t help but smile every time. Soon, he hoped, he’d get all of Bucky as his own.

“You were going to quit to stay with me.”

“Mm,” Steve hummed, not wanting to break the sensation and fully enter his body yet. Talking would do that, was only quicker than moving. 

“It never even crossed my mind that you could, quit I mean.”

Letting out a long breath, Steve wiggled closer to Bucky and closed his eyes. That might let him hold on to how good he felt a little longer.

“Of course I _can_.” He wiggled again, making Bucky chuckle, and shoved his hand further under Bucky’s shirt. “I mean, contractually I’d have to finish the month, but I can.”

“I thought you were terrified of relationships.”

Steve couldn’t tell if Bucky was teasing, or being serious, and he wrinkled his nose.

“This is why. I… have a history of…” Steve sighed, not wanting to admit this, “Of moving too fast and getting in too deep. Scaring partners off. Falling for the wrong guy. All of it.” Though his toes still tingled, his body had returned to its usual state, and Steve sat up to meet Bucky’s gaze. The sensations had lasted longer than usual, and he was pretty sure it was because Bucky had cuddled him so well. “So, yeah, I’d quit to stay with you, and my brother would be pissed as shit, tell me I was being a complete idiot, and he’d probably be right, but… I… like you. A lot, and I don’t want to… lose this.”

Bucky dragged his hand along Steve’s back and Steve could feel the way his bicep flexed.

“I knew what your work was when we met, I don’t have a problem with it being your job, so you don’t have to worry about it. I don’t want you to worry about it.”

“Well, I didn’t,” Steve rubbed his nose along Bucky’s temple. He liked the scent of Bucky’s skin, even his sweat. “And then you got upset with my picture. We’ve worked that out,” he added quickly, “but… at the time, I thought you were only just realizing what my job _meant_. How… intertwined sex is with my work.”

Bucky made a sound, deep in his chest, that Steve could feel more than hear.

“Oh, I knew. I just didn’t account for myself in that scenario. I guess…” Bucky reached up, brushing Steve’s cheek. “I thought of it as something just yours.”

Steve leaned into Bucky’s hand.

“Well, now you know, and I’ll do better, so we’ll be okay.” He bit his lip. “Assuming the whole, attached-too-quick thing isn’t scaring you off.”

“You are positively a snail compared to me.” Bucky laughed, eyes crinkling at the corners, and so beautiful. Steve was pretty damn sure he had no idea how gorgeous he was. “I think I was gone on you after that first night. I told you things I don’t tell people. Ever. I’ve let you in farther than people who have literally saved my life.”

Melting, Steve let himself slip back down to pillow his head on Bucky’s chest. He felt warm all over again, a smile stretching his face so large it ached.

“Yeah?”

Rolling them over, Bucky hovered over him, hands on either side of Steve’s head. They were inches apart, bodies pressed together, noses brushing.

“Yeah,” Bucky breathed against his lips, and then he was kissing him, and Steve couldn’t remember being more in love. They hadn’t said it, not literally, but he was, and he was pretty damn sure Bucky was too. The way he was being kissed - soft and slow and tender - sure as hell _felt_ like love. 

Bucky pulled away and Steve whined, which just made Bucky laugh again. Steve kind of loved it when Bucky laughed. Then his expression changed, becoming shy. More than curious, Steve waited, watching Bucky intently.

Bucky sounded slightly hesitant, very unlike himself, when he asked, “I want to touch you.” 

Steve smiled, dragging his hands down Bucky’s back.

“I think you have all the access you need right now.”

Bucky was silent for a moment, and Steve had the odd suspicion that this was more than just _touching_. This was something important, maybe something Bucky had been told was weird.

“I thought,” another pause, a hard swallow, “a shower.”

Steve stilled, fingers curling into the dark cotton of Bucky’s shirt.

“And this?” Bucky tensed, not much, but they were pressed so tight he could feel it with his whole body. “Breathe, baby. I’m not making demands.”

“I like touching you,” Bucky lowered his head, his hair falling down to obscure his face, the ends trailing over Steve’s skin. They tickled, and he had to work hard not to sigh in contentment because he was pretty sure it wouldn’t sound like it to Bucky. “I want to take care of you,” Bucky rested his forehead against Steve’s shoulder, “but I know you want more than that, and…” 

Bucky trailed off. Steve didn't like the sense of sadness that rose off Bucky.

“Shh, hey, shh,” Steve hushed, curling his hands into Bucky’s hair and combing his fingers through the long strands. “Wanting and needing are two damn different things. One day… yeah, I want to have all of you pressed against me. I want to feel you, have you close with nothing between us, but that’s not what I was asking. I was asking if you were going to shower in a shirt, because that sounds damn uncomfortable to me. All you gotta tell me is yes, and that’s what we’ll do. You can take care of me, okay?”

“Yes,” Bucky murmured, resting more of his weight against Steve. “The cotton is soft enough it isn’t going to be a problem.” Bucky rested all of his weight on top of Steve, making it harder to draw breath, surrounding Steve with everything Bucky was. “I kind of like it, the drag of wet cotton. It’s constant enough I can feel it.”

“Okay.” Steve kissed the top of Bucky’s head. “You wanna tell me why you were so nervous about asking me to shower with you?”

“I knew you wouldn't like me refusing to strip.”

“Oh, Bucky.” Steve closed his eyes and squeezed Bucky close. “I’m not… I don’t…” Squeezing again, making Bucky grunt, he started over. “I promise, if it’s a problem we’ll have a conversation about it, okay? If I haven’t had that conversation with you, I won’t be upset.”

“Haven’t you noticed that I don’t like refusing you stuff?” 

Bucky kept his whole weight on top of Steve. Breathing was becoming a problem, but he kind of loved it as much as Bucky laughing.

“Are you trying to smother me?” 

“Maybe you’ll be more pliant with less oxygen in you,” Bucky answered seriously, getting even more comfortable on top of Steve.

Steve would have laughed if he’d had more air.

“How can I be more pliant than agreeing to your request?” Bucky didn’t move, so Steve made himself say the truth about himself aloud so Bucky would hopefully understand, “Handsome, I had a fucked-up childhood. The only time anyone touched me… They didn’t; not often. I need it, from the people I love, and that counts more for the people I’m with. I can’t… _feel_ you, is all. I feel your damn shirt.”

Bucky said nothing, but the arm that sneaked under Steve’s back felt purposeful. Steve still yelped when Bucky rolled off him without warning. Off him _and_ off the bed, yanking Steve with like he wasn’t 200 pounds of muscle. A huff of surprise was all he could manage as Bucky heaved again, lifting him into an effortless bridal carry.

“The heck!?”

“I’m taking you to the bathroom,”

Desperately, Steve clung to Bucky’s neck. He was a big man and heavy, few could carry him a few feet and Bucky had designs on a half a hallway. Bucky grunted, but he barely broke a sweat as they left the room, and entered the bathroom. He was still naked, so he hissed as Bucky seated him on the sink counter, the chill seeping into his skin. That didn’t mean he moved as Bucky started the shower, though. Cold his ass might be, Bucky was of a singular purpose, quiet, turning on the water and waiting for it to warm up.

When it had, Bucky returned and took his hands, helping him down like a damsel in a historical picture. It was amusing, honestly, but Steve was also starting to feel special in a way he wasn’t used to. Like he was treasured, and he didn’t want to spoil that for either of them by laughing.

Steve did think he was going to laugh when he saw Bucky enter the built in shower stall dressed in his long-sleeved t-shirt. The black cotton darkened and clung to Bucky’s muscles, sexy, but so very strange. Nevertheless, he swayed towards Bucky, and it took a hand under his elbow to steady him again. Steve couldn't be happier about his custom build shower, especially when it allowed him company with ease.

“Lean against the wall,” Bucky murmured, pushing Steve gently back until he was resting against the tile. “Just enjoy this.” 

Nodding, Steve stayed put as Bucky reached for the washcloth and lathered it up. Bucky’s hair was starting to stick to his face as it grew wet, and Steve itched to brush it away. The air was still heavy, though. Not tense, but laden. 

“This is important to you.” It was obvious, but Steve needed to know, “Why?”

Reaching for Steve’s hand, Bucky smiled. Steve didn't know what to expect, but it wasn’t Bucky slowly washing his fingers, one by one. He ran the cloth between each digit, over the inside of Steve’s palm, and then over the back. 

“I want you to be happy.”

The melting, swooping feeling returned, and Steve didn’t hesitate this time. He stepped close to Bucky, wrapping his arm around his waist. He did try not to get in Bucky’s way, or pull his hand free, but he _needed_ to be close. Because he’d been wrong. This wasn’t for Bucky. It was for _him_.

Bucky wasn’t fazed, just let the hand holding the washcloth slide from Steve’s arm to his back, lathering as he went, in long, soothing strokes. Steve’s eyelids lowered, a sense of peace settling over him.

“I love this,” Steve murmured, pressing his forehead against Bucky’s shoulder. The wet shirt was a little rough under his cheek, but hot from Bucky’s body and the water. He rubbed his cheek over it, just to increase the sensation.

“I’m glad. I _want_ to take care of you. You are unique.” 

Gently, Bucky pushed him back to lean against the wall again. Steve went with a moue of regret, but this too had it’s advantages as Bucky started on his chest. It was a slow and careful process. First, Bucky pressed the washcloth to Steve’s neck, rubbing over Steve’s Adam’s apple, pressing only hard enough for Steve to register the pressure before it was sliding down to his sternum. On the way, he paid a lot of attention to Steve’s pecs, washing every contour diligently before lingering on his nipples. Over and over, he swiped the soapy washcloth over his nipples, until the nubs hardened under the attention. Steve hummed in appreciation, even though Bucky’s intent wasn’t sexual. 

Pressing his palms again’s the wet tile behind his back, Steve sighed and bit his lip as Bucky sank to his knees. He was completely unselfconscious and singularly focused on his task, tenderly washing Steve’s abs, then every inch of Steve’s torso, his fingers rubbing gentle patterns into his skin with each pass.

The washcloth was still in Bucky’s hand as Bucky’s thumbs dipped into the sculpted ‘V’ of Steve’s hips, though almost forgotten. Bucky’s thumbs cleaned him, lingering appreciatively. Then he took Steve’s soft cock into his hand, holding it gently as he lifted the washcloth and carefully rubbed him down from root to tip. 

“Bucky,” Steve whispered, his knees trembling. Nothing had ever felt this intimate, and it was somehow lacking any sexual intent. Bucky was close to worshipping him, caring for him so sweetly, so completely. _Showing_ him he was loved in the way Steve had said he understood best. 

“Shh,” Bucky kissed Steve’s thigh, “Just enjoy it.”

Swallowing hard, Steve nodded and Bucky moved on to his balls, holding them just as gently. Steve couldn't help give a little moan when Bucky manipulated them for easier access, tugging and cleaning every inch. When Bucky slid the washcloth deeper between his legs, Steve spread them, leaning heavily against the wall, held up by god-only-knew how. Bucky just smiled, slipped his hands further between Steve’s thighs, and rubbed the cloth over his hole. It was still a little sensitive and a tad puffy from the round of sex they’d just had. He shivered against the sparks of sensations, the smoothness of the cloth feeling so good against his hole. He was too spent to get hard now, but he would if Bucky wanted. Part of him was glad he couldn’t; he didn’t want this to be about sex. 

Steam swirled about Bucky as he kissed Steve’s thigh once more, added more soap to the washcloth, and reached between Steve’s thighs again. That was where he focused, his hands and the cloth rubbing over Steve’s legs, cleaning more thoroughly than Steve imagined he’d ever been. It was overwhelming, being the center of such tightly focused attention, and his legs trembled again just before Bucky stood, gathering him into his arms. Steve made a sound crossed between a whimper and a moan, his legs giving out so Bucky was all that was holding him up.

“You okay?” Bucky whispered into his hair, the words nearly drowned out by the patter of water about them.

Steve nodded, not sure to explain what he was feeling, only that, “It’s so much.”

“I still want to do your feet,” Bucky murmured, his hand tracing gentle circles on Steve’s back.

“You are going to kill me.” Steve wasn’t sure if he was joking, or deadly serious. It already felt like his chest was going to burst with all the emotions Bucky’s attention inspired. “I have to sit.”

“Of course.”

Bucky was so matter-of-fact, as if what Steve asked for, anything he asked for, was completely obvious. Steve loved that acceptance and the easy way Bucky rolled with things, helping him sit, holding his hands until he was sure Steve was all right, wedged into the corner. Only then did he kneel in front of Steve again, a fluid motion, graceful and confident. Bucky wasn’t quite this smooth normally, moving like a predator.

“I like your legs.” Bucky wrapped the washcloth around Steve’s left foot. “And your feet, too. I find the bones,” he touched the jut of his ankle, “adorable.” With a firm touch that wasn’t ticklish, he scrubbed over and around Steve’s arch. “I also love how you let me touch you.” 

Steve made helpless little sounds at every brush, every touch, of Bucky’s hands. His head was bent, a tiny frown of concentration on his lips as he worked the washcloth between each toe. Steve’s feet had never felt so sensitive, no touch evoking such an intense reaction. It was pleasure, but it wasn’t the hot, simple pleasure of sex. This was deeper, made him chest tight and his heart beat double-time, made his belly shiver.

As Bucky switched to his other foot, Steve put his knuckles in his mouth and bit down, needing to feel something he could understand. He needed… Steve had no idea what he needed. What he did know, was he didn’t want this to stop. Bucky held Steve’s ankle in a careful grip as he his other hand washed it as thoroughly as the other. Steve was hyper-aware of his touch, panting against his own knuckles stuffed into his mouth. Bucky must have noticed his reaction, but said nothing, just continued to wash Steve like it was a holy ritual.

Eventually, Bucky set Steve’s leg down, and reached towards him, pushing Steve’s hair back from his face and purposefully catching his eye.

“There’s still your back left,” he said, as if cleaning Steve’s back was a deathly serious matter.

“I can’t stand,” Steve admitted, breathing too fast.

Bucky smiled at him, eyes calm and dark.

“Just lie down on your side.” 

Pulling gently at Steve, Bucky helped him lie down. The water beating against his skin felt like a thousand tiny fingers, skin so sensitized Steve wasn’t sure he could stand it for long. Bucky was still on his knees, arching over Steve, reaching for his back to wash between his shoulders with small, steady, circular movements. It had to be uncomfortable, Steve thought muzzily, watching how Bucky was leaning forward. He could see Bucky's thighs tensed in the uncomfortable position, though Bucky didn't seem aware of the discomfort. He was focused on reaching every inch of Steve’s skin. First, the nape of Steve’s neck, his touch massaging, leaving him melted against the floor. Then he rubbed Steve’s shoulders, strong sweeps of pressure that left goosebumps the hot water soothed away. By the time Bucky reached the small of his back, he was floating, hungry for more and exhausted. 

At some point, Steve had wrapped his hand around Bucky’s knee, the only part of him he could easily reach. He didn’t remember doing it, but it was nice, feeling his skin beneath his palm as Bucky’s touch slid to his ass.

“Bucky,” he called out, voice shuddery. He didn't even know what he wanted. For Bucky to stop? To start over? 

“It’s okay, Kitten. I’m done.” 

Bucky dropped the washcloth and reached for Steve again, pulling him up, into his lap. At least, as much of Steve as would fit. Steve curled into Bucky’s chest, barely noticing the wet shirt as he tried to breathe through his emotions. It wasn’t like this was his first rodeo, it had just been a long time - years - since he’d tried a relationship. The effects of touch meant he usually fell hard for a guy who took him to bed. How could he help it? Being with a guy, so close, touched inside, brought to heights of pleasure? He couldn’t, and yet nothing compared to this. No one had ever… 

With a hiccup, Steve burrowed his face into Bucky’s throat, his breath hitching as he started crying. It was humiliating, made no sense, but here he was crying as Bucky held him so tight. 

“Was it too much?” One of his hands resting against Steve’s nape squeezed a little, giving Steve something to ground him. “Do you want me to stop touching you?”

Steve quickly shook his head, hard enough he bumped against the shower wall. Letting out a shaky laugh, he sniffed and wiped at his eyes, before meeting Bucky’s.

“I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me. That was… It was… Wonderful. _Thank you_.”

“I enjoyed this.” Bucky was still holding Steve hard against his chest, his arms a tight cage. “I liked caring for you, touching you like this. I liked you _letting_ me.” He kissed the top of Steve’s chest. “I think it’s time to get you out of here, before you turn even more pruny than you are now.”

“I don’t think I’m in any condition to do anything.”

“I’m kind of looking forward to drying you.” 

Bucky hummed quietly, the vibrations travelling through his chest straight to Steve’s cheek, still pressed against Bucky’s chest.

“Oh god,” Steve said shakily, and Bucky laughed.

“Is that a yes, or a no?”

“It’s… Yes. You’re just… perfect.” Steve gave up trying to understand everything he was feeling, relaxing in Bucky’s embrace. “You’re perfect.”

“I’m not,” Bucky contradicted softly, “but I’m glad you think that. Thank you.” Huffing, Steve rolled his eyes, but didn’t argue. “Will you give me a moment to get out and change my shirt?”

“Um,” Steve hesitated, “Please, no. Not… yet. Not sure I’ll handle your going well.”

“Okay,” Bucky agreed easily, not even a hitch of hesitation. Like before, when Steve’s legs gave out on him, he just accepted and rolled with it.

Raising slightly onto his knees, Steve still on his lap, Bucky reached for the water and switched it off. Then he murmured, “Hold on.” The spray cut off and Steve wrapped his arms around Bucky, but it was a pitiful effort at best. In turn, Bucky wrapped one arm behind Steve’s back and wormed the other under his knees. Then he grunted, shifted, and heaved them both up. 

“How much do you _lift_?” Steve demanded, shocked by the display all over again.

Bucky laughed, hitching Steve higher with a slight toss. Steve yelped and clung tighter to him.

“Don’t do that!”

“You were slipping,” Bucky said as he set Steve back on the counter in a mirror image of what they’d done when they’d entered the bathroom the first time. Again, it felt chilly under his ass.

“I wasn’t,” Steve protested, but his heart wasn't in it. He kept his hands on Bucky as he shifted away to reach for the cupboard that housed Steve’s towels. He pulled out a few of them and dumped them unceremoniously into the sink. 

“Lean forward,” Bucky murmured and Steve obeyed, swaying almost helplessly as Bucky chose one of the bigger towels and draped it over Steve’s head and back. With its protection in place, Bucky pushed him back to lean against the mirror. The towel was soft and warm, keeping away the chill of the glass, even if it lost him contact with Bucky. Before he had the time to protest, though, Bucky grabbed another towel and pressed it to Steve’s chest. At first he just spread the towels around Steve, cocooning him in cotton, waiting for them to soak up the water. Steve leaned back into him, sighing, and watching as Bucky’s lips quirked in a tiny, pleased smile.

After a few moments, Bucky rubbed the cloth against Steve’s skin. He was firm without being ticklish, but gentle enough not to rub the sensitized skin raw. Following the same pattern as the washcloth, Bucky began with Steve’s neck, then slowly traveled down the planes of his chest. Overstimulated, the attention he paid to Steve’s nipples was almost unbearable, the soft towel suddenly rough. Steve squirmed and panted, hands fisting in Bucky’s shirt and probably stretching it beyond saving.

“Just making sure you’re dry,” Bucky said, but his hands left, venturing lower, to his stomach and sides.

“Spread your legs for me, kitten,” Bucky said, and Steve didn’t even try to stifle the laughter. 

“Are you going to do wicked things to me?” he managed. At this point Bucky didn't even have to ask, Steve was literal putty in his hands. He spread his knees as wide as he could in the limited space of the bathroom. Steve could feel the heat of his body between his legs and longed to close them against Bucky’s sides, just to feel his presence.

“Just making sure you’re dry,” Bucky said again. 

Bucky dried Steve’s hips and thighs, running the towel over him in long, luxurious strokes that awoke goosebumps again. Everything smelled like lavender, like his fabric softener, and it felt so wonderful, but not quite as floaty as before. Just as Steve was relaxing though, Bucky reached between his legs.

Steve half-swallowed a breath, then hiccupped to rid his stomach of the swallowed air. Bucky was thorough, one hand lifting Steve’s soft cock, stretching it gently and running the towel over the shaft, the head, then pressing it carefully to the slit. Steve trembled, legs spread, head tossed back into the mirror, as Bucky touched and touched and _touched_ him; manipulated his body like it was a precious instrument to care for. By the time Bucky deemed all of Steve’s groin dry, Steve’s toes were curling and his breath was coming fast and uneven again. He felt dizzy and boneless.

“I can’t,” Steve whispered, pressing his trembling legs against Bucky’s sides. He felt like he was going to slide right off the counter and onto the floor.

“Don’t worry, I have you.” 

Bucky pulled Steve against his chest, his wet and cold chest. Steve made a tiny sound of displeasure, but still snuggled close, making it difficult for Bucky to insinuate a towel between them.

“I just dried you, don’t get wet again,” he murmured, and Steve sighed, but let himself be pushed away so Bucky could wrap him like a burrito again.

With obvious regret, Bucky said, “I need to get out of this shirt. I’m only going to leave you for a minute so sit tight, okay? I’ll be back soon.”

Steve nodded. Bucky had to be cold by now. He’d put all his attention into Steve, not even drying his own hair or body, just dripping, taking care of Steve. He felt crushingly guilty for being so selfish.

“Hey,” Bucky said gently, calling Steve’s attention back to him. “It’s okay. Everything is fine, I just need to change.” Bucky leaned in to press a small kiss against Steve’s lips. “Okay?”

Steve whispered, “Okay.” 

“Good.” 

Bucky smiled at him, and kissed him quickly again, before snatching the last towel and leaving the bathroom. Grabbing the towel about his shoulders, Steve shivered, tucking himself into its warmth. It was a bit damp, diluting the smell of lavender. Goosebumps broke out down his thighs as he shivered again, and he laughed weakly. This reaction was _ridiculous_ … but Steve kind of loved that Bucky could do this to him. Mostly, though, he loved that Bucky cared enough to try.

When Bucky came back, he had on a different shirt and a pair sweatpants. Steve already missed the naked skin, but he did wonder where Bucky was finding all these clothes. Had he brought them in and Steve just missed it? He _had_ been singularly focused on getting Bucky to ravish him, then the fight...

“Do you want me to carry you to bed?” Bucky asked, putting his hands on Steve’s knees. They were warm, soothing as the thumbs brushed the inner joint, and chased away his chill.

“We haven’t eaten.”

“Dinner it is,” Bucky said. “Hold on, then.” 

Bucky stepped in between Steve’s legs and Steve smiled, closing his legs around him and reaching up to get a good grip on Bucky’s shoulders. He really liked it when Bucky carried him. It not only felt good, it gave him a kick to feel Bucky’s strength. Yes, he would hold on. Happily.

As they passed out of the bathroom, Steve had the forethought to snag his fluffy robe off the back of the door. Bucky snorted a laugh, one Steve guessed he’d meant to stifle entirely. Smiling, Steve just held on to Bucky, letting the white fleece drag across the floor so he could keep his arms tight around Bucky’s neck. He could put it on later, once Bucky put him down again. It was almost depressing how inevitable that was.

“Am I cooking?” Bucky asked, kicking a chair out from under the table and setting Steve in it.

“Unless you want me to fall.”

“Definitely not,” Bucky said, taking the robe from Steve as he started trying to put it on and helping him into it instead. It took a bit of effort, Steve having to get his legs under him for a shaky moment, but he was soon ensconced in its warmth. “You have a choice between… scrambled eggs and scrambled eggs.” 

Bucky opened the fridge and peered into it with a doubtful expression. Steve grinned.

“Can I have scrambled eggs?” 

“Perfect!” Bucky pulled out the eggs. “Since it’s probably the only thing that I can make with any reliability.”

“You’re adorable,” Steve said, sighing contentedly. It probably would have sounded sarcastic if he hadn’t sounded so over the moon.

“I left my protein shakes at home,” Bucky said mournfully. “I could add some powder to the eggs.”

Steve’s soft, fluffy emotions fled and he stared at Bucky in horror.

“Maybe just stick to the eggs.” Steve swallowed the imagined taste and grimaced. “Safer that way, I think.”

“Remember this next time you don’t cook for us,” Bucky said, and Steve laughed, leaning back into the chair and shoving his hands into the sleeves of his robe.

“Okay. Top Chef you are not. Though, you are the sweetest man I’ve ever met. I loved the flowers you left me.”

Bucky put the eggs on the counter and turned to Steve.

“Flowers?”

Nodding, Steve motioned towards Bucky’s elbow. The bouquet of white roses he’d found on his counter after Bucky had left that morning was tucked into a crystal vase, basking in the light streaming through the window. 

“They’re beautiful. And that shower was so incredible, and you’re making me dinner -”

“These flowers?” Bucky interrupted.

“Of course those flowers.” Steve frowned. “They were right where you left them. I put them in the vase so they’ll last longer.”

Bucky went to the vase and examined it.

“Did you find a note?” he asked, looking between the plants.

“No. Did you leave one? Maybe I dropped it.”

“I’m asking because I didn’t leave you those flowers.” Bucky looked back at Steve as he tried to understand what Bucky was saying. “They weren’t here when I left.”

“I… don’t understand,” Steve finally said. “I found them here, after you left.”

“Which is what’s worrying me.” Bucky put the flowers down. “There doesn't seem to be any surveillance equipment inside the bouquet.”

“Surveillance equipment?” Steve repeated. “Oh, you mean your work? You think it’s from your students?”

That was… creepy, but at least it was an explanation.

“Breaking in here without indicating it was them, only leaving flowers behind? Doubtful, if only because it doesn't give them credit. I told you that this month's assignment is planting a bug on me.”

“And there’s no surveillance equipment,” Steve mumbled, rubbing at his eyes. “I don’t understand. No one else is gonna send me roses.”

“I’m going to ask anyway.”

Bucky pulled out his phone from his pocket and unlocked the screen as Steve watched. His fingers flew over the screen, rapidly texting away.

“Right,” Steve rubbed at his eyes, too tired to care why Bucky was so focused on the flowers. When his stomach rumbled, he also decided he was too hungry. Bucky was still focused on his phone, however, so Steve held in a sigh and tentatively put his weight on his feet. The muscles wobbled, but held - much to Steve’s surprise - and he carefully walked to the fridge, then bumped Bucky aside. If Bucky wanted to tell him what was going on, he could, but Steve was going to eat.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter warnings: teasing, naked cooking, conversation

Steve scowled, grabbed Clint’s hand, and placed it atop his head. Though he failed to stifle a laugh, Clint combed his fingers through Steve’s hair so Steve didn’t have to hurt him. The dozen trainees Bucky had brought into his home, however, were free game. Especially the next one who mistook yet another sex toy for a decoration. 

“I don’t even know why I’m here,” Clint said for the umpteenth time.

Like every time, Steve said, “So I’m not outnumbered,” crossed his arms, and leaned heavily against his foster brother. Steve had commandeered the couch shortly after Clint’s arrival and fixed his best glare on anyone who tried to get them to move. At least Bucky had kept his trainees out of Steve’s bedroom; it was the only point he was getting out of this mess.

“Okay, let me try a new question,” Clint said, “Why were you outnumbered in the first place?”

“Flowers,” Steve tossed his head, because Clint had stopped petting him. When the touch resumed, with another amused snort, Steve added, “Bucky is freaking out because he didn’t send them.”

“Do you have another stalker?”

Steve shrugged. It wouldn’t be the first time, but nothing had ever come of it. Admittedly, it was the first time any of them had entered his home, but they were all relatively harmless. Just really obsessive fans and, well, Steve had Bucky to keep him safe. He’d never had that, and he’d been fine until now. Mostly.

“He’s overreacting.” Steve sighed. “Like, way, way overreacting.” Just thinking of all those strangers running amok in his house drove his irritation to new heights. “Look at this! He brought half a platoon with him!”

Clint frowned, clearly not believing him, but Steve was not going to be outnumbered on this. His longest and closest friend must have seen the mutinous look in Steve’s eyes, because he didn’t voice any agreement with Bucky, or objection to Steve’s opinion. He looked away, waved - with the hand not in Steve’s hair, thankfully - at the milling, ex-military all clad in black. All of them were handsome in one way or another; good clothes, no matter how drab, helped the impression.

“So which one is he?”

With his bare foot, Steve pointed his toes in Bucky’s direction. Bucky wasn’t dressed all that differently from the others in plain black clothing, but he still stood out. Starting from the form-fitting, mock turtleneck with long sleeves to the long hair that none of the other men sported. He wasn’t the tallest, or the biggest, but there was a clear aura of control about him, an authority that made the others quietly defer to. Steve couldn’t help but track him with his eyes, fascinated by the quiet way he controlled his people. Bucky had overreacted, went way overboard with this whole situation, but Steve couldn’t stop himself from watching the way the black cotton stretched over his defined chest, or admiring how the small tendrils of hair curled around his face as they escaped his low ponytail. 

“Broody-face?” Steve tilted his head back, looking up at Clint, and found his foster brother’s eyebrows high above their usual position. “Wow.”

“What?” Steve frowned, looking at his boyfriend, then at Bucky. He had the hottest one and couldn’t see why Clint looked surprised. “I don’t get it.”

“You’re usually… not attracted to tall, dark, and silent.” Clint was watching Bucky just as hard as Steve had for the last hour. What mattered, though, was he didn’t seem disappointed, just surprised. “I was expecting Goldilocks over there.”

Clint’s eyes went to a tall, golden Adonis who could have passed for Steve’s brother and, okay, maybe Steve liked ‘em pretty, but Bucky was pretty.

Huffing, Steve eyed Goldilocks and then looked back to his foster brother.

“Bucky is prettier.”

Unashamed of his feelings, Steve had said the words loudly and confidently, and they hadn’t gone unnoticed. A stocky trainee with bright green eyes inspecting Steve’s mantlepiece snorted, coughed, and Bucky finally looked up from the notes he’d been making. 

“Problem, Spencer?”

“No, sir,” Spencer said seriously. Then his blank expression cracked and he added, “I think you’re pretty, too, sir.”

“Prettiest of them all,” Steve called, then lounged back as gracefully as he knew how - which was graceful as fuck, thanks, he’d practiced - and put his head in Clint’s lap. Half of this was because he liked to be draped all over the people he cared about, and half was because Bucky always looked when he touched Clint a little more than was strictly necessary.

“Do you want me to be killed?” Clint asked, soto voce, but resumed his petting.

“I’ll protect you,” Steve whispered back. “My personal head scratcher is very important to me.”

“We haven’t had a chance to properly meet,” Bucky said, coming closer. He wasn’t looming or glaring at Clint, but his face was so carefully neutral Steve knew it was a mask. “James Barnes.” He extended his hand, and Steve saw Clint’s eyes flick to the other, unoffered and gloved.

Because he didn’t actually want Bucky to hate Clint, Steve said, “Bucky, this is Clint Barton, my brother.”

“I can see the resemblance,” Bucky said, deadpan, and staring into Clint’s eye with that same carefully neutral expression.

Clint was, thankfully, too cocky, dumb, and exhausted by life to be intimidated easily.

“I’m sure my ma would have been happy to have Steve, if she hadn’t died and all.” He took Bucky’s hand and shook, big up and down movements, and Steve pouted because that meant he wasn’t being petted any more. “Or Steve’s ma would have had me. Oh well, that’s life.”

“As I said, I can see the resemblance.” 

Now there was a bit of a smile curling up at Bucky’s lips. It changed his face from attractive to really handsome, and Steve gave a bit of a happy sigh. Bucky was so good looking and Steve was so lucky.

And irritated. He was irritated by loads of men in his home for no reason. Right.

Pouting harder, Steve swatted at Bucky’s and Clint’s hands.

“Give it back. That’s my scratching hand.”

“You are very demanding,” Bucky murmured, letting his voice slide into that low register that Steve loved to hear. “Maybe give your brother a break.”

“You invaded my home.” Steve sniffed. “I require consoling.”

“It was excruciatingly easy to invade.” That deep purr was gone in favor disgust. “Half of your windows are open, and you have no security measures whatsoever.”

“I like air,” Steve snapped, crossing his arms. “And security just means something I have to remember to turn on and off every time I open a door or it screams it’s bloody head off and gives me a migraine. And anyone can just break a window if they really want in.”

Clint gave Bucky a tried and tired look and put his hand where it belonged, in Steve’s hair.

“How have you not realized you’re dating the biggest drama queen to ever walk the planet?”

“Besides,” Steve said loudly, ignoring the look Clint and Bucky were sharing. He would not be outnumbered. “I have you two. What do I need security for?”

“I am not always here,” Bucky’s voice returned to chillier climates, and Steve was having none of it, pretty face or no pretty face.

“Life isn’t safe,” Steve retorted. “I will not be a prisoner in my own home because I got flowers.”

“Steve -”

“No,” Steve said, cutting Bucky off and sitting up. “You had your pals over, you did… whatever-”

Clint said, “There’s a difference between not wanting too much security and not having any at all.”

Throwing up his hands, Steve didn’t look to Clint at all. He was outnumbered and he hated everyone.

“So what’s your big plan, then?”

“I had my people secure the common areas as best as they could without installing a full security system-”

Dryly, Steve said, “So they closed and locked my windows.”

“They nailed shut the windows you haven’t opened in a year,” Bucky continued as if he didn’t see how angry Steve was getting.

“Nailed,” Steve repeated.

“Not all of them, Steve,” Bucky said. “Your locks are laughable, but no use changing them with how weak your door and frame is. I already called a guy, he’ll come next week to change them.”

“He better paint it red like this one,” Steve grumbled, but slumped as Clint started rubbing his back.

Bucky just kept talking.

“And I’d like to install a security system. We have some great wireless models with motion sensors and cameras. You won’t even notice.”

“No.” Steve said, hard and flat. “No. I have enough cameras on me. I don’t need something someone can hack and leak more footage of me - footage I can’t control.”

“Steve -”

“No,” Steve repeated, whirling on Clint since this objection had come from him. “No cameras. Especially not in my bedroom.”

“Your bedroom and the basement haven’t been secured yet,” Bucky said, his voice even again, “and the possibility of an extremely talented and extremely well-paid hacker able to bypass the security is still lower than someone just waltzing in whenever they feel like it.”

Steve focused on his boyfriend and narrowed his eyes.

“You mean is more likely considering more of my customers have my IP than my address, right? Because I can’t imagine you think it’s as normal for me to get hacked as Clint.”

“Hey!” Clint protested. “I do… interesting things… online.”

Steve didn’t even bother to roll his eyes, but kept focused on Bucky.

“I don’t want cameras. I don’t want motion sensors. If,” Steve said the word slowly, “I agree to security on the doors and windows, those little things that tell when it’s open or not, will you drop the others?”

Steve could tell that Bucky didn’t like his answer by the way he returned to a carefully neutral expression.

“Do I have a choice?”

Though Steve was tempted to point out he could just say no to everything, he didn’t need to dig his victory home. They both knew he’d won.

“No.”

“Before you start patting yourself on your back,” Bucky said lowly, “just remember that somebody entered this house when we were both inside. Probably looked through your kitchen, maybe some other rooms on the ground floor. He or she left a bouquet of flowers on your kitchen table and then left, without being heard, or seen, or leaving a trace of their presence.”

Steve scowled, but only flexed his arms across his chest.

“It sounds worse when you put it like that.”

“I know high levels of security are invasive, and I know some are not what you would agree to, but whatever means you do choose, remember that somebody was here already, and remember to use whatever we put in.”

“Okay.” Steve took a deep breath, made himself relax his arms, and added, “Which is why I emptied the dresser for you in the bedroom.”

Clint gasped, audibly, and half-tackled Steve off the couch.

“My boy is growing up!”

Groaning in frustration because Clint _ruined his moment_ , Steve batted at his foster brother and tried valiantly - and in the end, in vain - not to fall off the couch. “Get off me, you Neanderthal!” Steve shouted, but Clint was set on his hugging, and they rolled right onto the floor.

“Ow,” Clint whimpered, because Steve had the sense to use him to cushion his fall.

“You sure?” Bucky sounded mild, but his eyes were focused on Steve with intensity that sent shivers down Steve’s back.

“Of course I am,” Steve said, then put his hand on Clint’s face and shoved because the man wouldn’t let go. “Of course I am,” he said again, pushing himself up so he could actually see Bucky towering above them. “I already did it.”

Bucky reached down without looking at Clint and grabbed him by the back of his shirt. He then proceeded to heave him up while simultaneously extending his other hand to Steve. Grinning, Steve took it, letting himself be pulled up.

“Clear out,” Bucky barked, and the room was suddenly empty of anyone besides Steve, Bucky, and Clint who was climbing to his feet among grumbles and complaints about his back. 

“Thank you,“ Bucky said quietly, pulling Steve close enough that their chests pressed together. Steve could feel the heat of Bucky’s body seeping through the cotton.

“Don’t be dumb,” Steve said, blushing and hopelessly trying to deflect, “I just need to use whatever you put in. If you put yourself in…”

“You make terrible puns,” Clint grumbled. “Now feed me.”

“Steve,” Bucky said without taking his eyes off of Steve. “How did he survive this long?”

“Clint?” Steve smiled slowly. “We have a deal, see.”

“A long-standing, well-respected, deal,” Clint added.

“We watch each other’s backs.” Steve leaned up and kissed Bucky’s nose. “I get his hands for head petting, and he gets mine to feed him.”

“I taught him to shoot,” Clint said, with a pointed look Bucky’s way. Bucky snorted something that sounded very much like a derisive ‘leg!’. Then Clint fixed _Steve_ with a wilting look, “Especially after that one debacle.”

Steve sighs.

“It was one time.” 

“That you admit to.”

Rubbing at the base of his spine, Clint was already heading for the kitchen, and Steve smiled before looking back at Bucky. He wrapped his arms around Bucky’s waist and leaned against his hard, bulky frame.

“Clint thinks it’s pathetic I hit him in the leg, too.”

“Damn right!” Clint shouted from around the corner. “Grouping, Rogers! Grouping! Aim for the _center_ mass.”

Bucky was nodding.

“He’s right.”

Steve snorted.

“You mean, _you’re_ right.”

Bucky grinned.

“That, too.” 

\----

After inspecting Steve’s home, Bucky had had to go back to work and do _actual_ consultations and training with his guys. The break, and lunch with Steve’s brother, had been refreshing, however, and he wasn’t even a little tired as he headed home. To Steve. To _their_ home.

Bucky rolled his left shoulder, and, okay, the scars ached after all the training today, but it was worth it. Everything was worth it when he was coming home to Steve. Even if the guy was being an idiot about his security, Bucky had known that Clint was just as worried as he was, and they’d quietly worked out a strategy to check on Steve every few hours. Natasha would help, apparently, and Bucky was a little less worried.

A little.

When he came home, he toed off his shoes, keyed in the security code, and paused. The house was oddly quiet. No sound came from the kitchen, the basement, or the office. Like no one was -

The buzz of a powertool filtered through the walls. Bucky started. He followed the sound to what he objectively knew was Steve’s garage, but had only seen while busy worrying about security. He carefully pushed open the door and paused to stare. Steve, with bandsaw in hand, was standing over a workbench, cutting through several inches of plywood. He was wearing a jean jacket, gloves, bulky safety goggles, and _shoes_. Supplies were strewn all around him: a pile of leather-like fabric, more lengths of plywood, and a box of… black dildos?

Steve paused, powering down the saw, and checked his cut. He blew away sawdust, fingered the wood, and then pulled a pencil out of his back pocket. It was oddly arousing. Then again, Bucky loved it when Steve was confident.

“Okay,” Bucky said and Steve jumped, then looked up at Bucky with a smile, “you said you are terrible at everything you do, and here you are working with your hands.”

Steve snorted, pulled the goggles atop his head, and moved to kiss Bucky’s cheek.

“Oh yeah,” Steve said in his dry, ‘you’re being ridiculous’ voice, “there’s a load of work out there for a man who can make a dildo bench.”

Bucky blinked, looking at the box of sex toys again, and then rolled his eyes.

“When you put it like _that_ …”

“That’s my line,” Steve smiled again, and wrapped Bucky tighter about the waist, like he always did. “Hungry?”

Bucky leaned back, twisting to see the way the jeans were stretched over Steve’s ass. It was high and tight, and made his hands itch to touch.

“Yeah,” he purred.

Biting his lip, Steve grabbed Bucky’s hands and pulled them down to his ass. Yet, then he said, “I meant for _food_.”

“It’s nourishing.”

Leaning back, Steve raised an eyebrow.

“My _ass_ is nourishing? That’s what you’re going with?”

“It feeds my soul,” Bucky responded seriously, leaning in and dragging his day-long scruff over Steve’s neck and cheek, smelling the fresh sweat and dust on Steve.

“Mm,” Steve hummed, eyes fluttering as he came closer to giving in, “that’s a good argument, but…”

“But?” Bucky prompted, squeezing Steve’s ass for emphasis, while pressing his lips to the deliciously exposed tendon and exploring it slowly, from the place Steve’s neck and shoulder met up to the vulnerable shell of his ear. 

“But,” Steve sighed, “I have to finish this bench for a video, we have to eat, and I still haven’t done any work on those Sex 101 videos that I hired you for. You are a distraction, Bucky Barnes. A sexy, gorgeous, distraction.”

Bucky hummed, thinking it over. Sex, or food? That was a truly hard question, but it was his conscience that finally decided for him. Steve had work.

“Do I get to sit with you while you cook?” Bucky asked, drawing out this moment he got to hold and fondle Steve. He loved how Steve smelled.

“Yes,” Steve said slowly.

“And while you work on the bench?”

Laughing, Steve said, “Yes,” again.

“Okay, fine.” Bucky sighed heavily. “Food it is.”

Eyes flashing, Steve bit his lip again and Bucky had a brief fight with his conscience.

“Want me naked while I cook for you, sir?”

In a flash, Bucky’s cock throbbed.

“That’s not playing fair,” Bucky growled. 

Steve just bit his lip harder, looking up at Bucky coyly through his lashes.

“Maybe I’d like to be a bit bad tonight, sir. Maybe I’ll earn a spanking before we go to sleep?”

Bucky hooked his fingers into the belt loops of Steve’s jeans and pulled him close enough his lover couldn’t miss how hard he was.

“Oh...” Bucky couldn’t help himself and put his teeth against Steve’s neck. He didn't bite, just pressed them to the soft skin for a second, letting Steve feel them. Then he pulled back. “I will want to thoroughly spank you today. Paint your skin rosy pink, and then take my fill of your pretty, pretty ass.”

Steve shivered, his eyes fluttering, and he moaned softly. Then he looked at Bucky, smirked, and pulled away.

“After I work on the bench.”

Oh, Bucky thought, so _that_ was how it was going to be.

“Careful, kitten,” Bucky said, growling the words in warning, “you don’t want to push me.”

Steve batted his long eyelashes at him and Bucky knew exactly what all of his customers saw, what they wanted, but it was _his_ and his alone.

“No, sir. I’m a good boy.”

Bucky snorted and Steve grinned, then tossed the gloves and goggles on the bench, heedless of the sawdust that coated everything in the room. Then he took Bucky’s hand, leading him inside, but stopped just past the door to kick off his shoes.

“Oh no, sir,” Steve said abruptly, his eyes wide and vulnerable, as if surprised as he turned to Bucky, “I’m wearing too much. Will you help me?”

“I certainly will,” Bucky agreed with a charming smile. “After all, I need to see the skin I’m going to turn pink later.”

Bucky didn’t wait for a response, and Steve’s jacket was the first thing to go. He pushed it off Steve’s shoulders, letting it slide to the floor. He grabbed the hem of his shirt and pulled up. Steve raised his arms to accommodate him, and Bucky tossed it away as soon as it cleared Steve’s arms, leaving his lover messy-haired and flushed. He didn't go for Steve’s jeans immediately, though; couldn’t just leave that chest unacknowledged. 

Steve’s pecs were as stunning as always. A pink flush was already staining the pale skin while his nipples were hardening under Bucky’s gaze. He loved the size and the shape of Steve’s chest; the contrast of wonderfully perky pecs and flat stomach that narrowed down to slim hips. It was such a turn on, a rush really, how Steve’s pecs filled his hands so well. Bucky squeezed them a time or three before leaning down to place a few light bites to the tempting swell of flesh.

Finally, he tore himself away and reached for jeans that barely hung onto Steve’s slim hips. Another turn on: wrapping his hands around those lithe hips. He opened the first button and was pleased to feel that Steve was mostly hard. Cupping that swell, he rubbed and had Steve gasping before he slid a few fingers under the waistband to protect Steve from the zipper as he pulled it down. He could feel the heat of Steve’s skin on his fingers, even feel the way Steve’s cock twitched at the contact, and heard his drawn breath as the jeans slid off his hips.

“Kick them off,” Bucky said roughly, turning his hand so that it hovered close to, but didn't touch, Steve’s lovely, flushed cock. He watched, mesmerised and wanting as Seve obeyed. His cock swayed with the motion, but Bucky made sure not to touch yet. Not until Steve was naked.

“Like that, sir?” Steve had the gall to ask, and Bucky couldn't help but smile back at him.

“Exactly like that.” 

Bucky closed that last inch of space between them and ran just the back of his pointer finger over the velvet soft head of Steve’s cock. Just once. Just to see Steve’s pupils dilate before he backed up to give himself more space to think. Steve swallowed, but turned and _swished_ down the hall. Bucky didn’t have another word for it, and his gaze was stuck to his hips as they swung back and forth, back and forth, then disappeared around the doorframe.

It would have been undignified to scramble, but Bucky did hurry after him. He was in time to see Steve tying the frilly apron in place, the fabric ridiculously tented by Steve’s erection. Bucky ached to come closer and slide his hands between Steve’s legs, hold his smooth balls in his hand and smell his scent again. Bucky had the feeling, though, that that was just what Steve wanted, so he could pull away and fuss about, tease Bucky until his balls were aching, so he kept his hands to himself.

“So, honey,” Steve said, eyes twinkling wickedly, a smirk on his lips, all a contrast to the sugar-sweet tone of his voice, “how was your day?”

“Cloria, the bloodthirsty vampire, did her best to suck the life out if me.”

“Your secretary?” Steve clarified, his voice normal again.

“The bane of my existence, yes.”

Steve pouted, his full lips demanding to be kissed.

“You poor thing, did you have to do paperwork?”

Bucky nodded.

“I think she makes multiple copies just to fuck with me some days, I swear. There can't be so much stuff every week!”

“Yes there can,” Steve said mildly, bending over with his head in the fridge.

“There…” 

Bucky trailed off as those perfect, peach cheeks were exposed in an exceedingly pleasing manner. He’d already praised Steve’s ass, but god, it was the tightest, prettiest ass he’d ever seen. The cheeks were high and firm, he could see the velvety, vulnerable shape of his balls and even glimpsed his furled hole when Steve bent down like that. It couldn’t have taken _that_ long to find his ingredients, but his hips were swaying absently side-to-side as he fussed with drawers and moved things around. 

“Uh, what?” Bucky had to ask when he realized he had completely forgotten what he was trying to say.

Slowly, Steve straightened, vegetables and wrapped meat in his arms, and gave Bucky a pleased smile.

“Sounds like Cloria is a right taskmaster.”

“Uh, yeah; born and bred sadist.” Bucky cleared his throat as Steve deposited his bounty on the counter and set to work creating magic. “She doesn't even bother to hide her enjoyment when she corners me in my office like some kind of defenceless little animal, ready for slaughter.”

“You? Defenceless?” Steve snorted, an adorably unattractive sound. “Please, pull my other leg.”

“Thanks,” Bucky nodded to himself, pleased with the invitation and went to Steve, putting both his palms on those long thighs. God, those legs were awesome. He got a good grip on the muscles and held on, enjoying the firmness of flesh and smoothness of skin.

“Ah, ah,” Steve bumped Bucky backwards with his ass, wriggling his hips out of Bucky’s grip, “None of that, mister.”

“Simply responding to your invitation,” Bucky grinned, letting himself be left alone again. His uncovered palm tingled with the phantom sensation of Steve’s skin.

“Uh huh,” Steve said, without an ounce of belief. 

“So, I got to meet the family today?” Bucky asked, taking a slight step back to see all of Steve as he worked.

“Clint?” Steve asked, looking over and continuing once Bucky nodded. “Yeah. He’s the only family I have.”

“How did you meet him?”

“My first foster home, after my mom passed.” To Bucky’s surprise, Steve’s body language changed on a dime. No more swishing and teasing; his head was down, gaze fully focused on his hands slicing what Bucky guessed was chicken. “He’s a few years older than me, but the home had lots of kids of different ages.”

“I’m sorry. For your mom,” Bucky interrupted softly.

Steve looked up at him and smiled, something soft and intimate. 

“Thank you. She was… I cherish the memories I have of her.”

“You were close?”

“Very,” Steve’s eyes shifted, gazing inward, “She loved me to pieces, and I loved her.”

Bucky felt a pang in his chest at this. He thought back to his own childhood and shifted uncomfortably, backing up until he could lean against the wall and watch Steve. He liked the feeling of something hard and unmovable at his back. He loved his mother, but he was never close to her or his father.

Shaking himself, Steve focused on the meat again, and brought Bucky back with a simple, “And then she died. Lymphoma.”

“I am very sorry,” he said quietly, wishing Steve wasn't cooking and he could go and touch him.

That got him a fleeting smile.

“It’s okay, you don’t have to keep saying it. It was a long time ago.”

“I’m sorry because I never had that kind of connection with my parents. I love them and I am sure they love me, but… we were never that close, I think.”

Setting down the knife, Steve raided the spice cabinet for an unholy combination of herbs that should have tasted awful all mixed up together.

“Sometimes I thought that would be easier,” Steve shrugged a shoulder, “but then I remember her, and I know I wouldn’t change a thing. Those memories… they give me strength, when I don’t think I have any left.” Steve paused, half-way through shaking a glass jar of oregano and looked at Bucky oddly. “Why aren’t you close?”

“I don't really know?” Bucky shrugged. “It was like we were always walking different sides of the street. They cared for me and they tried, but they didn’t understand me. A small town wasn’t a place that fit me well, either. I wanted to join the Army so badly, you have no idea. Could barely wait till I was legal. After…“ Bucky looked down at his hands, the left one was still in its glove. He often forgot to take if off. “I got promoted very fast. Before I really understood what was going on, I was doing one classified mission after another. Not only was I gone for weeks or months on end, I couldn't call from the places they sent me to. When I did get back, I could never answer their questions. So… we met less and less often. Eventually we stopped altogether.”

Bucky pulled the glove off his hand. It barely had any scars, just that bit on the top, sneaking up into his sleeve.

“I’m… I’m sorry, Bucky,” Steve said gently. “Family is… hard to replace.”

“It’s not like I lost them. They’re okay, doing well financially. Safe, alive so-”

“And you’re lonely,” Steve interrupted. “You don’t have to brush that aside, or make light of it. I understand.”

“Only, I feel like what happened to you gives you the right to be lonely, while I did this to myself. I wanted to be a soldier so badly, I forgot how to be human along on the way.”

Steve frowned, that pinched brow forming between his eyes, as he turned back to his seasoning. 

“That’s… not how anything works…” Steve said, but he didn’t stop frowning. His words were even and careful. “Nothing justifies being lonely. I lost my mom, sure, but… I found Clint, and Nat…” Steve looked up at him again. “You.”

Bucky smiled.

“People are usually afraid of me.”

“People usually think I'm a whore.”

“You are not. You just sell a fantasy,” Bucky waved his hand, trying not to see the scars and not to think of all the things he had done before he got too fucked up to continue in the service. The protection missions were the rare ones. People of his skill were normally used in much more violent ways.

“But that doesn’t stop people from being assholes, or judging me for it. Sex is sex is sex, as they say. I sell sex; they don’t care how - _which_ is my point, or the point I was going for. It’s hard, for people like us, but… we’re getting there. You have your work, Cloria… me, Nat. It gets better, a little by little. So you don’t… have to brush it aside. My pain doesn’t trump your pain, and we can get better together.”

“Generally, I just feel out of place. Like all those people around me are so fragile, so sheltered. I go into a bank and all I can think of for the first few seconds is where are the exits, what do I have on hand to take down the guards, how can I secure the personnel, and what are my egress routes. Only after that, I remember why I even went there in the first place. It’s like being the black sheep everywhere I go.”

Steve let out a little huff.

“Bucky, that’s ‘cause you wear your damage on your sleeve. The rest of us? Don’t.” 

Steve finally stopped adding different seasonings and tossed everything in a frying pan. 

“How do you wear your damage, then?”

To Bucky’s surprise, Steve flinched. His shoulders came up, but he didn’t shut down like Bucky had seen.

“I… wear it like a shield. I deflect, I seduce, I make a joke. I hide. I blend in.”

“Your body doesn’t hide,” Bucky murmured, watching the body in question. He wasn't sure how aware Steve was of how open he was with Bucky. He constantly turned his back on Bucky, his center of balance was all fucked up, not because he didn't know how to move, but because he obviously didn't care to be careful with Bucky. His pulse wasn’t elevated beyond what being naked with a person you found attractive would be. Steve was incredibly relaxing to be around. Hot, funny, and very, very relaxing. Nobody else was quite this soft when Bucky was around. 

“Because _you_ asked,” Steve said flatly. “I don’t wear my masks with you.”

“It’s peaceful,” Bucky blurted out. “To me, I mean. That you don’t treat me as a threat, as possible danger. It’s… it’s why I’d always come here first after work, not my own home.”

“I feel safe with you,” Steve said softly, glancing at Bucky from under his lashes. “You’re _not_ a threat. Not to me, but… what matters more is I know you’re dangerous. Anyone who ever hurt me… they can’t. Because you’re here.”

“I feel like you are the only person that understands it,” Bucky murmured. “They always think I will go off at them for no reason, skitter away and avoid eye contact. When it’s never _them_ that has to worry.”

“I do understand,” Steve said. “You’re not an abusive man. I would know.”

“Thank you,” Bucky said. Warmth filled his chest at the simple statement, and he felt some of the tension unwind from his shoulders. Usually he didn't care what other people thought of him, but when it was Steve it mattered a whole lot more.

 

Steve smiled at him briefly as he set a pot of water on the stove. 

“Of course.”

“You were about to tell me about Clint.” 

Bucky nudged the nearest chair with his foot. 

“Was I?” Steve eyed Bucky almost suspiciously. “He’s a cop now - worked his ass off for it - but when we cut out from the boys’ home, he was a pickpocket, a con man, whatever to keep us fed.”

“I can’t help but notice that you keep avoiding the topic of how you two came to be close.”

Steve eyed him again, but a smile was tugging up at the corners of his mouth so he couldn’t be mad. Bucky nudged the chair again, watching it shift under the pressure. He kept nudging it until it was halfway out from under the table and decided he should sit down. Assuming a position lower than the person he was interrogating usually served to create a sense of security. While this was supposed to be a conversation, Bucky couldn't help but feel like he had had easier interrogations; certainly more forthcoming prisoners. 

Bucky reached for the chair and pulled it out all the way, straddling it backwards and folding his hands on top the arch. He rested his chin on his hands and did his best not to overreact at the knowledge that Steve had been forced to live on the streets as a young boy.

“I suppose I like you enough to tell you that,” Steve said at last. “The- You know how I… need to be touched?”

“Yes.” Bucky loved that about Steve, how soft and welcoming he was. It gave him pleasure to fulfill that need. Steve must have seen something of his thoughts in his expression, because his smile softened.

“Well,” he drawled, turning back to his multiple tasks, “after my mom passed, I didn’t get touched. Not by anyone. The few times there were… well, that’s how I met Clint. Our foster dad liked to come into the room to ‘touch’. He stood up with me when he tried it one too many times. We’ve been brothers since.”

Bucky became aware of the pain in his knuckles and made a conscious effort to relax his hands and keep the rage out of his body language.

“What happened to the… guy.” Bucky settled on the neutral word eventually, the corners of his lips twisting at the distaste.

Steve’s smile was odd, pleased while something mean briefly flashed through his eyes. 

“The social workers were very curious why Clint and I had stabbed a man, so… he went to jail. I heard he didn’t have a great time there.”

“Criminals usually hate child molesters, yeah,” Bucky confirmed. He’d seen the inside of a few jails, mostly on undercover or recovery missions, and that guy wouldn’t have lasted long in most places. “I don’t think he had a good life there.”

Steve glanced Bucky’s way, watching him almost speculatively. For a moment, Bucky thought he was going to ask for more of the story, but then Steve slowly said, “We went to different homes after that, but I didn’t want anyone to touch me, and the ‘good’ foster parents get weird when they can’t hug you. I got to keep in touch with Clint, though. We wrote letters as we were shuttled about, went to the same school for a while.”

“I’m glad you met him,” Bucky said quietly. “I’m glad you weren't alone in that place.”

“Me, too,” Steve said, then cleared his throat loudly. “Um, so since we were both a wash at the being adopted thing, they sent us to a boys’ home when we were fourteen. Stuck that out for a year, before we did a runner.” Harshly, Steve added, “ _Fuck_ that place.”

Bucky had travelled enough dark places to have seen the really ugly things that happened to kids on the streets. The ones who had nobody to take care of them, nowhere to come back to. He wasn’t sure that the streets were better than the home, but it wasn’t his life, hadn’t been his choice. Steve had managed to get himself out, and that was all that mattered.

“It must have been so hard, being on the streets.”

Surprised, Steve froze and actually turned around to look at him.

“It was,” he said, his words measured again, “but it was better than _that_ place. They… They’re why I don’t want the security cameras, why I don’t want someone watching me. Not just because I put myself out there for my job, because I don’t want… someone else to have that power, no matter how unlikely.”

“I don’t get it. How is that any different from your work? You already put out material that is so much more risky than a few cameras in strategic places.”

Steve sighed, blew upward to try to get hair out his face. When that failed, he went to the sink to wash his hands.

“Because they’re _my_ places. Like it’s _my_ room. No one goes there without my say-so. No one gets to watch me unless _I_ let them. I am aware it’s all a little crazy, but I’ve had more than enough of other people in my life deciding what belongs to me. I’ve had enough of people watching me without my permission.”

Bucky let out his breath very slowly.

“As I said before, I won't pressure you into installing a system you won’t use. I’m worried about you. And the fact I’m not always here.”

Drying his hands on the apron, Steve left the simmering food on the stove and wrapped his arms around Bucky’s shoulders, crouching so their faces were level.

“I love you for that, Buck, honest.”

“But,” Bucky prompted since he knew it was coming.

“But,” Steve conceded, then hesitated. “I tried to touch people again when I was fourteen. I didn’t _want_ it, but I missed it, you know? And then I ended up at the boys’ home and figured out I was gay… and then had one of our caretakers sit me down to replay the video of me and my boyfriend in my bedroom. _My_ bedroom. So, no cameras, okay?”

“Thats… that’s a breach of privacy that should have never happened,” Bucky said, trying to stifle the rage that tried to raise up again.

“A lot of things _shouldn’t_ have happened,” Steve said, his voice gentle as if he were trying to comfort Bucky, “but they did. And now… I like my life a certain way. I like my bedroom off-limits to anyone but you. I like to be touched by the people who care about me, because it… reminds me that I care, too.”

“I really like touching you,” Bucky immediately responded, smiling up at Steve who smiled back. “And it works well since I care about you, too.”

Steve kissed his nose and started to withdraw.

“Just remember, next time you think I don’t care, that I don’t let _anyone_ else in my room. Not even Clint.”

“Not Clint?” That… surprised Bucky. On some level, he had expected Clint to have been a past lover. That level of touching definitely wasn’t strictly platonic.

“Nope,” Steve said, turning around and flashing his perfect ass at Bucky again. “Not Clint. So keep that in mind. And…” Steve tossed him another look, this one surprisingly vulnerable. “I’ll tell you anything you wanna know, okay? I’m just not good at talking about my past. It’s mostly awful.”

“You turned out okay, so clearly you made it past whatever happened to you. And, to be honest, it would be a shame to let my interrogation skills get rusty.”

Steve snorted.

“Good to know I’ll be homework for the teacher.” Steve blinked, looking surprised. “Oh, that would be a good video. I should write that down.”

Bucky felt his throat go a bit dry. He could all but see Steve in white, knee length socks and not much else, waiting for the special lessons from his teacher.

“You want to be the student?” 

“You like that?” Steve purred, giving him bedroom eyes and spreading his feet so Bucky couldn’t help but focus on that ‘v’, and the shadow of his balls beneath. 

Bucky cleared his throat.

“Yeah, I like that a lot.”

Steve grinned.

“You’ll pick out my outfit,” he declared, “and we’ll discuss the script.”

“Yes,” Bucky agreed, nodding a little, “I would love to do that.”

After draining the noodles, Steve tossed everything into a pan together and the smell of stir-fry filled the house. While he dealt with the last stages of cooking, Steve was distracted, ignoring him and their conversation. It was fine; Bucky was used to it, and the food always turned out wonderfully. Bucky thought he was lucky to have someone cook for him every night, and he liked just watching Steve. He didn’t always need to touch Steve, this was enough. It was a new experience, feeling the satisfaction of being in his lovers presence. He couldn't remember ever feeling this way about somebody. The fact that Steve was hot as hell didn’t hurt any, either.

Covering the food, Steve turned and smiled at Bucky again, then deliberately stretched. His arms reached high over his head, muscles bunching and flexing, visible even under his apron. Probably because Steve had arched his back, pushing his chest out so his nipples were visible poking against the flimsy fabric.

Bucky wanted to bite him.

“Almost done,” Steve purred.

It was going to be a long dinner.

**Author's Note:**

> Come and visit us on Tumblr
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